everytime I leave his appointments I regret not really talking about "stuff" and would be more comfortable if he knew the real me... I feel like I'm just not important enough..God knows he does his best to try and get me talking but I already know he's applying to colleges to teach psycology, and I feel that if I start talking and get somewhere that he's going to leave..I know it sounds weird but I'm deathly affraid of being abandon..I suffer from BPD and lots of other stuff..Please..any advice would help...
2007-09-07 17:23:16 · 11 answers · asked by chantale 31 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Express yourself to him exactly as you wrote the question here. In fact take a copy of it and read it to him.
Part of BPD is the abandonment issue . . .and you must begin to confront that ... now is a good time to start.
2007-09-07 17:32:45 · answer #1 · answered by Meg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is because you are so afraid that if he knew the real you, he will leave..... And then you are feeling 'abandoned" The biggest fear a BPD individual suffers from. Your protecting yourself from further harm, however, feeling bad about it at the same time.
Remember that the therapist is there for you, it is your time when you are with him, and you can choose to say whatever you want to him. However, your going to need to be more trusting and start talking about stuff so he can help you. Otherwise it is a waste of time for the both of you.
2007-09-08 02:43:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The nice thing about therapy is that everything that goes on in there teaches you something about yourself! Now, you are learning:
1) You wish you would be more open with people
2) You wish you could share the "real you" with others
3) You were abandoned by important people in your earlier life (either in person or in their love for you)
4) You are afraid to lose people now, too
5) You are afraid you couldn't manage on your own
6) You are brave enough to tell us, here, about your problem
7) You are facing your issues, not avoiding them
8) You are an honest person, not in denial
9) You are open to help!
If your therapist leaves, you can get another one, OK? Tell yourself that, over & over.
Join for free www.DailyStrength.org There are others who understand your feelings & will give you lots of help & encouragement. It's almost like having two therapists!
2007-09-07 17:32:17 · answer #3 · answered by embroidery fan 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-10 04:22:42 · answer #4 · answered by kinart 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey I must say that is pretty comedic and good for a story. That's quite neurotic. I've been contemplating on seeing an analyst but I think I'd analyze the analyst and not the other way around.
Anyway your best bet is to talk to him about it. Because maybe you are hurting him by not communicating enough.
2007-09-07 17:32:02 · answer #5 · answered by Austrian Theorist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the attitude i think that might help is to focus on the bottom line which is to overcome the issues and that if you open up there's more of a chance of pin pointing what the problem is, and you can also be comforted in knowing what you say is confidential. tell him the real you, it's the only way to grow.
2007-09-07 18:35:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually you are hurting yourself by not being honest. How can the therapist help you if you won't tell him what the problem is? You are wasting time and money and you won't get better until you are willing to be upfront with him.
2007-09-07 17:30:37 · answer #7 · answered by notyou311 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you NEED a new therapist. For some effed up reason you don't want your current one to know the real you, and when it comes down to it, it's really hurting you.
You have to him go. You need to find a therapist you trust, not one you love.
2007-09-07 17:40:12 · answer #8 · answered by wise1 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Most teachers teach on part-time basis only and never leave their "real" jobs.
2007-09-07 17:31:00 · answer #9 · answered by OC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it is understandable to feel that way - but you are going to be better off by being more honest and getting things dealt with.
here's a book to read
the betrayal bond - patrick carnes
2007-09-07 17:38:54 · answer #10 · answered by art_flood 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋