I don't know how to word this but I like to party a lot. You know dance, drink, beer pong. lol But at the end of the day I want a b/f. All of my friends are married or engaged and their men tell them they are not allowed to see me anymore due to my partying. But I mean I JUST turned 20 last week. Isn't it healthy to party a little?
But I do want to get into a relationship with someone but I am picky, they have to be smart, going somewhere and there has to be some attraction as well.
Is this to much to ask? Is there really any good men out there any more?
2007-09-03 21:18:34 · 29 answers · asked by boston_tiffany 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just as an Add on.. I am 20, have my own business and am going to college full time. Double majoring in business and marketing. I am very independant and I am going somewhere. But I like to loosen up on Fri and Sat nights with a little partyin. So does that make me some bad person... NO
2007-09-03 21:40:33 · update #1
there are...
but they all already have boyfriends
2007-09-03 21:24:44 · answer #1 · answered by Chuck 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yep there are a few good men... but you're looking for them in the wrong places. Most partiers aren't "going somewhere".. .it's the guys that are busy doing other things that are getting ahead. I mean, partying is good once in a while, but if it defines your life, then that's all you'll be good for.
No one parties because it's "healthy", we party because it's fun (At least that's why I party). In fact, too much partying is decidedly unhealthy. It's all about balance and moderation.
It sounds like your friends have found some pretty lame-*** abusively controlling men. You're better off without them. It's good that you're picky... it shows that you want a relationship that is worth something. I hope you find a good match.
2007-09-04 04:46:10 · answer #2 · answered by Solarcide 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are tons of good men. It comes back to you. What are you looking for in a guy when you go out to meet them? Think about the things you want right now as opposed to the things you will want a few years down the road. Some things are the same but some are different. You have to take some chances with some toads, so to speak. I am an attractive guy with an amazing personnality and a decent job. When I was your age, girls saw me as the marrying type and stayed away from me because THAT night they were just looking for fun. Now, at 38 years old, every ex that I have is dissapointed that I am married and when I run into girls that I would have killed for back in high school they are now comming on to me. Figure out how to invest your feelings in a long termer.
2007-09-04 04:29:30 · answer #3 · answered by nvr10pts 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well you're not old enough to drink legally & some percieve excess partying as slutty. Chill out you have time. Also you're not alone trying to find a decent man maybe you're looking in the wrong place. Try somewhere other than a bar. You could, like so many jerks tell me, be meeting the wrong men. There must be something wrong if all your friends' husbands or fiances don't want them around you. Maybe they're afraid they'll end up in jail or gang raped! It doesn't make you a bad person but you're priorities are off. You could be "loosening up" too much!
2007-09-04 04:24:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a man that has dated girls that like to party, I would advise you to get the partying out of your system before you try to find a serious boyfriend. A man that is smart and going somewhere (which is what you are looking for) probably isn't going to be into the party scene, like you are. This will mean that you will be going out to party a lot while your boyfriend will not be going with you. This will lead to jealousy and fights...in short, no fun.
By all means, go out and have fun, but you should probably hold off on finding a serious relationship until you are ready to settle down.
2007-09-04 04:32:54 · answer #5 · answered by pullman_wa_1968 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yeah there are good guys. I am one, but I would say I am average not too smart I have corney insightful moments I am trying to get my life together and get a home of my own. I doubt I would fall under your Ideal guy.
The truth is sometimes it can be too much to ask, being too picky will lower your chances of finding the right guy. But give it time, don't go after somebody cause they are smart or going anywhere (this doesn't mean go after a total bum) you will find the right guy and you might be surprised to find, the guy who might not be your Ideal guy is smarter, more fun to be around and down the line you may find he is going somewhere.
But hey come on, your 20 have fun. you'll find somebody, just may take time. Good luck and hope I was able to help you out.
2007-09-04 04:34:19 · answer #6 · answered by demirall 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You are looking for mr. perfect right, well how perfect are you if you can answer this honestly you are on your way to getting the perfect person. The thing is that you have already put in your mind what kind of person you have in mind but the problem is that with this attitude it will be difficult for you to find one because if the person comes across you, you will not have the opportunity to know him, because it is never written on the fore head, it could even among the people you are partying with, it is only when you get to know them you will be able to find out. So your step to get your mr. perfect is to give a chance to who ever is interested in you that you can tolerent and get to know them better from there you are likely to get your soulmate, i am not saying just go get in to relationship with all the jack and harry, what i mean is that dont judge the people without knowing them. akind of trail can convince you. good luck.
2007-09-04 04:41:08 · answer #7 · answered by zainab gangaali 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
are you sure you want a good man or someone who can tolerate ur partying. ask yourself how much u are willing to sacrifice to get what u want. the good guys are probably skipping u because they want someone with a head over her shoulder, and ur description does not fit that category at all. So maybe it will help to try and cut down on the partying and do a little growing up. I bet u gonna find the person you are looking for. IM me if u have anymore questions. good luck to u, lady
2007-09-04 04:28:49 · answer #8 · answered by Max 77 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's not, it's just that most women are too retarded to recognize one, let alone know what to do with one. I see girls go for crap all the time while a good guy is standing right in front of them and then they rant how there aren't any good guys around. But the fact is most women don't want a good guy no matter what they say. Otherwise they wouldn't chase the losers. Makes alot of decent guys give up on a lost cause and just be a d*ck. I had to go through alot of retards as an asshole before I met my current girlfriend who actually wanted to be treated right so I could be myself again.
2007-09-04 04:23:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
You have nearly answered your own question.
The "good guys" are not out partying. They are off studying, working, etc. and if you spend most of your time partying, the "good guys" will conclude that you aren't a match for them and their interests.
Don't get me wrong-- there's a time and place for bars and clubs. You can meet a lot of cool people at these locations. However, they are mostly there to facilitate hookups between people interested in short-term relationships. If you hang out there, guys will assume that you aren't ready for a serious relationship, and still want to play the field. If you want something permanent, then you just have to spend time looking for men at graduate school, in business, or similar places.
Better still, improve yourself, and you will start to attract higher quality men to match.
Good luck!
2007-09-04 04:34:47 · answer #10 · answered by Marc M 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Most of the good ones are taken. the have women who are "smart, going somewhere" The good ones probably don't do to much partying and Beer ponging.
2007-09-04 04:30:37 · answer #11 · answered by D Guru 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋