My 5 yr old daughter has a tendancy to be slightly snotty and ignore people when the address her. For example, if the bus driver asks how she is she completely ignores him. Or if her day care givers say goodbye she will do the exact same thing. She sometimes even pulls this trick with me when I ask her questions. She is shy to an extent but for the most part is very confident. I am very sociable and friendly so I don't understand why she behaves in this manner. I have tried to tell her it is rude and she should answer to be polite. Any suggestions? Thanks!
2007-09-07 06:04:59 · 13 answers · asked by laura_lovely_sweet 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Her hearing is fine, and she doesn't just do it in situations when she may be shy, she does it with people she knows well. I'm quite sure purposefully...
2007-09-07 06:16:42 · update #1
Seems to me she is getting attention by doing this. I would ignore the issue when it happens and maybe when you are home, if she asks you something you could show her what it feels like. Then, calmly explain to her that this is how others feel when she does it to them. Explain to her that it makes people feel badly just like her and that she needs to work on being more polite.
Good Luck
2007-09-07 06:10:09 · answer #1 · answered by Deb 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit down with her and tell her that when people talk to her she should at the very least respond with eye contact and a nod! That takes no effort, and should be the minumim that you expect from her. Practice and role play with her and see if you can make her understand how it feel to be the reciever to her rudeness. You be her and she can be you for the task, that will normally make a bigger impact. Acknowledge her when you see her doing a good job responding and she will get over what could very well be a strange case of shyness.
2007-09-10 21:56:38 · answer #2 · answered by kimba 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does she usually talk to the day care providers and bus driver? If so, don't worry about it ... just keep emphasizing that she is hurting people's feelings by ignoring them (and have her apologize). However, if there are certain situations (like day care and the bus) where she is always silent even though she talks normally in other situations, you should talk to your pediatrician to rule out selective mutism. Selectively mute kids can be very chatty in some environments but literally too anxious to speak in others (usually related to school), and they are often mistaken for being intentionally rude. Check out www.selectivemutism.org.
2007-09-07 13:59:08 · answer #3 · answered by ... 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Shyness and snobery are two different things, even if the end result is the same. Shy people find it very difficult to answer questions where snobby ones CHOSE not to, so I think you need to determine which she is. A good suggestion was made to have her hearing tested- maybe she's reluctant to answer if she doesn't fully understand what people say if she can't hear them.
2007-09-07 13:12:52 · answer #4 · answered by GEEGEE 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would start by getting her hearing tested and if it's fine, try to ask her why she is acting this way, if no response, punish her. when she does this you let her know right away you dissaprove and let her know she will be punished when she gets home., then when you get home punish her in her room no toys or tv or even go as far as to stand her in a corner facing the wall for a certain time and each time she does it raise the time of punishment. i understand it's hard and might seem a little harsh but now at this age is the perfect age to teach them or else they will grow up snobish. good luck!
2007-09-07 13:26:49 · answer #5 · answered by ccutestuff2001 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
this is very interesting to me too. At home I have an out going dancing machine! talks up a storm,sings swims just as friendly but Lord around certain people she completely clams up,hide her face in my lap and will not speak! (mainly at my job!) and lord they try so hard with her .but I don`t think it is a discipline issue like some one said. I think we wait it out,and do explain they only want to talk to her,and be friends,i figure they will grow out of it.Good luck
2007-09-12 13:41:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her why she chooses to ignore them maybe she is not hearing them have you had that checked? maybe you should ignore her and show her how it feels when you are rude to her i mean don't go overboard but next time she asks a little question just pretend you didn't hear then explain to her that the way she felt is the way she makes others feel and she needs to respond when people talk to her
2007-09-07 13:16:02 · answer #7 · answered by itsagirl!! 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a control issue.
Could be she wants to control others, or make others beg for her attention.
I would turn the tables on her, when she speaks to you after she's ignored someone, don't answer her, or acknowledge she's even spoken to you.
Sometimes children don't understand that they are being hurtful until they experience it for themselves.
2007-09-07 13:56:09 · answer #8 · answered by Sumie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well girl, let me just throw this out there. when i was a kid, people use to say they had spoken to me, and honest to God i did not hear them. there is nothing wrong with my hearing either. but sometimes i was so focused on what i was doing or just so deep in thought that i truly did not realize anyone was speaking to me. maybe it is the same with her.
2007-09-12 21:10:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How's her hearing? She might not be doing it on purpose.
2007-09-07 13:09:06 · answer #10 · answered by People for the Ethical Treatment of Vegetables 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋