Recently, My fiance's daughter in her 30s moved in with her two children. The daughter uses profanity constantly and yells at her boys constantly. The older child hits the smaller child on a constant basis and is disruptive and is not disciplined. The father of one of the children is in prison for drug use and sales. The other father is not responsive to wanting the older child to move in with him. They are not my relatives yet, and it is getting on my nerves. I am not responsible for them, but my fiance felt it was necessary to "rescue" them. Now she regrets their presence because it has disrupted our quiet existance. They are annoying, we don't really have the room for them, and they are eating us out of house and home. I don't see where it is my place to discipline the boys and the daughter seems to not have control and gets upset and violent over the slightest thing. She played a video called Borat, and the content was very inappropriate for the boys to watch. Any suggestions?
2007-09-07 02:37:47 · 6 answers · asked by lrpharm54 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
wow. sounds like your almost step daughter could use a few parenting classes. it's time for her mom to step in and let her daughter know what is expected. maybe call your county and ask about low rent housing for them. they need to get out of your home. as long as she's there, nothing will change and your life will be hell
2007-09-07 02:47:17 · answer #1 · answered by racer 51 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok, 10 years in the past -- while she replaced into approximately 18 via your submit --- she replaced into appearing like a toddler. considering then she looks to are transforming into her act greater or much less at the same time and is attaining out to Daddy to stroll her down the aisle. She's prolonged an olive branch and you have thrown it returned in her face. You, Sir, are the single that is appearing like a toddler now. strengthen up, buddy, or you will on no account have a place on your toddler's or grandchildren's lives. She's an person and you may't recover from the ideas that she made while she replaced right into a toddler. per danger you weren't in touch in her existence as much as you should or could have been, yet you have of project to instruct that around now. end being a center-elderly judgmental prick, or you would be an old and lonely judgmental prick. My childrens made undesirable selections alongside the way, yet I on no account stopped loving them. i ought to have been a bitter old goat such as you -- and can have justified it to myself -- yet they does no longer be in my existence at present. You on no account end being a father in case you particularly love your toddlers yet you stopped being a discern an prolonged time in the past. supply her your love unconditionally and you should be shocked what you get in return. grant suggestion while asked, yet enable her be certain her existence and stay it her way if she does not. or purely be a lonely old goat. you would be smart to take a lesson from the guy that she's marrying. He stood via her for 8 years, did the excellent situation in offering for his toddler, and that i will wager that he's "Daddy" to his quickly-to-be stepchild. Too many adult men thankfully settle for the region of "sperm donor" (yeah, seem interior the mirror, buddy!) and stroll away. This guy did no longer and he seems to be lots greater of a guy which you ever have been!
2016-10-10 03:15:25 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A parent should always provide consequences for actions they don't want repeated. So even though your "step-daughter" is 30 she needs to have consequences. We are good about laying down the law at our house. You will do this or this is acceptable and this is not acceptable. If you want to stay in our house or eat our food then these are the things that are expected of you, if you don't do them then these are the consequences. I would definately try to get your fiancee to put some rules and expectations in place and have some real consequences or they could be out of control and there forever.
2007-09-07 04:34:45 · answer #3 · answered by mrskerlin 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If your fiance is okay with this situation , get out of there. You do not need this situation. Is this your house or her's? sounds like you are being used by both women. 1 suit case is okay a steamer trunk and 2 back packs is a bit too much. Before it is to late get daughter out or look for another fiance
2007-09-07 02:58:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
♥ Get them out of the house. My family went through a similar situation. My mom took in her little sister [[only by a couple of years]], her boyfriend, and her two boys [[age 11 and 15 almost 16]]. My mom is on disability because she has had over 21 knee and ankle surgeries, but because she wasn't getting paid because of wutever reason she had to go back to work. She was working all night at a Hotel when her sister moved in. When they moved in things got BAD! They ate her out of house & home, they broke windows & all her collectible figuriens, they left dirty clothes, tissues & dishes everywhere, they'd run the AC with the windows & door wide open, the did drugs in the house, etc. My mom tried to deal with it but after them ruining so many things & not letting her sleep during the day she asked them to leave. She asked numerous times, finally she had to go up to the court and get a paper notorized saying that they had such & such amount of days to get out. They are no longer living there and things are so much better for her! If I were you I'd get that paper and have them leave. Good Luck!
PS~ I know this is your fiance's family, but they have to want the help. And if they appreciated it she would get ahold of her boys and help out with things.
2007-09-07 02:51:24 · answer #5 · answered by NCIS ♥ Addict 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What? You don't feel like is your place to discipline? Aren't they in YOUR house? Anybody that comes to live with you have to abide by your rules sir. Whether they like it or not. If she doesn't like it then tell her to hit the road. Obviously she sounds inmature and I feel sorry for those kids. But if you want peace in your house you need to take care of business.
2007-09-07 03:02:09 · answer #6 · answered by Pinolera 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋