i love my boyfriend to death and i would do anything for him, but my family does not like him because he made some mistakes in the past and they dont want me to see him. what can i do to change the situation? should i sneak around and see him?should i let him go and see what happens?should i do what makes me happy not thinking about what mt family thinks about him?
2007-09-05 06:10:17 · 35 answers · asked by LMN 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You should never, ever lie to your family. Your family is there for you through thick and thin, and you don't know if this guy is even worth that type of sacrifice. You may love him, but also, you are blinded by that love. Love sometimes causes you to ignore the things that are right in front of you -- the bad stuff. You tend to ignore the things that family members may see very planinly. First off, listen to your family. They may know or see things that you do not see. Respect their opinon and do not fight with them. Listen to them. Secondly, do NOT sneak around with this guy. Regardless of how great he is, don't isolate yourself from your family like that. Don't lie to them. Don't ever JUST think about yourself. That type of selfish thinking will ruin relationships that you are in -- both your family and the one with your boyfriend. If you are young (still living under your parents' roof) then you really just need to listen to their rules and let things go. If you are older, paying your own bills, living by yourself, then you can make the choice by yourself, BUT be honest with your family and let them know what's going on. Never, and I mean NEVER lie to your family.
2007-09-05 06:31:43 · answer #1 · answered by One Odd Duck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand this completely because this is the exact same thing that happened to me. Okay first off the mistakes he made it can't be that bad because if he disrespected your family that is very difficult to recover from but not impossible. Also, I believe you might want to try to expertiment with other people not necessarily dating but going out to the movies with friends because that way you will truly see that you love him or was he just there for a short period of time? However, if you know that you want to be with this person for the rest of your life then you shouldn't sneak you have to tell your family many times that you love him and that is that. Remember there is no guarantee your parents will say yes to your demands because with me I got lucky after disrespecting my gf's parents. I learned my lesson and then I apologize sincerely, I took them all out to a nice dinner and we are now back together. Remember even if you get him back again it will take time for you guys to get another date because your family would have to get use to him again. Okay try to keep him but if not I'm sorry it had to end this way.
2007-09-05 06:26:59 · answer #2 · answered by Roger P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, do what makes you happy, depending on your age. If you are too young for a boyfriend, don't. They are only doing it for your protection, if you are old enough, then you may be overlooking the fact that they are only looking out for your best interest, and may have cause for worry. If his mistake is minor and you feel comfortable, then don't, but if you feel like your second thoughts might be valid, then leave him alone, and then if you guys meet up later at any point in your life, then you should see him then, see how much he has changed, and start something w/him. I hope you are happy either way.
GOd bless.
2007-09-05 06:18:19 · answer #3 · answered by ilovelilPhof 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think that you shouldn't let him go if you guys love each other so much. Everybody is making mistakes and really important think is to take some lesson from it. You should definitely talk to your family and try to explain them that he means a lot for you just like them - he is not asking you to stop seeing your family so they shouldn't ask you to stop seeing them.
2007-09-05 06:19:09 · answer #4 · answered by MARTA O 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u love him that much u shud do what best for both of you, as its just your familys opinion of him. If it can work out it might help to explain to him about your familys thought this might make him more aware of how to treat them or make him more confident and stop him making mistakes... At the end of the day its your relationship so whatever makes you both happy
2007-09-05 06:17:03 · answer #5 · answered by KUSHANATOR 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a tough question. From my experience, my family has always been right, they can see things while we are "blinded" by love. On the other hand, sometimes no one is good enough for a family member. I say do what makes you happy, but don't be blind, keep your eyes open to what they are seeing.
2007-09-05 06:14:59 · answer #6 · answered by Sarah Smile 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are <23 years old, your family is probably right.
Notice that I don't know anything about your family, your boyfriend, his mistakes, or you. And I'm still willing to say that emphatically.
A leopard cannot change his spots. Time for a new boyfriend.
2007-09-05 06:15:55 · answer #7 · answered by LuckyLavs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a parent, I'd have to say 'what kind of mistakes?'
Parents are right more than we like to think, because they've already faced most issues younger people face and have the experience of living and learning through those.
I would say, talk to your parents. Tell them how you feel about him and that you want to keep seeing him. Depending on the 'mistakes', tell them you are aware of them and also of your parents concern. Tell them how you feel about him and want to see where the relationship goes, but that you are also being careful and taking care of yourself. Then make sure you are doing that! Talk to them without it getting emotional - try to see their side as well, WITHOUT seeing it as only them trying to stop something that you want.
Good luck to you!
2007-09-05 06:17:28 · answer #8 · answered by nite_angelica 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him go... maybe later in your life you two can get back together. When you move out, go to college, etc, you can do whatever you want. Honor your parents and don't sneak around... you'll just end up getting pregnant (which is more cruel to the child than cute for you).
2007-09-05 06:15:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sneaking around and not thinking about what your family thinks only works for a little while, it will all catch up to you. So do yourself a favor and end it now instead of wasting precious years
2007-09-05 06:14:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋