Women with Children?

Question

Is it really hard for men to date women with kids? And Why???? Please explain!

Answer 1

If you are looking for a realtionship and you have found someone that is worth a realationship, it won't matter that you have kids. You don't ever need to be with a man that is unsure of you having children!! EVER!!! And that is one thing excuses cannot be made for. I haven't ever had an issue with dating with a child. Just DO NOT bring them around as a boyfriend until you know that you are going to be in a serious realtionship. Its hard for children to lose a father in the home and it drags them through unnecessary hurt. Introduce them way down the line during a get together as a friend and see how they are around them. If a man can't love your kids, he can't love you. Point blank!!!! love ya!

Answer 2

I have 3 children and I've been divorced 12 years and I have some experience with this. Men that wanted to date would often get frustrated with me because they would call at the last minute to go out and couldn't understand why I couldn't do that. I had to find a baby sitter which isn't easy at the last minute and sometimes I didn't have money to pay for one. Then I had to be back home by 9 or 930 on school night to make sure my children went to bed so they could get up and go to school the next morning. I couldn't go drinking, partying and stay out all night because I had work and responsibilities.
I also had men that really didn't want to be around my kids because they had bad experiences with other women's children in which the children weren't happy about the divorce, or weren't happy about their mother dating and it was very uncomfortable. In 12 years I have only let one man meet my children and I regret it. My children have enough abandonment issues from their Dad without getting attached to some man that may or may not stay around. This particular man had bad experiences with other children and it was a problem at the time that he didn't want to do "family," things that were important to me. Now, I am glad that he was't interested as it turned out he wasn't who or what I thought him to be.
Also allot of women especially with kids are just looking for a meal ticket. They need the income and will pretty much do anything to hook in some poor sap they don't even care about just to pay their bills. It gives the rest of us a bad name.
Hope this helps.

Answer 3

It's hard because the kid is always first. Meaning the dates will be cancelled, cut short, and scheduled around the kid's needs. Your romantic weekend getaway can be obliterated by the kid's flu bug. You can't have sex just anywhere in her house. Then there's the issue of what your role is going to be -- can you discipline the kid? What's your relationship with her ex?

And let's not forget the basic caveman thing, men want their wives to be virgins and all resident offspring to be sprung forth from their own mighty loins.

It's all do-able for a long-term relationship, but for casual or early dating, it's a lot more complicated than someone who doesn't have kids.

Answer 4

It's not just women. It's hard for women to date men with children. It's complicated. They aren't your kids. You don't have a say in anything that concerns them. It's a huge commitment. The person without children is at a huge disadvantage. I am a stepmom. It's tough. Would I do it again? NO! I love the kids and I love my husband but it's been very tough/difficult.

Answer 5

most men don't want the extra "baggage". there is so much to having kids, men want to date a women without worring about diaper and if and when they can go somewhere.

you may get a stable man looking for a family to settle down with or he may have fallen so madly in love that children are only a small distraction.

however, most men who are only interested in dating, will not want to date a women with kids.

Answer 6

I don't think it's hard, but there are definitely differences. I'm dating a guy who has three kids. We do stuff together with the kids, together with just my kid and then we do stuff with just us.
Kids are an extra dynamic on a relationship. You can't just focus on each other and getting to know each other....and often their are ex's involved that cause problems. (His ex is psycho!) If you want to go out alone you have to find and pay for a sitter - have to be home at a particular time.
Different is definitely a better description of it than hard.

Answer 7

We have a biological imperative to prefer having our own children. It's hard-wired into people, and it takes a lot to overcome it. Likewise, single men very often are not looking to become fathers right away. Generally, men who are dating are looking only for adult companionship, and children are seen as a distraction.

Me, I'm unusual, I like women with children. That's probably why I'm staying with the one I have.

Answer 8

I've known plenty of women with kids who dated a lot more than I do (and I have no kids) so it apparently isn't a huge issue...especially the older people get (30s and up) you almost expect your potential dates to have children.

Answer 9

the guy i am currently dating, whom by the way, is an incredible catch, dated a woman with a kid for 6 years prior to us hookin up...

and we have talked about it in detail, why his situation with his previous girlfriend/fiancee didnt work...and it all had to do with her child from a prior relationship.

kids are a huge responsibility, and the responsibility of the person who decided to have unprotected sex, or tried to keep a man in her life, or was psycho enough to just want a kid without any true commitment with a man...

unfortunatly those that come into the picture after the fact are dealt a bad hand...they might like the woman, but that child who pulls on their sleeve, asks a million questions, breaks their things, doesnt give them peace, and costs them money wasnt their desicion, its just a nussance to them...

the mothers/girlfriend as well, can be very different than a normal single woman, cause they have a priority in their life that comes before the man, and every man wants to be a womans center of attention, at least for a good part of the initial relationship...

i hope this helps more than hurts but girl we all have to 'sleep' with our desicions, and your child was yours, not your future dating prospects.

Answer 10

Well, it depends on whether you've got a good man, or a selfish jerk. A selfish jerk will say that it's really hard to date you blahblahblah we can't screw around whenever I want it and we have to think about your kid and stuff. *whine, pout* A good man will be more than willing to go to kid-friendly places and keep the messing around until after bedtime. Sounds like you're dating somebody who's looking for a Mommy to take care of him, not an equal partner who just happens to have offspring.