How do i confront my bf about this?

Question

Today I told my bf after school, that I thought he was being too 'clingy' because he said he loved me twice, and were just in a begining of a realationship and also how he wanted to come along to the halloween dance with me and my group of friends, and i told him today that it made me feel unconftorable and that i feel like i need a bit of space and then i gave him a hug and walked home. but also i feel like he is clingy with his words, or something but he's not really flirting with me... like on our first date i kept thinking "why hasnt he out his arm around me" well, now im thinking he was probably shy at the time. so idk i kinda pushed him to kinda do that when i rested my head on his shoulder in the movies, and he held my hand, i did that to show him i want to be flirted with, and i rather did that than confront him about that too, because it would feel awkward to confront him about why he isnt flirting , 1 sec

so, idk now i kinda wanna confront him about that idk it just bothers me because he isnt flirting so much, and also i dont want to confront him about that because i dont want to confuse him, with that i think he is a bit clingy by his words. but feels distant from his actions. and i dont wanna confuse him, because that would be bad.

Answer 1

YOU TOLD HIM WHAT !?!??! yup yup yup now you have to make it up to him big time...there's nothing wrong with a bf being too clingy unless you don't really want to be with him. Sounds like you don't....Maybe you prefer to be not too serious with your relationship. Think about it....if you don't think you want to be with him...tell him ahead of time. FYI...what he did was far from being clingy.

Answer 2

Honey, he's not the only one who is confused. You are pretty confused too. You are both quite young. He's not really sure of how to act or talk around you and you don't really know what you want from him. So I would suggest that if you think he is a good person to have a relationship with then focus more on his good qualities and why you like him than on these minor details. If you only have a boyfriend so that he can conform to some artificial standards you have about how he should flirt or hold your hand or hug you, then maybe you should leave the poor boy alone.
Maybe you could have a conversation with him about "what is love". What are the different kinds of love. What makes one person love another. What does he mean when he says he loves you?

Answer 3

You could be the first gal he has been able to get close to and he doesn't want to lose it. However, he also wants to have a "girlfriend" and try and show her he loves her and that he wants her to be the center of attention. Its an awkward age. You do not say how old the two of you are, I suspect around 14-16. Neither of you should expect the world to stop in its track for your relationship.

My best advice - TALK. He can not read your mind, you can not read his. What do you want from the relationship - what does he want? Aside from flirting, do you want to walk hand in hand with him, talk about futures, sit and just talk about the days events? That's a relationship - without that, its really something else.

Good luck

Answer 4

In order to tell him how you feel, you need to know what you want from him. Giving mixed signals is not the best answer. If you like him then tell him. If you want him to do something then tell him. Guys can't read our minds and they only go off of what the previous girl before you liked. So in order to fix the problem, find yourself first and then get tell him what you want. If he's too clingy, then tell him in a nice way ( because he has feelings to). If he tells you he loves you, you are not obligated to tell it back to him if you don't feel the same way. Remember to be honest with yourself as well as you beau and communication is a key factor in a relationship. If you don't have communication or honesty, then you have nothing.

Answer 5

Shy, clingy, however he is, you'll do the both of you a huge favor if you can help the two of you become accustomed to talking. Try to be open to him when he expresses himself, as allowing himself to be vulnerable may be new as well as being a big step. Confronting isn't inherently bad. It allows the air to be cleared, paves the way for deeper understanding and can increase the quality of your relationship. Validate him so he won't feel threatened or alienated.
Best wishes for attaining a 'comfort zone' with your guy.

Answer 6

Well Well, my friend, here is my 2 cents and Please take it easy. I urge you to be yourself and act normal. Give him space to grow and take time for your relationship. He may be shy or he just do not know how to court you. Do not say anything aand use your body language in a positive way. Learn how to tease him little by little. Do not judge him too much. Try to enjoy your true friendship and learn how to build a solid relationship with each other. Pretty soon I am sure he will open up and express himself more. Remember communication is the best way to make your love life healthy and happy.

Answer 7

He is a high school boy. He is awkward by definition.

You are probably not helping the situation either. I suspect he is somewhat confused.

If you want him to flirt with you, better flirt with him first. You should also make some time for him at the Halloween dance.

Answer 8

1) say that you want him to flirt more with you 2) you say he is too clingy 3)I really hate to say it but you are all over the board............even got me a bit confused. Sounds like you two need a sit down and figure exactly "what the 2 of you want and don't want. Hope I helped........

Answer 9

Darlin,
often times, we answer the questions we pose. If you could take what you just told me, and tell him. It would help. Seems you know this person isnt sensitized to affection. You knew that. You showed him affection. Sensory overload for him. Your the best thing since sliced bread. Your a good teacher tho, misery always teaches more than success.

Answer 10

What do you want from him? He said he loved you and that was too clingy. Then he didn't put his arm around you and you felt neglected. I think you are uncomfortable in this relationship. But I agree that the "L" word came up too soon in the relationship.