None of us at our office have been invited to our coworker's wedding (kind of understandable due to budgetary reasons). However, our boss is hosting a bridal shower for the coworker. 1. If I go to the shower and get her a gift ($20-$25 gift card?), do I also need to contribute towards another gift for the actual wedding? If so, how much? Are they two separate gifts? 2. If I don't go to the shower, do I need to get her a shower and/or wedding gift at all? We're on friendly enough terms but aren't super close, and no, we don't work in a posh or upscale office. Thanks!!!
2007-09-07 07:30:03 · 33 answers · asked by Jane S 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
A gift is supposed to mark an occasion, offer congratulations or convey your best wishes. If there is an office bridal shower, of course you should contribute a gift. If the whole office is contributing to a wedding gift, then go ahead and add $10 or $20 to the "gift pot"....it is the final total that is the gift and represents the whole office. You don't give a gift just because you are, or are not, invited to a wedding. The gift is not payment for a meal, for heavens sakes! Any office get-together is more fun if everyone participates and, if the boss is hosting the party, you really should show up and participate. As it is an "office" get-together and not a family/relative function, you don't need to spend more than $20.00.
Get a couple of good quality Martha Stewart tea towels at K-Mart and wrap them really pretty and that's fine! Showers are generally for the little kitchen or bath things that every couple needs lots of! Don't let this stress you or your budget out. If your coworker is planning her wedding on a tight budget, she's the first to understand and she will welcome any gesture!
2007-09-07 09:24:02 · answer #1 · answered by Wifeforlife 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
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Not invited to coworker's wedding, shower gift and/or wedding gift required?
None of us at our office have been invited to our coworker's wedding (kind of understandable due to budgetary reasons). However, our boss is hosting a bridal shower for the coworker. 1. If I go to the shower and get her a gift ($20-$25 gift card?), do I also need to contribute towards another...
2015-08-19 05:44:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't go to the shower then you are not obligated to get a shower gift. If you go to the shower and give a gift card then NO you're not obligated to give a wedding gift also. I'm sure she will appreciate your gesture of going to the bridal shower, participating, and bringing a gift. She is just a co-worker not family. If you only decide to contribute 25 to the wedding that is perfectly fine. I'm sure you have a budget just like she does.
2007-09-13 08:28:26 · answer #3 · answered by staymay 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is customary for offices to have showers for people. Usually a group of people will chip in $10 and buy a group gift. Why don't you get together with a few other people and do that? At my place they don't usually bring individual gifts. Either way you should go if it's a small office. You don't need to give a wedding gift also.
2007-09-07 11:24:02 · answer #4 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you go to the shower, give a gift there, the $25 gift card will be fine. You are not required to go to the shower, so if you don't go, the decision to give a shower gift or not is yours.
You are not required, EVER, to give a gift for the wedding, whether you can attend or not, whether you've been invited or not. Only give a wedding gift if you want to.
I personally would just give a shower gift.
2007-09-07 07:37:05 · answer #5 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why don't you ask the other girls what they are doing? perhaps you could all contribute towards one gift. if not and you are buying a gift on your own - i have to say i hate gift cards, and would rather see you purchase something. if you aren't superclose and it isn't a upscale office then perhaps you could just do a token gift like a set of tea towels, with a pot holder, and oven mitts. anything along that line, because lets face it, doesn't matter how much linens you get you can always use them.
as for wedding gifts - because we went through a real run of weddings and then babies it was costing each of us too much money so we finally passed 'a rule' in our office, no individual gifts - we pass the hat, everyone contributes ten or fifteen dollars and then we purchase one gift from everyone. usually something along the line of bath linens, set of bed sheets, a nice tablecloth.
2007-09-11 12:36:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Techinically, even those invited to the shower and the wedding are not obligated to buy a gift for both. If you're not invited to the wedding i see no reason to buy a wedding gift. It's perfectly fine to just do a gift for the shower if you choose.
2007-09-07 08:20:56 · answer #7 · answered by LB 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't go to the shower you are not obligated to get her anything. If you do go to the shower I think the card idea is fine. I also think you do not need to get her a wedding present if you are not going to the ceremony. If you really feel the need to get her a wedding gift, just get her a bigger gift for the shower that will cover the wedding as well.
2007-09-07 07:35:27 · answer #8 · answered by musicgrl42002 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you go to the shower, you need to bring a gift. It is the one and only event where you HAVE to. The wedding is your personal choice. You could chip in to a group wedding gift, but only if you want to.
If you don't attend the wedding or the shower, no gifts are necessary, but if you like her and feel like, I am sure she'd be happy to be thought of.
see miss manners, judith martin, she's awesome.
2007-09-14 06:03:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Offices and workplaces usually do have a separate bridal shower, even if they aren't invited to the wedding. Typically, everyone chips in and then one person buys the gifts. $20 is a lot, at least where I work. Think $10. Most of the costs will go to your boss.
2007-09-07 09:19:00 · answer #10 · answered by Pink Denial 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋