I need help with talking to women?

Question

I'm 19 and very shy. I'm starting college in Oct. and I get very nervous around big crowds. I'm worse when I'm around a girl I like. Sometimes I can't say the right thing or I can't come up with anything to say. To make matters worse I only seem to find asian girls the most attractive. I have met a few girls of a different race that I have found attractive, but it asian girls have always made me studder. What can I do to help build my confidence around girls I find attractive?

Answer 1

i get nervous in crowds too, but i'm a little older than you and am no longer nervous around women i like. my advice: talk to them as if they were just another person, no matter how attractive they are. don't put them on a pedestal and don't worry about always saying something cool or witty. just be yourself...sounds like something your mom would say, i know, but it's true.

if it's hard to talk to girls, just start chatting up ugly ones, just for practice. you won't feel much pressure. then move on to better looking ones, then chat up babes. work your way up. you don't have to *date* the ugly ones, just use them for practice about how to talk to a girl.

when you talk to a girl, be relaxed, laid back, nonchalant, pleasant, and make lots of eye contact. that projects confidence. women love confidence and it's probably the biggest component of attraction.

Answer 2

Try just asking something simple at first, kind of an ice breaker. You could pretend to be late for class and stop her for a moment to ask if she knows the time. After she tells you what time it is, say "thanks, I owe you one" and go on to your class. That will leave her wondering what you meant and who you are? The next time you see her, casually say hi. If she remembers you as the guy that "owes her one" from the other day...your in good with her and all you have to do is just stay calm and be yourself. You have already peaked her interest since she is still willing to talk to you. The thing you owe her could be anything you want to make it be...take her to lunch or buy her a coffee or soda. Take the time to ask her about herself and if she does most of the talking then you don't have to worry about your studdering problem. Just remember that studdering can be controlled by slowing down your thoughts, calming yourself down and breathing evenly, focusing on what you want to say, and then saying it. Good luck, hope this works for you.

Answer 3

You sound like a good guy...A couple of hints for you.........What have you EVER learned in your life by talking? You only learn by listening and observing.
Women love guys who LISTEN to them !..They hit a certain point when they've
"heard it all" and are pretty much bored with listening to some clown expounding on his ego............Try NOT talking but asking questions... There's not many women out there who are at a loss for words.
Where are you from, what do you do?
What are your future plans? Do you like sweet better than salt! Anything!....It's very easy to get a woman yakking.
Intelligent questions (not stupid boring ones) should help you...............
Asking advice? You won't be able to shut them up....Just remember you might be a bit of a boring character being that shy and you probably are...........Hey, what you're doing now is not working. Start practicing what I'm telling you........You're in such a hole that it probably won't work right away but keep at it (non-boringly) and you'll see I'm right.

Answer 4

Okay...I saw this on Drake & Josh one time and I think it'd work. Go up to said girl, give her a good compliment, and just walk away...as simple as that. I know that if a guy gave me a compliment and just walked away, I'd notice him. And when she follows you and stops you to talk to you, don't freeze up. You got her attention now and it's your time to shine. Don't worry about not coming up with anything to say...just wing it and it'll be fine. And when you get nervous, just take a few deep calming breaths before you take the plunge and compliment a girl. Be confident in yourself and you can probably get any girl you want...I wish you luck and hope you have a good year in college!

Answer 5

dont think that they'll eat u up or somethin like that.... try to maintain ur cool, dont lose it... and dont over react.. girls dont like it when u over react.....