THE “RULES OF THE SOUTH” are as follows?

Question

THE “RULES OF THE SOUTH” ARE AS FOLLOWS

1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
2. Turn your cap right, your head isn’t crooked.
3. Let’s get this straight; it’s called a “gravel road.” I drive a pickup truck because I want to. No matt how slow you drive, you’re going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
4. They care cattle. That’s why they smell to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don’t like it? I-20 goes ease and west, I-75 goes north and south. Pick one.
5. So you have a $60,000 car. We’re impressed. We have $250,000 cotton strippers that are driven only 3 wks a yr.
6. So every person in the south waves. It’s called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.
7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of doves are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don’t have it up to your ear at the time.
8. Yeah, we eat catfish and crawfish. You really want sushi, caviar? It’s available at the corner bait shop.
9. The “Opener” refers to the first day of deer season. It’s a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.
10. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
11. No, there’s no “vegetarian special” on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order the Chefs Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey.
12. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, veggies, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup!
13. You bring “coke” into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring “Mary Jane” into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
14. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.
15. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don’t hit the water hazards it spooks the fish.
16. Colleges? We have them all over. We have State Universities, Universities, and Vo-tech. They come outta there with an education plus a love for GOD, and country, and they still wave at everybody when they come for the holidays.
17. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines. So don’t mess with us. If you do, you will get whipped by the best.
18. The south is the greatest!! If you are from the south you are part of the best people in the USA!!

Answer 1

hey, i am from the South and i stand up when the national anthem is played. also when DIXIE is played. i love what you posted here. will show every one Southern Pride and our way of living. i have received this on my e-mail and did NOT delete it. MORE POWER TO YOU. long wave the STARS AND BARS!!!!!

Answer 2

WAY TO GO!! These are great. My sister is from the north and when her and her husband came to visit she asked me about the waving thing. They was so surprised that everybody waved...lol. Had to tell her people are just friendly and wave at everybody. My daughter uses ketchup on everything and my husband claims thats how you tell if somebody is a true southerner....lol. And the cell ringing when doves coming in?? Priceless!! Have a star!! :)

Answer 3

I was once called a Half back while I was living in South Carolina a few months ago! I asked what that was and the lady said to me-Where were you born I said in PA. and then she asked me where was I raised I said in FL. And then she said where are you living now? I said in SC she said see it is half way back to PA LOL. Now I live back in FL (I know Florida isnt consider the south but hey I Love it here the "South" was way to much for me to handle!)

Answer 4

You GO Lucy Jo! That about sums it all up, except for a fourth spice I would add. Louisiana Hot Sauce!

Answer 5

Woo Hoo! Mississippi here! I totally agree!!!

Answer 6

Usually, that's too long for me. I consider it depends on the guy and his face though. Certain guys may pull off long hair and other people can't.

Answer 7

AMEN!!
I would add 1 thing though, Mary Jane better know how to cook!!!

Answer 8

I'm from the south, get a life that you like. Live and let live, that's the ticket.

Answer 9

My husband is from the South....and yes, they are good people!

Answer 10

Very nice, but you forgot one.

"We do NOT talk funny. What about those folks from NYC?"