this is sort of a self esteem issue...?

Question

According to some people, they say I'm attractive, so this has nothing to do with appearance. But I always seem to try so hard for people to like me. I respect everyone around me, am nice to everyone and always try to listen when they speak. but I feel like I get left out when for example co-workers dont invite me to go out with the group for drinks, or want my phone #. What should I do to get invited or feel accepted!

Answer 1

Try to be more confident and find YOU ARE HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF! Loving and accepting ourselves is THE MOST CRITICAL FACTOR in experiencing joy,happiness, and success in life. When you really love yourself and you really love other people, you find that life is really an incredible journey where things flow, and no matter what happens you always find a way to enjoy yourself and you feel fulfilled. You MUST love yourself completely.
This determines your STANDARDS for what you are willing to accept or settle for. It determines how well you treat your body and your health, how much money you feel you deserve to earn or feel you can make, your belief in whether you can achieve your goals, how much others RESPECT you and how they treat you, and even whether people like you and want to be around you. People love being around confident people. You see, confident people do not feel the need to judge you or tear you down in order to elevate their own self-worth. They radiate a positive energy. You feel safe around them. You need to consistently and confidently take action to move towards your goals, and towards your ultimate destiny. People who lack in confidence often get ‘stuck’. So you see, your entire DESTINY is shaped by your degree of confidence. True self-confidence comes from an absolute sense of certainty deep within, that you are able to handle anything life throws your way. Truly confident people exude calm, control, power, certainty. They care about people, and they make people feel good when they are around them.They never brag – after all, actions speak louder than words. People who brag are just masking their insecurities. People have varying degrees of confidence depending on what activity they are performing. For example, someone might be totally confident in performing a piano concert, or driving a car, but feel totally inadequate at a new job they’ve started, or at flirting with members of the opposite sex. People with Total Self-Confidence, though, have complete belief in themselves. They never ask themselves “Can I really do this? What if this doesn’t work out? Am I good enough to pull it off?” They know that if they really want something, and they are committed to getting it, it will happen. They know that it’s just a question of time until they’ve mastered the skills and knowledge to make whatever they want a reality

Answer 2

Have you invited them? Find a cool place they may not have gone to and as you are picking up your purse, nonchalantly mention that you are going for a drink at "Georgia's", a really interesting place you like, and would they care to come along? Be prepared to get a "Well, we made other plans...." then you smile and keep right on walking. Never let 'em see you sweat. Next time, they may want to go with you, or they might ask if you would like to join them. But, you are much more likely to get invitations if you are thought to have some type of life (a little mystery...and I don't mean GET WEIRD...) just a little aloofness. Niceness will never cut it. You will be viewed as a pushover. I am not suggesting you ever are rude, but you are protective of your space and your time.
People are really not wanting to hook up with another bloodsucker that they have to babysit. They would rather be around someone with laughter and ideas and adventure.
If this is not you, develop yourself.
You are only going to get one chance at doing this thing called life right.

Answer 3

You are the old me!!
Turn your thinking around, NOT do they like me, but DO I LIKE THEM!!?!!
Don't try to get people to like you. Not everyone's going to like you anyway.
You are the one that listens to the boring git at a party because you feel sorry for them. Stop listening to the boring git, politely excuse yourself and go have fun. No one knows how great you are because you are always worrying about everyone else, well worry about yourself.
You care about other people and their feelings, that's a wonderful trait, but, care about you and your feelings.
I changed my ways and got the invites and with that came confidence. Remember you are worth being around!!!
Ask yourself constantly, am I having fun, if the answers yes, great, if not, go do something that will make you say yes.
You are wonderful, but please stop taking yourself so seriously. I wish you all the best.

Answer 4

Perhaps they don't think you're interested, because you're always waiting to be invited. Why don't you suggest going out for drinks next time, and invite everybody? Or when other people are going, ask one or two of them if you can come along? I'm sure they'd love to have you join them.

Answer 5

Maybe you should initiate the going out for drinks group....take charge and mention you are going to 'such and such' local hang out and ask certain individuals out there...put yourself in the lead role as opposed to the role of waiting to be asked to go. Make yourself a part of the action instead of waiting for someone to include you in the action...hope it helps, email me if you need to speak further

Answer 6

Keep being yourself mos def.ly , but to get them to invite you make sure that they know you love to parttttttttty!!!
Talk about getting drunk and how much you go out and how much fun you had last night things like that!
Or lets say you are in a conversation and they are talking about goin out for that night innocently say hey man where you guys going I could sure use a freaking drink!

Answer 7

Ask why you are excluded, ask the one that is closest to you.

But I can say, drinking friends are not friends really. You should do other things that do not involve alcohol or partying.

Answer 8

Don't try so hard. Be yourself. Become more confident in yourself, not worrying what other's think of you, don't be so self conscious. Be more natural.

Answer 9

make the first move or invite them to places first.

Answer 10

This will sound strange but people like you better if have flaws. They hate to be with people who may be better than them. Don't know why. So have more problems and they will be like you more.