Etiquette: should you remove your shoes when entering somebody's house?

Question

I live in a strange part of North America where one is often expected to remove one's shoes upon entering a friend's house. Is this normal where you live?

Should I have to remove my shoes if they are clean and free from mud, water and snow?

Some friends say my shoes bear germs and quite possibly crud from dog feces and human saliva deposited by spitting. Off they must come! Walk around in stocking feet, even if I'm wearing a suit!

Is this normal where you live???

Answer 1

Yes, I would say it is normal. It is common courtesy when entering someone's house to ask them if they want you to take off your shoes(or to just go ahead and do it). Who knows what you have stepped on or if your shoes really are clean and don't have any dirt on them. If you want to walk around your own home with your shoes on obviously that is your business, but you shouldnt just assume it is okay in everyone elses.

Answer 2

I do not think that a custom like this is particularly "the norm" for any given region here in the US. I believe that it is more of an individual preference and at the extreme a family tradition. I do not think it is necessary to ask if you need to remove your shoes when entering a house. In fact i think that creates a barrier between the host and the guest. It changes the atmosphere from a nice, warm, inviting home feeling to a very strict, uptight and business like feeling. Of course if there is a suitable reason (muddy shoes) then by all means you should take your shoes off in respect. Other wise, floors are made to be walked on, right? Don't put too much thought into this, you will drive yourself nuts!

Answer 3

If you see shoes next to the door, it is more or less a must, especially if it is carpeted. But if it is hardwood floor and it is summer time, it is not too rude to leave your shoes on.... it depends the time of year, the floor, and where you live..

Really, if you have good hosts, they will let you know if you should remove your shoes or not. Think about it, if it is snowing and you are entering into a carpeted house. Making a mess of your friend's place is not a good idea. It is common sense, I think.

Is this normal where I live? I live in CT and last few times I enter into my friends' homes, they all told me to keep my shoes on (it was summer time and they have hardwood floor). But then I took my shoes off anyway.... because I feel more comfortable without my shoes.

BTW, I used live in Manhattan and it is not normal to take off your shoes there.... mind you, most apartments there are small and have hardwood floor.... I also lived in Canada before, there, it is more or less a must... it snows more than 6 months there....seems that way anyway.

Answer 4

Unless you are offering to clean the carpet or floor, respect the rules of the house. Some people and cultures observe that you must remove your shoes when entering the house. The statement about germs is true. You cannot see them and they are on the ground. If you have a problem with removing your shoes(uh oh foot odor!) then you should ask for a pair of slippers or flip flops.

Answer 5

Ever heard of the saying "When in Rome, do as the Romans do"? So, if you live in a place where visitors take their shoes off before entering a house, then you should do the same. It's not because your shoes are dirty or muddy, it's just that it's a practice you have to live with. This is also true in some parts of Japan, specially in homes. No, we don't do that in the Philippines where I live. Although there are guests or visitors who would prefer to leave their shoes outside because they feel that bringing them into the house would mess the clean floor. But this is not requred here.

Answer 6

I would find it insulting if I was asked to remove my shoes upon entering someones home. I am not unaware that if I have feces on my shoes, I should remove them. If that were the case, I would not present myself at their door.
If it was raining or muddy, my host should have a mat outside the door so I could remedy the situation. (Although if I had to walk through rain or mud, they should have taken care of that problem. I also realize that in some cultures it is insulting if you don't remove your shoes.
My sister wants everyone to remove shoes because she loves her white carpet.
Go figure -
But if I am wearing a great pair of red heels, I really don't want to leave them at the door.
I guess we should respect everyones request.
Biscuit, you will carry more "germs "home on your uncovered feet after you put you shoes back on than you would on the shoes that walk to your car.

Answer 7

I personally think it is a matter of respect. If you notice that people have left their shoes off by the door, or they have a really light colored carpet, then you should take them off.
Plain and simple. It won't kill you to do it, but it may make all the difference in the world to that person. The other thing to keep in mind (although I'm sure that this is not always the case) but I know of some people that have some severe OCD and they feel that shoes bring in lots of germs. Whether I think this is true or not, doesn't matter. If a person has a preference about what you can and cannot do in their home, then you follow it. Makes the visit a lot more pleasant for everyone!

Answer 8

You should remove your shoes when entering someones home. I think the polite thing to do is to always offer to take off your shoes. That way if the host does not like shoes to be worn in the house they will instruct you to remove them. My house is a shoes off house and many of my friends do the same at their house. The trend is becoming increasingly common among my friends. We have had large gatherings at each others house and everyone just piles their shoes up at the door and walks around the house in socks. It really does help keep the house so much cleaner.

Answer 9

I wouldn't consider it "normal" where I live, but it isn't all that uncommon, for different reasons. I visited my sister at her home in Mass, and she asked that I remove my shoes. She had just had her hardwood floors refinished, and it was pretty costly. She keeps a basket of slippers and such for guests for when the weather is rainy, muddy, or slushy. Me, I have a 13 year old son, two cats, and a dog, and I'm married to a construction worker. My hardwood floors get refinished every day (just not in the professional sense). If they are friend's, then hey, they should be worth keeping, and to do so means walking around in your stocking feet, no matter how you are otherwise dressed. Just make sure you don't have any holes in those socks. :)

Answer 10

You don't live in a strange part of North America - removing your shoes is customary all over North America. Most people in North America remove their shoes, and expect their guests to do likewise, when entering the home. Your friends are quite correct when they say that your shoes are not clean regardless of where you've been.

Answer 11

I always remove my shoes except at a close friend's house. She asks that you keep them on because her carpet/floors are dirty because she has pets and is not a very good housekeeper.

At my house, I want people to remove their shoes. My house that I just sold was bought brand new and no one wore shoes on the carpet. I always found it rude if people would walk in and off the tiled entry way with their shoes on. I would politely ask them to remove their shoes because I had new carpet.

In my house that I just bought, the carpet is a couple of years old but it is whitish and looks brand new so once again I expect people to take their shoes off.

I think part of it is how you are raised. My husband and I were both raised in homes where you never stepped on the carpet with your shoes on. NEVER for any reason...my mom would have killed me. I don't know if it is WHERE I LIVE (Minnesota) or if it is just a trait passed down through learned/taught family behavior.