How can I stop this?

Question

Im starting high school tommorow. Im overweight. I have GYM class and I think I have social anxiety. From my other 2-3 questions about it, you can go read them. I dont feel like re-explaining it again. From middle school, EVERY YEAR I had gym because I would not dress and sat out on the bleechers. I failed every year. Explaining why I have it this year again. When I would play in sports like in basketball or football, I couldnt concentrate. One time we were playing b-ball on teams and I kept messing up because I thought students were laughing at my fatass. In football in 6th grade, this kid goes "CMON FATASS WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" I really wanted to cry. I got so mad and wanted to knock him out. How can I put this into my head that "if you call me fat I dont care" Its some what in my head, BUT I cant turn into it. People in eighth grade used to call me "big boy" and "fatass" but it never hurted me that much.

I dont know if its because I was getting used to it or what. I went to counseling a few times in 7th grade. It helped some. But its not that im shy. I never talk, I have no friends. I can walk up to someone and ask them a question but I get nervous. I couldnt walk up to a groupe of kids and ask one of them a question because the anxiety takes control. I just want a goal to make in my head where I can just "SO WHAT". Some kids encouraged me to play football. I just cant do it because I have that anxiety issue. Most of them kids are so immature. And all these fking "ghetto wannabe" are just sooooo immature. There so fake I cant get over it. But then they get around friends and have to scream and yell and laugh and want to be noticed. And then sometimes make fun of other kids and laugh. It doesnt hurt me that much anymore but its still there to where it affects me in some way. I know if I ever wanted to get mad enough, I could beat them up so badly.

Ive tried to dress nice and shower. Wear cologne and just have a nice image. I really like to dress liek a rapper myself. But I feel like I get noticied alot because most of my school is like that lol. I cant get over dressing "BLACK". I love it. I love to noticied too but not around loud immature people. Im just so much mature than all the other kids.

Can someoen give me advice!


IGNORE MY BABBLING lol

Answer 1

I'm in almost the excact situation as you... I'm also starting high school tommorow, I am very overweight and i'm so nervous. I have always been very shy and the weight only added to my insucruity... what works/ed for me is not being noticed I have a few friends that I am not very close to but I can still hang around with them. Classes are fine I just keep my head down and get through it and at lunch I usally spend my time in the library doing homework. As for gym I just show up and try and try not to embarass myself regardless gym is my least favourite class. But after this year I can drop it. The best advise I can give is to find something you realy love some sport, hobby or activity that you have deep pasion for and emerse yourself in it. I look around me at my peers and it makes me sad they are all having a fun time enjoying there schooling but I just try to get through the day without being bullied so I can go home and recouperate. If you have access I recomend a phycologist or phyciatrist but that didn't work for me because I was too embarresed to be honest with them. Anyways hang in there it will be better after high school (I hope) Good luck at school tommorow.... just take comfort in knowing that Me and alot of other kids with be just as nervous as you. Sorry for all the spelling errors I'm realy tired and nervous Cheers.

Answer 2

You have answered your problem very well my friend. The thing or word that I am wanting to read is self determination.

Keep in mind that you are the only can that can help yourself. You need to play ball games in gym class. Even by yourself alone at home you can do stationary exercises while listening to the music,planning your meals wisely, no colas, only water and very strong will. Self determination is the answer my friend.

I used to weigh more than you do but I said to myself I can do it. It took me almost 6 months but the end result is satisfying. Words of encouragement is not enough it is your will to succeed that counts.

Attend your gym class regularly. Show them what you have.
Start aiming for the better, dont mind other's opinion and suprise them with your end result. Goodluck!!!!

Answer 3

This is such a sad story really, is there anyway like away from school you could excercise like going to the gym and getting healtheir? This will then improve your confidence and stuff. In the meantime, just try REALLY hard to forget about what people are/might be saying/thinking and putting your energy into passing Gym this year. I'm so sure you could achieve all of this if you tried really damm hard. Good luck x

Answer 4

Ryan
It is hard in this day and age to be big..I know because I am big too. Some say it is harder on girls, but I say it is hard on those of us who wish to be more normal sized.
I work out everyday, on a treadmill and a recumbant bike.
It is soo hard to lose the weight for me because I also have lung disease.
You are young and strong.. And another plus is you are more mature than the others..
Find yourself one good friend... All it takes is one real true friend and you will soar!!
And Ryan when you start to feel down..Go back for a bit of therapy.. I do every once in a while to keep me on track...
http://www.myspace.com/ms_dame_wolf
anytime you wish to talk go there..
Luka

Answer 5

Join a wrestling club and let the taunting drive you on to victory.
That or you could play bean ball, with you as the obvious target.
Sports are only games, get out and enjoy them. Win or lose, they're still fun.

Answer 6

MY BEST ADVISE: Until you like yourself what ever you act or look like, no one else will like you.

People sence your inibitions and discomforts. Humans are good at seeing the 'bad' points in people instead of looking deeper for the good ones. Even Scripture is full of people who mocked and ridiculed others and we even have God's rules on how to treat others because of that. Still, they even did it to God's own Son, Jesus, and the biggest teasers were the Scribes and Pharasees who were suppose to be the Holiest people on the earth at that time.

IF YOU DO NOT LIKE YOURSELF, then it is time for YOU to fix yourself up so that YOU WILL like yourself. Your problem is LOW SELF ESTEEM. You say it doesn't really bother you and if they call you 'fat' you really don't care. NOT TRUE! You care very much or you wouldn't be asking for help. You only say that because you have a wounded spirit and are trying to ease your pain by brushing it off. There are millions of people out there who are very overweight. Being overweight has some very bad 'health risks' to it, but a lot of those people who are overweight, have very good attitudes and lots of friends. WHY? Because they like themselves. They are not 'caught up' in their 'figures' but are 'living their lives' to the fullest' in other ways. Some of them are even very famous people like actors and actresses, or musicians. The difference between you and them is 'ATTITUDE' and 'SELF RESPECT'. You need to come to grips with WHO you are and WHY you are on this earth. All of us have to take the steps to go beyond our inhibitions and become a success. If we don't, we are just 'couch potatoes' or 'lumps of clay' with no purpose. GOD LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE. YOU NEED TO LOVE YOURSELF JUST THE WAY HE MADE YOU. That doesn't mean we cannot better ourselves. Sometimes God allows us to go through things to show us something about ourselves. Maybe He is allowing you this opportunity to 'size up your weight problem' and 'do something about losing some of it.' He wants you to live a long and productive life. Scripture says we are to 'grow old and die gracefully' but overweight problems shorten our lives. Consider that and make some good changes in your 'eating habits' to lose some. Get brave and get active in Gym. The exercise will help you lose. When people laugh at you, laugh with them. They can't laugh at someone who is already laughing. Instead of letting it wound your spirit when someone teases about how you look or your weight problem, respond back with a happy go lucky attitude and a good statement like, "I know, I'm working on losing some of it but until I do, there is just more of me to love." If you really don't act like you are hurt by them, they will soon become your friends since they no longer can aggitate you. And try to lose some weight for your health's sake.