Three old mischievous Grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home.
About then an old Grandpa walked by, and one of the old Grandma's yelled out saying, "We bet we can tell l exactly how old you are.
" The old man said, "There ain't no way you can guess it, you old fools."
One of the old Grandmas said, "Sure we can! Just drop your under shorts and we can tell your exact age."
Embarrassed just a little, he dropped his drawers.
The Grandmas asked him to turn around a couple of times, asked him to
jump up and down for a little while and then they all piped up and said,
"You're 84 years old!"
"How in the world did you guess?"
The old Grandmas snickered and laughed.
Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, all three happily yelled in unison,
"Because we were at your birthday party yesterday."
2007-09-05 04:06:44 · 30 answers · asked by MYKLIA G 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
LMSUIAO You weren't supposed to tell everyone my age, traitor
2007-09-05 04:13:35 · answer #1 · answered by Jim Jnr M 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Funny
2007-09-05 04:10:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bonjour madam
lol
hers one:
The Smiths had no children and decided to use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr.Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon".
Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning madam. You don't know me but I've come to...."
"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.
"Really ?" the photographer asked.
"Well, good! I've made a specialty of babies."
"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat. Just where do we start?" asked Mrs. Smith, blushing.
"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too; you can really spread out."
"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me."
"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results."
"I hope we can get this over with quickly," gasped Mrs. Smith.
"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure."
"Don't I know!!", Mrs. Smith exclaimed.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London."
"Oh my god!!", Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
"And these twins turned out exceptionally well when you consider their mother
was so difficult to work with." The photographer handed Mrs. Smith
the picture. "She was difficult ?" asked Mrs. Smith. "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look."
"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
"Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three hours too.
The mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate.
Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually chewed on your, eh......equipment ?". "That's right. Well madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so that we can get to work." "Tripod??", Mrs. Smith
looked extremely worried now. "Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold while I'm getting ready for action.
Madam? Madam?.....
Good Lord, she's fainted !!"
aurevoir
2007-09-05 07:06:12 · answer #3 · answered by jam 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Yes that one was funny that was a great joke lol lol rofl oh boy you got a star for that one lol can't wait to show my mother lol
2007-09-05 04:15:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's no joke... It's a prediction....Myklia will be up there with her 2 friends just like that someday!!!
2007-09-05 19:06:59 · answer #5 · answered by Mind-waster 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thank you for that charming mental image. I swear I'm not scarred at all.
2007-09-05 05:18:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol woman are so mean im happy i get to be a woman !!!star 4 u
2007-09-05 04:31:27 · answer #7 · answered by ☆STAR☆ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lmao could just see u sat there when you are older doing that you sly woman you lol
2007-09-05 23:55:14 · answer #8 · answered by lolalush 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i bet one of them is u just kidding that was funny.
2007-09-05 04:21:29 · answer #9 · answered by 2 guitars and 1 amb 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Haha, mean old ladies.
2007-09-05 04:13:02 · answer #10 · answered by HopeGrace 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋