This friend of mine whom i have told few days back that i m falling for her insists on keeping friendship. She says that she knew that i have something of that sort in my mind but she does not wanna lose a good friend thats why she never tried to avoid me. When ever i called her she responded very well. Though some times offended when i got little serious. Calls me whenever i need her for any help. and is a gem of a friend. But its being very tough for me to take her as just a friend. She had told me once that she does not want to have boy friend even though i had not proposed her that time. But i often end up venting up my feelings to her in some form or other as i m seeing her my future partner. My problem is that i never get a clear answer from myself what to do?
I never have any answer what exactly might be goin in her mind. How exactly to behave???
I m puzzled friends
2007-09-02 21:35:30 · 6 answers · asked by Aryan K 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Okay, again, I've had this happen to me. It was exactly like your story above. I liked the guy and he just wanted to remain friends. He rejected me but I STILL liked him. The plain truth was that he just DIDN'T feel anything for me and neither does your friend. If there is NOTHING there that can make her want to go further with you, there is nothing you can do! I'm sorry, but without that attraction, you and her would enter in a relationship that would be very unfulfilling. So there are a few things you can do
-forget about her entirely--cut off all contact to ease the pain and later on you could try to redeem the friendship after a long time has passed
-get over it and remain friends--this will be very hard for you but it might work
-get a different girlfriend--it will at least keep you occupied and help you get over the other girl, and it will also help you get a little more experince (i know this might seem unfair to the new 'girlfriend' but in the end, she'll get over it)
-stop spending so much time with your friend--this is something you just have to do in general, i mean, you're starting to become very dependent on this girl and its sending all the wrong messages to her (that you are dependent, immature, and unmanly), so DO try to distance yourself a little bit.
-start occupying yourself by doing things that make you feel good and keep you in shape. there's nothing like going biking with all your buddies, having a good time, and knowing that you're a little bit healthier!
I'm sorry, but i genuinely think that because she's refused you for such a long time and so many times that its unlikely she'll suddenly open her eyes and go out with you. It's best you just move on and you don't necessarily have to stop the relationship, but you DO need to put some space between the two of you.
Good luck!
2007-09-03 17:15:18 · answer #1 · answered by Nina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ooh. That's a really tough decision. I do have a guy friend like you though, I loved him and waited for him and I thought he doesn't feel the same way that I did, so i opted to forget the feelings and be his best friend instead. But time came and he told me he loved me too! Aw man, when I heard those words, I felt my heart breaking. Because I don't feel the same way again...
Right now, we're still best of friends, he moved on and is happy with his new girlfriend. But the decision still lies in your hands: is she worth the wait? Or being friends, is it the answer?
You know, we never get the chance to know if we'd really be happy with each other or just kill each other because WE REALLY DIDN'T GIVE IT A CHANCE! I don't know if this will work out for you but why don't you give it a shot? Tell her how you feel. Maybe she's just as confused as you are. Females like us sometimes denies that we love this person but deep down inside, we really do. We females are afraid of rejection too. Give it a shot, if it works well, then Hooray for you. If it doesn't, at least you wouldn't have regrets like we did and you won't spend some of your nights asking yourself what ifs..
Good luck!
2007-09-03 04:47:17 · answer #2 · answered by Emz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't keep pressing her, it might push her away. If you guys are meant to be together romantically, it will happen naturally when the time is right. In the meantime, just be there for her but be there for yourself too and find a girl who digs you that way.
2007-09-03 04:40:41 · answer #3 · answered by bezsenný 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cannot force a person to fall in love with you...she told you she wants you as a friend...then remain one to her...suppress any romantic feelings for her because this just might make her angry and might drive her away...who knows, if you keep being a good friend to her, she might change her mind about you and make you her bf...in the meantime...be patient and be a great friend...
2007-09-03 04:45:16 · answer #4 · answered by geisha 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Act like a friend. That is all she wants from you. Get over the romantic part, she is not interested in that.
2007-09-03 04:41:42 · answer #5 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sound like your hormones are going crazy. Calm down and but be her friend or you will loose her.
2007-09-03 04:41:51 · answer #6 · answered by tibor32806 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋