I think I'm in love with a very good friend of mine but he doesn't feel the same way about me. We act like were a "couple" all the time but he's made it clear that we're "just friends". We spend almost everyday together, enjoying each others company but as soon as his ex comes back in the picture he acts completely different. He is so hot and cold with me and I don't know what to do. I've recently told him straight up how I feel towards him and he's been very considerate of my feelings up to this point but I but I don't know how to make him understand that I want more out of our friendship.
2007-09-04 05:46:28 · 34 answers · asked by miss954 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OH LORD..........
2007-09-04 05:49:37 · answer #1 · answered by lialove_18 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
.He seems like he wants to have his cake and eat it to, like most guys. It's like you are playing substitute for his ex, ya know, and that is not fair to you. I understand your position, and the fact that you want to be with him, but if he is still not stepping up, then what can you do? You can't continue to play second string, and I think it's very commendable that he has been considerate of your feelings, but yet and still he hasn't done anything to make you think he is going to give you what you want. It's no fun loving someone who doesn't love you back. I say if you can't just be his friend, if you feel like these feelings you have for him are going to complicate the friendship, you may have to take a break from it for a while. If you continue to hang out with him, knowing that you want to be with him and the feeling isn't mutual, you are the one who is going to be hurt by the outcome. His heart is obviously else where, so maybe you should make an effort to find someone outside of him to try and have a decent relationship with, someone who will care for you and love you in the way that you deserve, not just when it is convenient.
2007-09-12 05:48:46 · answer #2 · answered by Sweetie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can love who ever you want...but dont always expect that other person feels the same way towards you.....i believe that we love someone sooo much that we are hoping that one day they will feel the same so we just hold on and hold on in case one of them days they will feel the same. and when they dont feel the same way and find someone new then we go into the jealousy stage and try to figure out what they have that you dont...but its good you told him how you feel but yet you took a high chance at loosing his friendship and making him feel uncomfortable. and you could end up together sometime down the road but dont get excited over the thought. just lay back and let him make up his mind and maybe someday he might say " i finally realize that i do love you" and want to be with you.......lovers are great when they are friends first.
2007-09-04 05:54:36 · answer #3 · answered by $martA$$.com 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you can make it any more obvious if you have come straight out with it.. I think mabey you want it so badly that you think he will change his mind about you but I think if it was mutual you would already be a couple. I would say put some distance between you if that doesnt make him realize that he may want more fromyou as well, then he really just wants to remain friends and you cant force him to love you back in that way so I would keep that distance and try to let your feelings for him go. good luck.
2007-09-04 05:54:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love him then you'll wait until he comes around. sometimes it takes time for a guy to realize what he has right in front of him. Since you already told him how you feel then just give him time to digest that. It's great that he's being considerate of your feelings and that your still good friends. He just may not be ready yet. You could talk to him more about it. If he's kinda on the fence maybe you could try giving him more hints that you want more then a "just friends" relationship. Be there for him. Give him time. It'll work out.
2007-09-04 05:56:02 · answer #5 · answered by jose 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are tired of being his friend and want more but couldnt say..... try leaving him or ignore him for a few days. If he notices and misses your sudden distance he'll go after you and ask the reason of your sudden coldness then that's the time unconsciously he likes you and that may be your cue to be frank to him and tell him how you feel and that you'd rather stay away from him than expect something more to happen in your relationship.
2007-09-12 00:34:18 · answer #6 · answered by Mystic Victoria 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How many ways does he have to tell you he only wants to be friends? You said he has made it clear. Do you just want to put him on the spot and set yourself up for more rejection?
He apparently has a thing going for his ex. Until he resolves that issue one way or another, you are exactly what he wants you to be - a friend. To try and push him into something else may only push him away all together.
2007-09-12 04:20:07 · answer #7 · answered by drewxjacobs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you dont have a chance as long as he has a gf. I would say just be a good friend to him. Who knows what the future holds!!! If you find it difficult to just be friends, then perhaps you need time away from him. The way I see it is that it is only you who could end up getting hurt in this friendship.
2007-09-12 00:01:39 · answer #8 · answered by Dreamyraj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is clear that he probably does have some sort of feelings for you but he also wants to keep the door open for his ex. I am not too sure how it ended with them but I do not think he is the one who ended it. Don't take it personal sweetie he obviously loves to hang out with you just be there for him hopefully when he gets over his ex things will change for you guys ;)"
2007-09-12 05:17:10 · answer #9 · answered by ღKrissyღ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Please tell him to stop playing games and if he's not feeling the same then he should stop acting one way and then different. He probably still has feelings for his ex (which usually happens) so there's nothing else you can do, you need to give him time to think and decide (if he has something to decide). If he prefers to keep acting distant, then move on. You don't need to suffer and you don't deserve your heart broken.
Good luck!!
2007-09-12 05:01:44 · answer #10 · answered by bloodymary24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice...do not spend all your day long with him, that will hurt you because you have feelings for him; sometimes when you let the people take their space they will miss you...and I do not know why, but I think in these case that is exactly what will happen. He will notice your empty space around him and he will then realize he has some feelings he didn´t know existed...you will see
2007-09-12 03:06:28 · answer #11 · answered by staytrue 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋