i was baptised as a baby (when i had no choise) and now at 17 my mum wants me to get confirmed, i dont know weather to or not, i dont believe in god, but i dont want to upset her, should i do it just for her but make it clear i dont believe (what harm can it do), or should i just refuse to do it?
any advise is welcome
2007-09-03 02:01:25 · 11 answers · asked by Kruger, Freddy Kruger 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Tough one. She should probably know that you aren't a believer, and being one herself (presumably), this isn't going to be easy for her to accept (atheist parents are WAY cooler if their kids want to get religion).
But you should tell her kindly but plainly that to be confirmed is exactly that - a confirmation of the baptism you received before you could consciously make the choice yourself. Tell her that you CANNOT confirm that commitment because you cannot believe firmly enough in what is being confirmed. Tell her you fear being a hypocrite both to yourself, to her, and in the eyes of her god. Perhaps, you may hint, the time will come when you can take confirmation with a sincere heart, but it is not a kind of symbolic gesture - it is the real deal (or should be, if it was ever meant to be worth anything). You'll let her know if or when that time comes. In the meantime, she should not put pressure on you to commit to any ideas you do not actually hold.
Good luck - this might be a bit of a ride.
2007-09-03 02:09:19 · answer #1 · answered by Bad Liberal 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At infancy we are too young of course to be making a choice. Accepting the Lord and being baptised is something we have to be aware of our choice. Babies that are (baptised) are the result of parents actually presenting the child to the Lord in His name, and it shows they will bring the child up in a christian environment. We are each given a mind, or heart if you will, to make choices. You cannot force someone to 'come to the Lord.' I pray that you think this over carefully, and realize that God is very real, and that he loves you. There is not particular age that you accept the Lord, it has to be right in your heart, and I hope that one day soon you will realize that life without God, is not a fulfilled life. How can anyone look at the beauty in this world, and not believe in God. It didn't just happen. The bad things in this world man himself has created. When God created all, the bible itself, states, of all His creations, "and it was good." Everyone has a purpose. So do you, and God would like to use you to help him. Serving the Lord will give you peace in your life when life throws you a curve ball. Talk to your mother, and explain your feelings. If you get, 'confirmed', and you are NOT sincere, you are not being honest with the Lord. I wouldn't want to be in that position. Perhaps one day, the Lord will speak to your heart, or there will come a day, when there is no one that you feel you can count on, and He will be there, as He is even now, and forever for you. I hope you find peace in the Lord.
2007-09-03 09:31:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was confirmed at age 12 and I most assuredly was not a "believer." My family was well aware of my beliefs, but I wasn't given much of a choice. Not that I fought it very hard, because basically I really didn't care to rock the boat about something that didn't hurt me, would make my mom happy, and I didn't believe in it anyway-so what's the big deal? At age 17 I think it would have been a drawn out battle as I was much more opinionated at that age.
I do think your mom should know your beliefs, but it is up to you whether you would like to placate her by doing it, or refusing and standing your ground. I believe both ways can be right-it's simply what you feel is right for you.
2007-09-03 09:22:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Given your current thinking, receiving confirmation would be dishonest because you don't believe in God. However, learning about Christianity by taking the Confirmation class would be helpful to you in two ways. First, it would honor your mother, whose faith was instrumental in all the love and care she has lavished upon you for 17 years. Second, if the class is presented well, it will reveal the evidence for Christianity and allow you a better chance to make decisions that will affect your present and future happiness.
If you take the class, I hope you will continue to ask questions and get good answers.
2007-09-03 09:15:07 · answer #4 · answered by Bruce 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that you need some time to think about it.
Here is something for you to think about. Is it God that you have trouble believing in, or is it the nonsense that religion has told you about God that you find unbelievable.
Me too.
Love and blessings Don
2007-09-03 09:12:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow thats a tough break personally i'd be tempted to just go along with it but i think you need to tell her that you are an atheist that you don't believe in god but if thats really what she wants then you'll do it that way everyone is happy
2007-09-03 09:06:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok, this what i would do. honestly if ur hearts not in it then DONT! i know u dont want to hurt her, but tell her ur beliefs; if she loves u (im sure she does) she wont sweat it...but then again, she might, because she doesnt want her son to burn in hell for all eternity........but yeah, i dont like the whole getting baptized as a baby!! oh no
2007-09-05 05:04:24 · answer #7 · answered by Jeannie A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get down on your hands and knees and ask the Lord to come into your heart and reveal Himself to you. There is nothing wrong with telling God that I want to believe but I can't. Please Lord, Help my unbelief. Try it.
2007-09-03 09:07:47 · answer #8 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
when you get confirmed you have to swear that you believe in god etc.... is that something you want to do
2007-09-03 09:05:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
use ur distinct to differentiate which religion is good and bad
2007-09-03 09:07:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋