I'm in love with a guy of a different religion... he doesn't want to ruin our relationship... what should I do

Question

I am best friends with this guy that has been there for me through thick and thin... he is always hugging me and telling me he loves me... I'm sure he means it in a friendly way... but I have feelings for him. I am a non denominational christian and a worship leader at my church... and he is a Latter Day Saint.

I didn't start out loving him... or even liking him in that way. We have been best friends since the very start and it is because of that and all that I know about him that I started to fall for him. Help me know what to do with all of this.

Answer 1

There are huge issues related to religion and relationships. Ask yourself: Will you give up your denomination (not necessarily faith) to be with him? Would he do the same? If the answer to one of those questions is "yes," then you have to face it, it's not going to happen. Religion can put a very serious set of moral and relationship codes down for two people; it can also dictate very specific roles for people, lifestyles, and practices. Sometimes they can merge together; sometimes they cannot.
My question to you is whether your faith is derived from dogma and practices (i.e. what your church says is right) or whether it's derived from your personal experience with God, and whether you think you could express your faith through the vehicle of LDS. Maybe you should just get to know more about LDS and make that decision.

The other thought is-- if you're in high school, or even in college, changes are that this relationship isn't going to last. If you want to date, date. Realize that you're not committing to marrying anyone just by going to the movies and splitting a pizza (and maybe the occasional makeout session). Then, you get to know the real person, and can see whether the religion is insurmountable or whether it's just a difference that you two have to work out.

---
EDIT--
Your relationship is NOT a mission nor a decipleship decree. DO NOT go into the relationship to "change" him (on his religion or on anything else for that matter). You can TALK about your religion, you can WITNESS to the extent that you need to or are called, but you're not going to "save a soul" by dating a guy--all you'll do then is just drive a religious wedge between you and you'll never salvage your friendship.

Answer 2

Tell him how you feel. If you guys have a strong friendship, even if you dont work out as a couple you should be able to get through it and still be friends. Tell him that you think you have feelings for him, maybe don't go all out and tell him you're in love him with him, but let him know you truely care about him. Tell him WHY you have these feelings for him, like the certain qualities he has that makes you feel for him, and the reasons you think you would be good together. Then ask him what he thinks about you two ever being more then friends. Make sure he knows theres no pressure. About the two religions, at least you two are both very religious, thats a good thing. Mormons aren't too completely different then Christians, at least he doesn't practice Wicca or something! Tell him you don't think thats an issue you need to address right now, if you guys are meant to be together you would be able to work that too. I think that you should definitely talk to him tho or else you will always wonder what could have happened if y ou had. Good luck I hope everything works out!

Answer 3

Religion is one of the more difficult obstacles to most romances; however , I believe you can overcome this problem if the love, desire, understanding, and will is there.The fact that you are both Christians and you are non-denominational makes the odds of success better in your case.First, let him know how you feel and find out if he likes you romantically.If he does not ,then everything else becomes moot.But if he likes you in that way, then the both of you have to sit down to discover if your respective faiths will allow you to date and how.I am positive that it will and does.Today, you have Christians and Moslem's getting married much less Christians, albeit of different denominations.I suggest you don't give up provided this guy loves and wants you;and I wish you all the best. Keep us posted on your progress.

Answer 4

Hi , to be honest, this is a very difficult situation to be in. I was in a similar one with a Muslim. I am also a non-denominational Christian. I went into it thinking that i could change them and hopefully start taking them to my church and God would to the rest, but sometimes it doesn't always work that way. We are no longer together, and i don't think they were God's best for me. You may want to ask if he is open to attending your Church first. If he is, and wants to regularly, then just pray about it...

Answer 5

It's ok! I'm actually LDS myself. :) It's ok, many people do it. It's somewhat discouraged, but doesn't matter that much. You can certainly still date him, and even have a wedding and have kids and such. If you really want to, you can tell him that you want to see the missionaries and he can arrange them to come over and give you some lessons of the church. But it's not nessesary. Just go for it like you would with anyone else, but don't expect to have sex before marriage or for him to drink alcohol or go to the movies on Sunday, that's all. :)

BTW, I'm happy that you are respecting him. We don't get that a lot, you sound like a very nice woman. :)

Answer 6

My ex husband is Mormon and I am Methodist. Although its not why we broke up. It wasn't a factor at all. I would sit down and have a talk with him. You two need to decide a level of appropriateness for your relationship. If he wants to pursue a romantic relationship with you, he needs to know how you feel about his religion and what if anything you are willing to put up with from their church. Mormons are very nice people (at least the ones I know). Good luck to you.

Answer 7

That does not sound familiar at all..
You don't just start liking someone..You either do or don't from begining to end...
Check this out chica, I liked my boyfriend when I first met him but, the more we hung around the more I seen him trying to impress me, Or the way he would put so much energy in bieng another person to please me and/or what I wanted him to be JUST had me furious. That alone made me sick... You don't grow to like anyone you learn to act....You either like from the start or don't..

Answer 8

Your religions are not that much different. I had a very long and happy marriage with a man with a different religious belief.

Answer 9

Well....... just be best friends. I am a muslim and i used to like a hindu girl, but it didnt work out. She just stayed my friend.

Answer 10

I hate to have to break it to you, but Mormons are NOT Christians. The Mormon religion teaches that they will eventually become gods, among ohter things! Best to not become unequally yoked!!!