If I go to the house, we go out, he goes with us somewhere, he is very disrespectful and says he "hates" me etc. etc... he has no real "reason" that he can give for this. This happens with everyone his dad dates or is friends with who is female.. any suggestions as to how to handle this without just calling the whole thing quits??
2007-09-07 16:06:03 · 9 answers · asked by Aimee B 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
also, sitters don't work. He still throws a massive fit.
2007-09-07 16:07:27 · update #1
We're having the same problem with my brother. He wants to act out when my dad is on the phone with his gf or has her over. This needs to be his dad's place to talk to him, but this is what i've told my brother. "look mom and dad wasn't happy together, they're now happier, but why not let them be even happier by dating someone. They're not going to get back together it just wasn't working for them. Dad is still going to be there for you, spend time with you, she's is not trying to replace mom."
2007-09-07 16:11:23 · answer #1 · answered by babygurl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
His dad should not be introducing all his g/f's to his son. If I was the little boy I would be sick to death of it too. The father needs to leave the child with another relative or at a friend's house for occasional dates. The father should explain to the son that he is going out with adult friends and he wants his son to have a good time too. When it becomes serious and marriage is looming then the kid meets the woman, not until then.
When the kid says mean things to you, tell him you are sorry he feels that way because you really like him. But tell him it's okay for him to hate you. Tell him you hope that one day the 2 of you can be friends. No one will ever replace or even try to replace his mom, but be his friend and hostess if the father marries the woman.
2007-09-07 16:20:52 · answer #2 · answered by gma 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He probably thinks you are trying to replace his mom, both you and your bf need to sit him down and explain it to him he is probably really confused all that is on tv is kids parents get divorced and get back together and shove the other one out. makes for a good movie but is the furthurest thing from the truth for reality, i am one of those who think you shouldn't stay together just for the kids sake it will make it worse in the long run the parents do need to be civil with each other and not bad mouth the other in front of the child no matter how hard it is. remeber that maybe their x wife or husband but that is that childs parent
2007-09-07 18:18:54 · answer #3 · answered by chiefs fan 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow, mis read the question at first lol, talk to him, tell him that you don't want to fight with him and that your not even trying to replace his mom in anyway. Tell the father to even talk to him first, that way he can try to clear some things up. Maybe he needs to get to know you. Try taking the 11 year old out on a "date" see if you guys can talk out your problems and get to know him as a person better. Good luck!
2007-09-08 01:21:16 · answer #4 · answered by sarah 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The child is angry seeing his dad with someone who isn't his mom. If you show him your love, he'll realize that you are a good person who has a lot to share with him. This will take time, but be consistent. Of course, if he's out of line, his dad needs to step in to sit him straight. Don't be tempted to step into that role yourself. You need to build trust in him first.
2007-09-07 16:15:47 · answer #5 · answered by Opal 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask the Dad to post and I will answer him. This is for the Father and Son to work on, you might do well not to try to control their relationship.
2007-09-08 01:19:58 · answer #6 · answered by Robert V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is hard for children to see their parent dating anyone other then the other parent. It may take him getting to know you better. You don't have to suck up, but be kind and if you are there for the longrun he will become more excepting. Remember this is hard for him too. Good Luck.
2007-09-07 16:44:49 · answer #7 · answered by debepta 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a very disrespectful and selfish boy. Who do you think made him that way? His parents. Do you really want to date a man who lets his child act like that?
2007-09-07 16:23:24 · answer #8 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he is jealous that it is not his mother....he will be like this for a while....he may still be under the impression his parents are getting back together...his dad needs to explain to this to his son, and to give you the respect you deserve...and you need to be there when his dad gives him this talk.....good luck
2007-09-07 16:13:34 · answer #9 · answered by bubba gumps light 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋