Hello all. I live with my GF and her 3 year old daughter. My GF works as a barmaid. We - me, her and her daughter geton well. Her daughter likes me. We talk about our future together - marriage etc. Before we moved in I agreed to look after her daughter for one of the evenings while she works. Im now being pressured into looking after her for a second night. I dont mind doing it too much but dont want to be used as a doormat. Do people think im being unreasonable.
2007-09-06 15:44:10 · 15 answers · asked by Pa J 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sorry Pa J but I do think that you are being unreasonable. If indeed you do marry this woman then you will not be babysitting but fathering this child while your partner is away at work, so may as well look at it like that now also. I would imagine that if you are both living together at present than the finances are also equally split so why would you want her and/or you to pay for a babysitter when your available to do so. In all honesty I do not believe for a minute that this woman is using you as a doormat but rather she is looking at you as her peer and equal and you should feel privilaged that she trust you to look after and be responsible for the most important thing in her life, her little girl. Best of luck to all involved.
2007-09-06 15:57:01 · answer #1 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My question is...Why are you living as a family if you don't think of yourself, your girl, and her daughter as a family? If you are talking about marriage, you should be at the point where you love her child as if she were your own. If that little girl was your own, would you want her to be sent to a babysitter in the evenings while you are at home doing nothing? There's no such thing as being a doormat when it comes to kids. You are a father figure to that child now and she probably would rather be with you in the evenings then with someone else and their family.
2007-09-06 22:53:29 · answer #2 · answered by LuvMyGirls 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're living together as a family. That's what families do. You're the man of the house, the father figure so to speak, so act like a father and take care of the child.
The other alternative is to ask her to quit and stay home with the kid and you go out and make the money to support the "family".
2007-09-06 22:48:16 · answer #3 · answered by Elt 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, what do you expect in the long run if you two get married??? Won't being with her daughter be part of it??? It's not like she can get rid of the kid...
I'd take it as a lesson, for both your future... if it gets there!!!
But if you really don't feel like it, I'd suggest thinking about your relationship with her a little bit more...
Good luck!
2007-09-06 22:49:56 · answer #4 · answered by jcarriere007 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, you live with her - You took on the responsibility of living with a woman with a child. IT is not dating. I personally hope the child is ok in all of this. You are her main male figure in her life and you don't even know if you are going to be her step father. If you did not want that responsibility than why did you take it on?
2007-09-06 22:48:51 · answer #5 · answered by CherryCheri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just get ready for a full time babysit when y'all get married and if she is still working as a barmaid.
2007-09-06 22:48:41 · answer #6 · answered by psycho magnet 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U knew that she had a daughter and if she is out working then help her out. Now if she wants to party thats a different story.
2007-09-06 22:48:29 · answer #7 · answered by naynay562000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are talking about marriage it's called "Parenthood". It's the husband's duty to help raise the child ... step daughter or natural ... you will have the obligation to take care of her while her mom is at work.
And it won't be referred to as babysitting.
2007-09-06 22:47:40 · answer #8 · answered by Jinjer S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why wouldn't you? If you're going to marry her, you will be taking on the responsibility of her child - parenting the child - so it's not really baby-sitting anymore.
2007-09-06 22:48:22 · answer #9 · answered by :://::Christi::\\:: 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man, if you plan to live with this woman, then be prepared for worse. Trust, us, women, are like that, especially with children. NO time for romance.
2007-09-06 22:49:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋