19 and hate any physical affection(hugging,kissing... sex etc) ???????

Question

I am 19 and hate physical contact other then boxing, which I love and am damn good at. I have not probably hugged some one since about 8th grade when a girl hugged me which was uncomfortable for me. Since then I have not had any physical contact with anyone other then knocking people out in the ring. I just dont like to be touched, so stay out of my invisible bubble. I dont understand why people cant get that I just dont like any physical affection what so ever, never kissed a girl or anything cuz I just dont like all that touchy feely crap. I am built like crazy and girls always want to touch my six pack, but when I dont let them they get the impression that I am gay or something, no just dont like to be touched. By the way I cant stand the thought of gay people, but as long as they stay away from me who cares what they do. Why cant people get this and why do they think I am gay???????? I am not gay and dont have a problem so quit with that not my question

Answer 1

I believe that you have a frigid problem.

The word frigid is defined as cold. It has a sexual connotation as well, in the sense that a frigid person is a person that does not response favorably to the sexual advances of another person.

It just doesn't happen to women, guys can be frigid too.

Also I kind of suspect you did not have a warm and fuzzy home life. You have a lot of anger in you and boxing is a good way to you, to release it..

Seriously, you should seek some counseling because this is not all in the realm of normal..

Good Luck

Answer 2

Well dude, I really don't know what to say. I can see why people think your guy but some people ask me if I'm gay too just because I don't have a girlfriend. But I don't think there's anything to worry about. Maybe that's the way God made you. Everyone is different. The only thing that may be the reason you don't like being touched is from your childhood. People who have been abused normally have this type of problem. But I'm not a doctor so that's just something to think about.

Answer 3

I have a problem with touchy, feely physical contact myself and suspect I might have a mild form of Autism, which leads to feeling like any physical contact is sensory overload. I am in no way saying this directly applies to you but you might want to consider all the possibilities, so you may have a more satisfying life and not feel like an outsider.

Answer 4

It's hard for people to believe that not everyone longs for intimacy. In today's world, with tv and movies spouting love as physical intimacy, it seems unrealistic for someone to just dislike being touched. It equates to not wanting love. To most people, an avoidance of any kind of affectionate touching usually means you don't like whoever is trying to touch you. If most of the people who want to touch you are girls, and you don't want those girls to touch you...it adds up to the conclusion that you don't like girls. See the logic?

In all actuality, I can understand the desire not to be touched. I grew up in a family where physical contact (like hugging) was a sign of weakness. We slapped and wrestled instead to show affection. By the time I was 17, I too was very uncomfortable with being touched. The only person who I allowed to touch me at all was the person I chose to be intimate with. It actually took two friends from an affectionate family to show me that I had an avoidance for physical conduct. I had to make a concentrated effort to allow people to even hug me.

You should consider trying to break down your avoidance of being touched. I know it might seem like something you would never want to do, but you are missing out on the gentler side of physical contact. And while I admit I do not hug everyone, I do save all my affection for my husband and children now. It's comforting to know I can be affectionate with them whenever I want without being weak.

Hope this helps.

Answer 5

Just wondering if something sexual happened to you as a child or younger teen. Because this sounds like the symptoms of a abuse of some sort. I can relate to the no touching thing because i was like that at one time. I still do not like to be touched by too many people but I have gotten better over the years. Just explain to people that you just don't like to be touched by anyone female or male. If they can't understand something that simple then they need to leave you alone and fling their selves on someone else. Everyone had boundaries this happens to be one of yours their is nothing wrong with you. You will deal with your boundaries in your way and in your time.

Answer 6

ok fine there is people that don't like people invading there personal space but when it comes to the person they love they don't mind all that touchy feeling crap.

even though u not gonna even take a second look at this..but u have ISSUES!!! except digest get over it.

y i say so u love the act of violence or a brutal sport over the show of affection. and no not all boxers are like u some have wives and loves the affection they get from them.

if u really wanna sort things out, talk it out...else go through life without love u might be fine but u not gonna have the distraction of boxing all ur life.

Answer 7

You might not be gay but you do have a problem. People do not understand because it is not a normal human reaction. Your enjoyment of knocking people out is anotehr symptom of a deeper problem. You are not going to be able to live a normal life this way and you just might let that love of hurting people get out of hand and land you in jail. If you are not just some troll, you do need to seek help because there really is something wrong.

Answer 8

You're just a tough guy and a "touch me not". I think there's a lot of people out there that don't like expressing there affection to others. Maybe when you find a girl that you really like, you'll want to be affectionate with her. But I want to know, how are you around your family concerning this issue?

Answer 9

Did your parents ever hug you as a child or were you abused? That's not intended as a criticism - but observation.

It sounds like a defense mechanism you used as a child as many people do. Lots of men take on boxing or weight lifting because they felt helpless as children when they were beaten or saw their mothers beaten by their fathers or mother's boyfriends.

I could be way off base with this. But I can assure you, if you at least allow yourself to have close social relationships and give yourself time to allow yourself to know someone as a friend - and trust them - over time - you will want to touch them in a healthy affectionate way.

Give yourself time to get to know others and let others know you. Don't worry about the gay thing. If it doesn't apply - let it fly. People aren't used to seeing 19 yr old guys with great bods who don't take advantage of it with women.

Answer 10

You might consider talking to someone about your problem because, thats what it is. This is adult-hood brother. Your gonna get touched odds are before your boxing career is over knocked out, and besides boxing is a dieing sport you need to get into mma, it involes a little more touching. which might help with you problem. And women think your gay because you won't let them touch you, so you already know how to fix that if you want to. I don't know what happend to you to make you not want to be touched but it is a serious problem, that you might need to see a doctor about it. I mean a 19 yr old boy who doesn't want a girl to touch him??? come on man you are honestly going to stand there with your boxing gloves on and tell me you don't want that? What the F is your problem? You need to sit down and get comfortable with people touching you because its going to happpen, and you need to accept it.

Sonojudan
"Kids got problems, someone should of told him we all got problems."