I'm staying with a very privileged family in a few days' time. As nice as they are, mealtimes are always very formal (full silverware, waiter, fruit to be peeled and eaten with knife and fork only, no hands allowed!) I'm by no means deprived of social graces but always feel rather awkward. Far too much potential for sending peas flying across the table! Any suggestions???
2007-09-03 08:45:49 · 8 answers · asked by katatins 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Just be gentle, refined, and dont draw attention to yourself.
First ...thank them for inviting you to dinner, if you have been there before say...you always have such elegant enjoyable dinners or something to that effect.....
present them with a quality bottle of wine....
Elbows always OFF the table, ...
napkin in your lap,...
no unappetizing conversations, dont compliment the food too much, just say 'thank you, that was delicious' at the end of the meal...
dont dominate the conversations, allow the host to lead the conversations, keep your responses short and sweet...
Use the correct utensils for the correct courses....
DRESS appropriately...
pull out chairs for women...
stand when the head of the house enters the room....
dont drink your wine too quickly...
go to the bathroom before you start eating so you are less likely to have to get up and excuse yourself during a meal....
appear relaxed and comforatable during the meal as if you eat like this all the time ( pretend your in a restaurant)...
ask for things to be passed, NEVER reach across the table for anything, and especially NEVER reach across anyones plate...
do not ask for a second helping, accept only if it is offered, and even then only take a small amount, dont act as if your a glutton or are starving to death....
when finished with the meal, sit quietly and wait for others to finish....
when getting up from the table, ( as a group), fold your napkin and place it neatly on the table NOT in the chair (where it can be forgotten)...
*** There are many books on this subject that it wouldnt hurt to browse through to make sure you dont make a mistake.
2007-09-03 09:40:12 · answer #1 · answered by pink 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Remember desert is ate with a fork not a spoon. If a ladies enters a room. Men should stand up. Two golden rules never talk about money or sex. Both are vulgar subjects. I was taught this a Swiss finishing school in Paris. But most important be yourself. Remember to have evening wear for dinner. Don't want to be seen wearing the same outfit twice at the dinner table.
2007-09-03 10:36:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's incorrect for anyone to notice an innocent, trivial mistake, so you needn't worry about them jumping up and declaring you gauche in a loud voice.
Follow their lead, as far as how to eat what, using what implements.
Don't rush.
Um, if they expect you to cut peas with a knife, they're the crazy ones. You eat peas with a fork, just scoot under them, so they roll onto your fork.
Try to relax, with in reason.
Read up on your MIss Manners for details.
The fork rule, as someone else stated (which also applies to knives) is, use the utensils furtherst out, and work your way in.
Let them start, and follow their lead.
Try not to fret.
2007-09-03 16:09:31 · answer #3 · answered by tehabwa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first, as far as the silverware is concerned, just start from the outside, with each course, and work your way in.
don't talk with your mouth full, and keep your lips closed while you chew
don't start eating what is on your plate until the person seated at the head of the table begins
2007-09-03 08:54:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Do the best you can by following what others are doing. If you aren't sure about something, lean to the person on your left or right and ask. No one will judge you for not growing up in the same environment if you are trying to fit in. They obviously must know something about you if they invite you again and again.
2007-09-03 11:29:06 · answer #5 · answered by dawnb 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just be yourself. Don't burp or fart at the table but don't worry about being prissy. I don't know why anybody makes mealtime into such a formal occasion. It makes it hard to digest your food when you're anxious about how to eat it properly.
2007-09-03 08:54:03 · answer #6 · answered by Arggg 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You worry.. and worrying stresses you out.. once youre stressed out an accident is more likely to happen.
From a true southern woman who was "raised right".....
When visiting or dining in another's home, it is THEIR job to make YOU feel comfortable and at home and completely stress free. You are the guest. They are your hosts. You should NEVER feel nervous or uptight when going to someone's home. If they make you feel that way, they need lessons in hospitality. If you are making yourself feel that way, then you do your hosts an injustice... you should let them make you feel completely at ease as their guest.
.
2007-09-03 09:17:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
"When in Rome, do as the Romans do."
That old adage applies here: when in the presence of
an elite family, be on your best behavior. (You don't
have to overdo it: don't try to look phony.)
They invited you to spend time with them because you
already made a good impression on them. So, be the
person they know you to be!
Good luck to ye'!
2007-09-03 09:05:15 · answer #8 · answered by Pete K 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋