Help getting out of something you can't get out of...!?!?

Question

Hey, i'm 15 years old now, and now that im in high school, there's so much going on, that i can't keep up with boyscouts which my dad is making me do. Problem is, it's affecting schoolwork and i seriously hate it...not that i hate the organization, i just hate having another thing to do...so i go up to him and tell him that its not something i would like to do, and the responce has to do with it looking good on college apps and that it would be very good for me to do. also that he wants me to do it...I dont! and ive said that..it's frustrating to me because everytime i get yelled at, its for being behind in boy scouts or having bad grades which is because of the organization...this was told to my dad by me, and yet im still doing it!!! so i decided that i wanted to ignore the fact that im in it and focus on my schoolwork, but it keeps getting in the way, meetings,camps,ect. Not only that...it's hard to ignore constant yelling from him and contradicting statements like..for ex.

for example...on wednessday: You need to email these people tomorrow and let them know you need to close up your merit badges...thursday comes around and we're in the car..."Did you e-mail the people yet?" I simply said no because i was going to do it today. instead of a nice responce it was..yelling...I TOLD YOU TO DO IT YESTERDAY WHY DIDNT YOU DO IT? NOW YOUR EVEN MORE BEHID AND YOU ONLY HAVE A WEEK TO FINISH IT!...ok....i told him that yesterday he said i should do it today, and responded to me telling me that he wanted me to do it yesterday...I am so confused so i said oh, you should have said so because you said.....and he goes on with me having to be so technical every minute of my life...it's really tearing me apart and i cant finish school with decent grades and it's something i would like to do..graduate with decent grades...and it's not looking like its something i can do if this keeps up...help me please? what should i do??!?!?!?im going insane...i have a huge test tomorow,

but also a boy scout meeting tonight that will last all night and i cant not go because my dad is forcing me to ....=( sorry for the long story...thank you for reading though

Orak, I have band as well which takes up a lot of time...monday night practices, saturday all day practices, 6:30 0 period every day except wednessday, playing at every football game..its a big commitment...no, unfortunately i do not get 8-9 hours a night more of 5-7 a night...sadly..=P Im so tired after school...neutral party, or what would be close to it is probably my friends who are more on my side becaue they are in the band as well lol...

other than that, not much i can say

Answer 1

Hello Jon:

It sounds like you are under a great deal of stress. Besides school work and Scouts, what other activities take up your time? Do you get 8-9 hours of sleep a night?

Is there a trusted adult who can intervene for you? Your Scoutmaster, religous leader, teacher, principal, physician or other adult you can speak with? Find a 'neutral party' and explain to them about your situation.

I think your father is pushing you to complete your Eagle, as he knows that your life will only be getting busier, not quieter. The sooner you can complete the award, the more likely you will do so. However, you do have until you are 18 to complete the Eagle badge. Merit badges do not have a time frame, you just need to complete all of the requirements prior to your 18th birthday. You will want to get them all done by the time you are 17 1/2, so that there is room for tying up loose ends.

If school is too stressful at this time, you may need to take some time off from Scouts, or reduce your Scouting to one meeting a month and go camping quarterly.

What are YOUR goals for YOUR life? Do YOU need to go to college? Do YOU need to earn the Eagle? Your father needs to focus on YOUR needs, rather than what he wants for you. Of course, your options will be wider in scope if you have a degree, and if the Eagle helps you get the degree, you should earn it. But not at the expense of your physical or mental health.

Best of luck.

Keep on Scoutin'

Answer 2

MAYBE YOU CAN TALK TO YOUR TEACHERS. I JUST GRADUATED AND I ALSO HAD TO WORK AND DO COMMUNITY SERVICE HOURS. NOW THAT WAS HARD LOL BUT THIS IS WHAT YOUR GOING TO TELL YOUR TEACHERS... THAT THIS IS YOUR FAVORIT SUBJECT AND THAT YOU PLAN TO BE A TEACHER OF THAT SUBJECT BUT YOUR HAVING SOME TROUBLE KEEPING UP BECAUSE THE COLLEGE/SCHOOL YOU WANT TO GO TO DEMANDS YOU TO HAVE A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF HOURS OF COMMUNITY HOURS. SO JUST ASK THEM WHAT YOU CAN DO IN ORDER TO NOT FAIL THAT CLASS. BUT DON'T TELL THEM INFRONT OF ANYONE JUST YOU TO. THAT'S WHAT I DID AND I WENT FROM AN C TO A IN TWO WEEKS. THEY JUST WANT TO KNOW THAT YOU CARE. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 3

Poor thing I wish I could help you. I mean you're old enough to stand up for yourself but I see how your dad is. What's your mother's say on this?