My boyfriend and I are both christian, we have sex though. I know it's a sin before marriage?

Question

I am contemplating being celebate. How do you think my boyfriend will react to me bringing this up? How should I bring this up?

My boyfriend is a good person so I know he wouldn't get angry with me.

Answer 1

It depends if this relationship is deep and meaningfull, special and will lead to a future together.

Or are you just having sex for sex sake.

Answer 2

If your both Christians then it's not difficult of a decision to make. It's just hard to keep. You didn't say how old you are which has alot of bearing on the situation. If your old enough is the sex so good that it's the one thing that will keep you together forever. (The answer is no by the way. Sex fades). But if you've really say this is my life mate. (Because of all the reasons that should) then get married and live a glorious life. If there is very few reasons that you are together and sex is great ....you need to reevaluate the places you spend together and work on those things in which marriage material is vital for both of you. Like security , jobs, how many children you want, what you like. These things. What you don't want is to find out what was essential for a marriage and you let sex be the controlling factor and later on you find out you both weren't compatible. Then you'll know your sex was meant for someone else. But by then it'll be to late.
Hope this helps.
blessings
gary

Answer 3

I know of a couple where this happened. This guy I used to work with dated a preacher's daughter. They had been dating for a long time and were having sex. All of a sudden this girl decides to save herself for marriage. He left her. They were over. He talked about this to me and other coworkers and explained how she suddenly was like "no sex" and he couldn't handle it.
Is your sex life that bad or boring?
You sound like a mental case. Why don't you and your boyfriend get married soon, so you can enjoy your life?
My husband thinks this **** is bull **** and it's not human to take that natural enjoyment away.
You have to take care of each other's needs and you're being very mean to your boyfriend. He's going to be jerking off a lot now. He can't go from having sex with you to nothing.
He'll be addicted to internet porn really soon if that's what you want.

Answer 4

He will probably be surprised and concerned; he may well be frustrated if you bring it up in bed when he's feeling romantic.

Ask yourself these questions before you spring it on him, for both your sakes:

1. Are you wanting to stop having sex with him, or do you want him to marry you? That is the other alternative, no matter how inconvenient.

2. If you're wanting no more sex, is it him in particular, or a global no thanks? Might as well be honest with yourself and God on this one, no matter what you tell him.

3. Why is this now a question, when it wasn't before?

Nice guys do get angry, though they may not get violent or loud. Hurt feelings and frustrated sex drive do hurt.

Answer 5

Ah... the eternal struggle...
Society's programming versus Nature's programming.


ONLY bring it up if you think you can go through with it.
If you figure you can manage it fine... then just tell him straight up that you're not comfortable with sinning voluntarily on a regular basis.
If he is as christian as you say he is then he shouldn't have a counter-argument. He'll probably just grunt it off and conveniently forget about it on a regular basis.... which means you'll need to remind him.

Otherwise.... you could always get angry at him and accuse him of blasphemy or somesuch.

Answer 6

It's hard for men. Once they are used to having regular sex - taking it away is hard. Did you become a Christian after you started having sex? Hmmmm.

I know of a woman who did this. It was pretty much a ploy to get her boyfriend to propose. Didn't work though. He had sex with an airline attendant that he met on a flight to Chicago.

Bring it up like this... After you go to church one Sunday - on the way home say - "You know - we are Christians. Our faith says that we should not be having sex. I have decided to be true to my faith. Will you consider becoming celibate with me?" It will be a good time because you have just left church. Also - men don't usually like to be face to face when having discussions. The car is a great place to talk. AND - it will then be his choice. Let him know you have made your decision - and that you are asking him to go along with it.

Namaste!

Answer 7

Perhaps you should talk about your delusions to a psychiatrist dear. Zyprexa (use only as directed) is a wonderful treatment for schizoid delusional mental disorder. You will then be able to have and enjoy sex naturally as often as you like.

Enjoy !

Answer 8

It really doesn't matter what your boyfriend thinks. You two crossed a line you shouldn't have crossed when you started having sex to begin with. It may be too late to turn back now. If you do choose to abstain I hope your boyfriend agrees. If he doesn't agree than just dump him.

Answer 9

Where in the Bible does it say it is a sin? Often times we take what is written out of context by using only one or two passages that suits the message we wish to deliver. A skillful lecturer can take War and Peace and, by using passages out of context, tell you the day of Christ's return.

Answer 10

define sin

religion is a choice, as is sexual relation with others

if you hijack the poonanny, what do you think he will do?

how would you feel if he did the same?

sex can be a weapon to manipulate behavior, but in mutual relations that is off limits

it's easier for religious people to do this, since they are being manipulated, others in same circles respond to this

Answer 11

It's not a sin... you two just decided to get married without paperwork... no big deal. It you feel strongly about it, go find a J.P. and make it legal according to the government...