ive had a million phone calls from parents and teachers and a million conversations with her but she wont stop!what should i do?
2007-09-07 15:29:36 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
1. Take away priviledges.
--No friends over on weekends
--No going over to friend's houses on the weekends
--Pack her lunch, and don't give her lunch money. Pack her the plainest lunch known to man: PB&J, apple, and juice. No fruit roll ups or pudding. Make sure that she knows if you find out she is trading with other kids for snacks, she will be punished. If possible, see if you can get a note signed by a cafeteria aid or someone saying she only ate her lunch.
2. Make her write a one page sorry note by hand (make sure they are each different, and she has to use her best penmanship. And if she hates to write in cursive, make her write in cursive. Go over her grammar and spelling, and make her write it all out ENTIRELY for just one little mistake.) to each of the girls, and see that she hand delivers it looks into their eyes and says "I am sorry for bullying you, so-and-so".
3. Ask her why she bullied these girls. See if she is bullied and thinks that it is alright to do so. See what you can do to make sure she knows it is not alright to bully kids.
4. If all else fails, like other users said: conspiracy with the parents of the bullied girls. See maybe they will let their daughters bully your daughter a little bit. But BE CAREFUL -- it could turn physical.
5. I also like the idea of driving her to school. If you have time in the morning, walk her to her classroom. Say "Goodbye sweetie, I love you, remember, bullying is bad!" This will especially work if she is an older girl
6. Another rather drastic measure: make her wear a sign on both her stomach and back saying: "I bullied girls on the bus. I am sorry. I will not do it again" all day long. See that a note gets signed saying she wore it.
2007-09-07 15:52:22 · answer #1 · answered by newsiesno1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you know why she's picking on these girls? There is reason for every behavior; it is important you find out what the reason is and address it. In the meantime, if changing buses or driving your daughter is not an option, than have the school tell the bus driver your daughter is to have an assigned seat in the front of the bus (away from these girls) from now on. Has the school done anything to discipline your daughter, or have they left it all up to you? It should be a joint effort - communication about discipline at school and at home are key. If the school hasn't done anything but tell you about the issue, request help from the school, they should be more than willing to help. Have you done anything other than talking to your daughter? She needs serious consequences for her actions - talking alone is not going to cut it. Turn to the other parents if you have to; ask them, "What would you do if it were the other way around?" Whatever you end up doing, just know that parenting is always a work in progress, and just because you are having difficulty getting through to your daughter right now, does not mean you are a bad parent.
2007-09-07 16:33:52 · answer #2 · answered by Bunny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look at how you relate to her. She picks on other little girls because she's looking for attention. Do you spend quality time with her? Is her Dad in the picture and does he give her adequate attention? Or is something going on at school that maybe you're not aware of? How did you try to get her to stop? Did you ask her why she does what she does? She may respond with a standard "I don't know" but try to figure out what's behind her doing this. At the same time, tell her that each time you get a complaint about her picking on someone a privilege will be taken away. Don't yell or scream or hit. But take away something that is meaningful to her. A favorite toy or TV time or whatever she will miss. When the complaints stop, she gets it back. By rewarding positive behavior she will eventually figure out that she gets what she wants when she acts in a positive way. It's important to be consistant with this discipline in order for it to be effective. If these tactics don't work you may want to consider counseling for her to try to find out what's going on with her.
2007-09-07 15:43:27 · answer #3 · answered by innerradiancecoaching 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Conversations don't always cut it. Words don't always get through to kids. You have to punish her in some way. Take away a privilege or something. Make sure she understands that her behavior is unacceptable. If she sees that the only thing that happens when she acts like this is a discussion with her mom, that doesn't seem so bad to her and she won't understand what she's doing wrong.
2007-09-07 15:34:08 · answer #4 · answered by Rockit 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If she is going to act like a child, treat her like one. Walk her to the bus and actually get on the bus. Go with her to school and speak to the girls she is picking on. Give them your number and have them call if there is trouble. Then walk her to her class and embarass the crap out of her. She will stop or you won't. Also, take away stuff she loves, like soccer or tv or computer. Be tough! You can do it. Sounds like your a little afraid of her too. If so, maybe counceling is the way to go.
2007-09-07 15:34:58 · answer #5 · answered by Kimmi 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
BTW, try not to listen to the answerers who called you names.
Parenting is the hardest thing in the world to do. My favorite answer is to go on the bus with her, walk her to her door, embarrass her a little. That may do it.
And yes, you need to find out if there is something going on at school or at home that is driving this.
Hang in there-you'll get through this!
2007-09-07 15:53:28 · answer #6 · answered by autimom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should invite the little girls she is picking on out for a day at the park or for lunch and NOT let your daughter come, and tell her that if you hear she has been picking on anyone again, you will take that child out for a day of fun and leave her behind. I bet she'd change her tune very quickly!
2007-09-07 15:47:43 · answer #7 · answered by Bitsy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you don't do something, one day she will come home with her teeth in her hands. tell her if she does not stop, that you will be riding the bus along with her; make arrangements with the bus driver and do it!!!!! take charge before something real bad happened. the people that she is picking on might get the brainy idea of becoming a group and bit the hell out of her.
2007-09-07 15:40:37 · answer #8 · answered by COCO 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Take away her favorite toys and ground her until she stops,i bet she stops then,if she starts again just repeat the above plus no desert,no candys make her life miserable,sounds mean but thats what you're going to have to resort to.
2007-09-07 15:36:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
punish her until she stops. take everything from her room, toys, tv, etc. give her something back for each day/week that goes by with a good report. be firm and consistent or she won't stop. then take her to a counselor to find out what's wrong with her that's causing her to be a bully.
2007-09-07 15:42:33 · answer #10 · answered by Carrie 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋