Last evening my 17 year old son had his girl "friend" over to hang out for a few hours. They always leave the door to the bonus room open as a rule, and when I came up to talk to them about something I walked in on her giving him a blow*job!! At first I didn't realize what was happening because they are "just friends" and I thought they were just goofing off. So I just blew it off and joked around about it a bit because my son still had his shorts on. THen he told me later when I asked if they really were doing that? Now, as I dwell on it I feel a little out of my league on this. She a nice girl if a bit ditzy, and I really didn't expect this from her. Where should I go with this? What should I say to my son? What new rules should be imposed if any? What's a mom to do?
2007-09-05 06:27:06 · 19 answers · asked by K AKarr 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Bonus Room-Extra room over the garage, FInished withcarpet, couch, TV, Computer, (my bead table for making jewelry), ours is kind of large 20x21. And just so everyone knows the girls mother requires that the door stay open wherever she is...
2007-09-08 01:18:12 · update #1
You may just want to leave this alone if the girl is 17 or older. If she is not, you should inform your son of the consent laws in your state, and that he may be violating them and could end up in bad trouble. Other than that, if you feel you do not want your son behaving like this in your house with his girlfriend, you need to lay down the rules for him.
2007-09-05 06:39:45 · answer #1 · answered by souldoctor 4 · 5⤊ 1⤋
I can't truly answer that question for you because I don't know what your family morals are. For example if you are strongly against pre-marital sex this would be a larger problem within your family unit.
However, for me personally. I would have a talk with him about how it isn't appropriate to engage in sex acts where people can just walk in. And I would explain my views on what is appropriate and what is "using" another person.
Ultimately though I am not really surprised at a 17 year old getting a ********.
2007-09-05 06:55:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 15⤊ 1⤋
It not appropriate in your house with the doors open, maybe relax the rule on the doors open policy being 17 he should be able to have it closed. You have to look at it in a positive way, he felt comfortable for it to happen in the house rather then a park bench somewhere. Maybe since he is getting older re approach the rules and let him know whats expected of him. But i wouldnt dwel on it, or they will go somewhere else to do and thats not the best either.
If you have younger kids in the house, let him have the doors shut but have rules, such as i trust you and your judgement, i dont expect you to use the house as a hotel, ect, but if its a long term girlfriend , relax the rules within reason. But if he bring a different one home every week thats not accepted.
2007-09-11 16:37:32 · answer #3 · answered by aime 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
You're the Mum, it's your call, but this is what I think.
If I was the Mother of your Son I would be furious. One, because this is going on under my roof. Two, these teens are not in a relationship together.
But then, my 17 year old brain says; I've done this before (not in my house and only while I've been in a relationship with that person). He's legal, he is nearly an adult, he can make his own decisions.
Talk to him as an adult, tell him he is responsible enough to make his own choices. Inform him of your morals, then get him some birth control.
Good luck, I'm glad you're dealing with this calmly.
2007-09-06 01:01:40 · answer #4 · answered by ★☆✿❀ 7 · 13⤊ 4⤋
I'm surprised they left the door open if they were doing that! What's a "Bonus Room" BTW for all of us non American people here that aren't familiar with that term.
2007-09-07 18:40:08 · answer #5 · answered by Jock 6 · 8⤊ 1⤋
Have a talk with your son about STDs and pregnancy. Tell her parents about what happened and suggest they talk to her too.
He's old enough now to be doing that, but that doesn't mean you can't have one last shot at instilling safe sex ideals into his head. Do your research first, and have an adult conversation with him.
Btw, I'm a 'nice girl' and you wouldn't believe the things i get up to.
If they don't do it at your house, they'll do it somewhere else. You don't want to drive him away. Tell him you'd rather they waited till they were older. But that if they insisted on doing stuff, then in your house, it must all be protected sex - including the oral sex.
2007-09-06 01:39:54 · answer #6 · answered by A derka der 7 · 9⤊ 4⤋
16 Year Old ********
2016-10-15 02:38:09 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change the name of the room. I know if I were in the "bonus" room I would be expecting some good things to happen in there. Just call it the.. "If you have sexual relations in my house, I'll turn you over to Marshall Applewhite, who will chop your unit off" room. That should fix things.
2007-09-11 13:46:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 18⤊ 0⤋
Your son is not a child, he will have sex as most humans do. tell him next time if he does this to do so somewhere else not in your home as it makes you feel uncomfortable. At 17 new rules will do no good, nor should you other than tell him not in your home. Get used to your son being human and having a sex life. I'm sure he's done more than just oral. Do not overreact or make a big deal of it, he did not have to confess anything to you.
2007-09-05 06:49:59 · answer #9 · answered by MadMike 3 · 25⤊ 3⤋
you're a woman so it's 100% possible you dont understand how your son feels during that age. It's that age where hormones rage so much sometimes it's out of control. BJs are one way of relieving tension as long as they dont do the 'real thing'.
2007-09-05 20:45:06 · answer #10 · answered by unreachablestar 1 · 12⤊ 3⤋