Meeting my dad?

Question

Well, I don't know my dad because he left my mom and me. And I have the chance to meet him. I don't know what to do. I mean, he's a stranger to me. And thinking about meeting him...sounds REAAAAALLY awkward. I wouldn't even know what to say to him!! (im 13 years old)

Please help me.

I talked to my mom, and she said that she doesn't mind and that it's my decision. (and it wont be my dad and I alone)

Thank you strangers SO MUCH for your advice.
I decided to see him, since this is my only opportunity, and so i'll take it.
take care!

Answer 1

I never knew my father. My Mom and he split up when I was 3 months old. He took off to Florida where his parents lived. This was during the very early 1960's. Since then, no one has heard from him or where he may be. When my Grandparents' died, he sold their home in Pompano, FL and fled with the dough ( this info was from a distant relative ). To this day, we do not know if he is alive or not. So, I think, in your situation, you should try to get to know your Dad. Yes, you will feel uncomfortable and " awkward" but, this maybe the only chance that you get. So, just be yourself !! If you don't feel that things are going relatively well, then just call your Mom. But, at least, give it a try ! I hope that this helps and Good Luck.

Answer 2

Sweetie, Every little girl NEEDS a 'Father-Figure" in her life. IF, indeed, Your Dad's absence has been..like TOTAL...he was NOT there to pay child support or to see you in the School (or Church) Christmas play, You should be cordial but DO NOT throw your heart over the cliff and expect him to be there to catch it. It seems that he ,apparently, is trying to re-establish those much needed bonds
Don't go to the meeting with pre conceived notions..Good or Bad. You have probably heard lot of things about Your Dad, relating to his absence, the reasons he left, and why, at 13 you are JUST NOW getting to meet this man. Take a lot into consideration... Things happen in a Man's Life that he has a hard time rating his priorities. After all, he's 'just' a man! Listen to his side of the storywith an open mind and Heart. Perhaps, during his absence, You May have been first in his Heart...or Last. We don't know this, but you will be able to tell by the way he treats you at your first meeting. Treat ALL Men as Strangers. But treat this man with respect until he gives you reason to truly believe he either does...or does NOT deserve YOUR Love! I wish You the very best and hope all things work out..for ALL of you.

Answer 3

My Dear kiddo: Trust me, this is really hard on your mom, after all she did, all these years....have you Thank her?, you have no idea what a single mother goes thru when abandoned by the father. You father left both of you, and now he appears in the picture???? why??? is he bringing you finally bread and milk?? this must be an offense to you...a father is the one who raises his kids, not the one who just "made" them. I am sorry to say this but probably no one will talk to you like this.
Just think about how you feel...you don't even know this man, and all of a sudden he's you Dad? whatever, me personally, I would not do it. I have nothing to say or be Thankful for, I would not hug him or kiss him with love, you know?...so what am I doing? I definitely won't go, and better hug and kiss my mom, who in reality was there for me 24/7. That's the least you can do for her............I don't care what the family say, my mom is number one.

Answer 4

The first thing to say is hi,break the ice, I can tell you this he is more afraid then you are. Ask him all those questions that you have lock in your heart. See how he reacts to you that will tell you what he feels. Some times things happen in a marriage that one is a fault, maybe your dad stayed away for a reason ASK HIM TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH. This will never be easy for you or him,take your time sit back and listen to what he has to say. You sound to me as a loving girl with a big heart use this,and wait and see what happens OK? I hope for the best for you, good luck.

Answer 5

Of course it is awkward, But he is part of you, and in the future, you will decide whether you want to have a relationship with him.

It is a fact that he and your mother had a falling out for some reason that was not your fault, and you had to be raises by someone, and it is usually the mother.

Try to take this as an oportunity to get to know someone important for your life.
Treat him as you would any one else you were meeting for the first time. Forget anything your mother has ever said about him, and judge him yourself by his actions and friendship towards you now.

Answer 6

Honey I think that you made a great decision I didnt want to see my dad after I heard I never met him when I was 6 yrs old and now we are like best friends and I am married and we talk all the time and I am so happy I did so good luck hun.

Answer 7

hey gurl, i no what ur goin thru..im 15 and i just met my dad this summer...i had the same things runnin thru my head. when u first meet him it will be a lil akward (because he basically is a stranger to u) but no that he's goin thru the same thing u are! u will both b nervous...keep in mind that u want to get to no him slowly and not all at once... dont worry about what to say to him trust me u will have tons of things to talk about and catch up on... one last reminder, dont dwell on negative things that might have happened in the past.. just think about now and the future... ull be so happy once u finally no. if this helps at all please contact me and let me no... hope this helps p.s. regardless if ur dad becomes ur new best friend or just a new person in ur life ull b glad u met him instead of wondering "what if"

Answer 8

Congratulations on taking the opportunity to meet your Father. I am sure that he is feeling just as uncertain about it as you are.In order to not feel uncomfortable about what you are going to say to him, you might want to put together a memory book of you growing-up and after bringing him up to date on your life, ask him what his life has been like. I have always found that being prepared going into a meeting gives me a great deal of confidence.
Hope you have a happy meeting with your Dad.

Answer 9

Say what you want about him, but when everything is said, he still is your father, good or bad. Just to keep yourself from regretting not meeting him ever, go and just ask him any and all questions that may be on your mind. You deserve to know the truth about everything. Imagine if you never meet him and something happens to him and you never meet. All those unanswered questions will haunt you the rest of your life.
It may hurt a little now but believe me it is well worth it.

Answer 10

Have you talked it over with your mom ? What is her opinion on you meeting your dad? My advice is for you to talk it over with her she would only have your best interest in mind. I wouldn't go alone, and I would let him do most all of the talking at first until you get more comfortable with the situation.