in turn lead to infidelity?Since you don't know what you're missing and aren't happy with what you've got aren't you even more likely to stray than if you had something to compare your spouse's performance to?I'm really glad than I didn't wait and "shopped around" so to say before settling down.Why anyone would willigly deprive themselves of one f the best things in life is beyond me.
2007-09-05 04:27:54 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Not necessarily.
If you're committed to marital infidelity, you have an obligation to MAKE the sexual relationship with your spouse as good as it can be, and that is true even if you didn't wait until your wedding night. So if you see your spouse isn't satisfied, you try to make it better so that your spouse is fulfilled...and your spouse ought to be doing the same for you.
Really, it's only the people who have "prior experience" who can compare their spouses to other partners, and therefore, they are the only ones who can be dissatisfied. A person who has only had sex with one other person isn't putting themselves in that position of comparing and judging the "performance" of their spouse...which is, well, ICK. I don't want to be judging my husband's sexual performance! I want to be ENJOYING it and making sure he's enjoying that time with me, too.
If you don't mind me saying, I think your focus sounds too much like, "What's in it for me?" and "I want it to be good for me!" You haven't said ANYthing about making it good for your spouse, and IMHO, that's the trouble with premarital sexual activity. You look at sex as what you GET instead of what you GIVE.
If both spouses are totally focussed on GIVING in sex, it's going to be a great experience, no matter what.
Couples who wait look upon their own sexuality as a gift to their spouses...a wedding gift. The attitude tends to be different. There may be exceptions, especially in this day and age when society has conditioned all of us to think of sex as getting our own jollies and not what sex is REALLY all about -- love-giving and life-giving unity. But overall, if you're willing to put aside your own needs -- yes, deprive yourself -- for the sake of absolute fidelity to your marriage vows (no cheating by having sex with somebody who isn't your spouse) , then you are definitely going to get things started in the right direction.
2007-09-05 04:46:47 · answer #1 · answered by sparki777 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, if you are really in love with that person. The sex will be the best b/c yall are into each other. Sex has gotten so overrated these days and it's never really about satisfying that person to the utmost. It's about getting a jump-off these days. I have been waiting and I always hear questions like this. But I've been with my spouse for 2yrs now and I know when that day comes, it will be good because I know what he likes and want so I will give it to him. Just like you would know what your girl likes, you give it to her so she will be happy. There is nothing different on if you just wait until you're married. you have to explore that person, learn them. I've had many chances to sleep with folks but it would have been just sex and i'm not into that. You should really love a person before intercourse.
"think before you speak"
Nesha!
2007-09-05 04:39:32 · answer #2 · answered by GNJ 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, shopping around works... so long as the partner you decide to settle down with is better than the rest. But what if you sleep with a guy whose hung like a shirehorse but then have to settle down with a guy whose hung like a miniature carrot? Even if you love the second guy, and he treats you like a princess, are you honestly not gonna still fantasise about the first guy?
If you only sleep with one person then there's a lotta trust there - you're giving them your virginity, and you're taking theirs, there is a mutual responsibility. Furthermore, you will always think that they are the greatest lover on the planet - so you got to screw a few other people, but which is better, having a back-log that comes compleate with a reputation as a slag or spending your entire life feeling like you're married to a sex God?
2007-09-05 04:45:24 · answer #3 · answered by Pebbles 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How would you know that it was not the best in the world if you have not experienced others? Sex is a gift from God meant to be shared between a man and his wife. I don't know I think it is a sacred thing. I think that there would be less divorce if not any, if people would only practice this one biblical law. Sex outside of marriage is forbidden, it's not a suggestion.
2007-09-05 04:38:26 · answer #4 · answered by fire_side_2003 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Then again, if they've never had sex before this one person, they'll never truly know what they're missing out on. I always find it interesting when I read about people who waiting until marriage and they claim sex is not really all it cracked up to be.
Oh well, their loss. I don't care what they do.
2007-09-05 04:37:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Actually, one of the best things in life is a woman (or man) who is so devoted to you that she (or he) was willing to wait until she (he) found the one she (he0 wanted to spend the rest of her (his) life with before giving all of herself (himself) to her (his) spouse.
Also, having no other sex partners her (his) spouse will never have to wonder if he (she) is being comapred to others.
If you are basing a satisfying marriage primarily on satisfying sex, you are headed for a divorce.
2007-09-05 04:38:10 · answer #6 · answered by Sldgman 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
NO!
In fact its very much the other way around.
If you stay true to your spouse before marriage, you're more apt to stay faithful to them long after.
People just want to find some pathetic excuse to screw around free of any responsibility.
2007-09-05 04:35:42 · answer #7 · answered by Linda J 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
It also leads to people jumping into marriage before they are ready, and then having to divorce later. No wonder the Bible belt states have such a high divorce rate.
2007-09-05 04:35:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 2⤋
well if you really love someone enough to marry them you should want to please them better then anyone else in the world .thats love and with love comes things you wouldn't believe you were able to do.i know i'm real good because i like pleaseing i'm full of love want some.no but waiting can be good .i didn't .
2007-09-05 04:42:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
if you have not had sex before your marriage night then you won't have anything to compare it with, so what would you be unhappy about?
even bad sex is better than no sex at all.
2007-09-05 04:34:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋