Lately i happened to gain a bit of weight and I felt conscious abt it coz my bf have been quite negative abt it. (I didn't say anything when he gained weight)...
i understand this thing called the relationship weight, where you are so happy in the relationship that you eat a lot. I am aware that i gained weight but the way he's saying it, makes me wonder a lot abt our relationship.
And i've already mentioned to him that his remarks hurt me. Is that how you define love? I am getting my body back, not for him, but for myself.
Isn't love abt accepting the other for who they are? I am petite, i love my curvy body and i'm only 50-ish kg.
2007-09-02 21:21:18 · 12 answers · asked by NOTurBFF!! 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
How much does your boyfriend weigh? Because that would be the best weight to lose - him!
2007-09-02 21:28:03 · answer #1 · answered by T 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
well you are so right, love is about excepting each other for who you are. how long have you been going out with him? if it has been for a fairly long time then maybe you do have reason to worry, because he has supposed to have learnt that by now: but not so much cuz instead of just tellin him how u feel jus talk abt it, and mention to him that when he gained weight u never criticised him about it. just make sure that he did not go out with you for all the wrong reasons, i.e your weight. 50 is small, what does he want you to be? look if you are comfortable with your weight then i see no reason to change it, i know u say its for yourself but think about it, if your boyfriend hadn been actin a little off ish about your weight you would not have made up the desicion to change back... in some way i think you are doing it for him and thats not right. he has to learn it, live it, love it...! you are not 100kgs, i think you are perfect..!
2007-09-03 04:35:41 · answer #2 · answered by badgirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're completely right. Love is about accepting the other for who they are. I don't know what's going on in his mind, but he needs to reevaluate what he's saying and doing. You don't need to take **** from him. You have the power to do whatever you want. Just talk it through and if he's completely selfish and doesn't understand how you feel, reevaluate the relationship. Relationships are give and take. If they give **** they should expect to get that back in return.
2007-09-03 04:32:03 · answer #3 · answered by Dave 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may really hurt but if it'll keep you fit then that's one good thing you should appreciate and probably love should not even be in question here. All he wants is to keep you in shape not really for him but for your own satisfaction. But if there'd be other aspects in your life that he needs to keep the same even if change is inevitable then you can think twice about his feelings for you. He may not love you after 30 or 40 years the way he loves you now.
2007-09-03 04:31:02 · answer #4 · answered by sakura0925 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's like that to you now, imagine how he will be when you have a couple kids and put on some real weight. Move on girl.
Why do you take his crap?
Thats the question you should asking.
2007-09-03 04:28:10 · answer #5 · answered by Rudy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if your bf really loves you, he shouldn't mind too much about the weight gain...people in deep relationships see past through the physical attributes of their partners...it's obvious that your partner see you as more of a trophy gf and so is bothered by your weight gain...talk to him about it again...how his words hurt you...if he doesnt stop being nasty to you...just find someone else who will love you the way you are...and good for you...wanting to get your body back and being beautiful for yourself and not for anybody else is good...
2007-09-03 04:30:24 · answer #6 · answered by geisha 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's being a jerk about it you don't have to put up with that. So you gained a little bit of weight, big deal. If he doesn't like it you can kick his butt to the curb.
2007-09-03 04:29:20 · answer #7 · answered by Lizzie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
May be he is concerned, the similar way u dont like it urself.
U know him better than those who reply to u. rethink about him is he worth anything? Tell him u like urself this way, a bit plump, and his reaction will help u decide.
2007-09-03 05:01:02 · answer #8 · answered by bird 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is concerned for your health its one thing, if he is abusive because he doesnt like the way you look that is another. its pretty simple really, if he is abusive dump him. you dont need that crap. there is no reason to be in this relationship if he is hurting you. move on. love yourself and dont let anyone treat you like crap. you will find a decent loving guy someday. maybe it wont be tomorrow, but dont settle for less.
2007-09-03 04:30:57 · answer #9 · answered by gadfly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is the old double standard. They can get as big as they want, but you are their trophy, so you have to stay slender. What a crock of bull!!!
2007-09-03 04:33:53 · answer #10 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋