my mom doesnt want me to join the USMC?

Question

my mom is a very depressed woman. For the passed year or so ive been the thinking about joining the Marines. Recently, ive been pretty set-in-stone about it. I believe its my niche. When I told my mom about this she seemed.very sad and told me not to make her any more sad then she is. If there are any marines or former marines out there with experience, how did you go about it? I just turned 17 and am a junior in high school so I still have some time. I want to join so that I can make something of myself, so that I can accomplish something very few can do. I can look back on my life and say that I did something with pride. Also, my family has a distinguished military history. both of my grandfathers faught in wwII, one was awarded a distinguished flying cross(right below the medal of honor). I also have two cousins, one who is now in the reserve and another who went to Iraq and is now a recruiter, I want to keep the tradition going

Answer 1

It is very noble to want to join the military for family tradition. To be able to serve your country is the greatest thing you can do as a young adult. If she doesnt want you to be a Marine, try the Army.

Answer 2

You know that is a hard one. Mothers generally cry when their son goes off to the military. I have been in over 15 years and my mom still worries for me. However, you mom has already been suffering from depression. The thought of you joining the Marines might make her worse. Sometimes you need to think of your family first. You have several more years before you are to old to join. Why not wait a couple more years, your mom might be able to except you going if you are little older. You don't want your moms health being a burden on your shoulders, especially 2 years from now when you could be deployed to a hostile area. So make sure you mom is taken care of first then you can carry on the family tradition

Answer 3

My husband had the same problem! His mom actually tried killing herself while he was in boot camp (she didn't succeed). And even though his mom was in the hospital my husband didn't go home. When he asked her why she did it. She said she wanted him to come home. I don't think your mom will take it to this extreme though...plus there were other things going on with his sister at the time. He just kept telling himself that it could always be worse than it is. She was an unhappy person long before he even mentioned joining...he didn't want to let her emotions and fears get in the way of his future. He has always taken care of his mom and he did get her help before she left. She attends therapy regularly and is on medication. Personally, even though I would never say this to her, I thought it was awfully selfish of her to do that to her son. A mother is supposed to enable a son/daughter to accomplish their dreams. Not hinder it. Somehow he made it through...I have no idea how.

Tell her that you want to be somebody, you want her to be proud...my husband joined at 19 and he has never regretted the decision. He actually wishes that he would have joined sooner and not listened to people. Lots of people told him that he was going to die...that he wouldn't make it through boot camp...that he was being selfish by going into the USMC. Do not listen to any of this. People are just scared for you. Or they are jealous and too chicken sh*t to join themselves.

Once your mom realizes the training you are going to have and the skills you will gain...she wont be so depressed. She will be happy and confident in your ability to serve your country. The Marines are the best of the best. You will have good people watching your back. My husbands mom is over the whole thing now and she is really proud of my husband. Best of luck! God bless!

Answer 4

First L ..... a mom or dad does things for their children un-selfishly. Don't lay a guilt trip at this young mans feet because of his mom. I suggest that the young man get help for his mom. Sounds to me like she may have a chemical imbalance. When I was young I knew I wanted to be a Marine since the first day I walked into Marine Barracks Norfolk, Va.
My dad was career Navy and tried to talk me out of joining the Corps. Vietnam was goin'on and the news was full of Marines and body counts. I went anyway and me and my dad grew closer than we ever had been before. I aint sayin' this will happen for you but what I am saying is ...... it is your life and you only get 1 shot at it. Do what YOU thing is right for YOU.
"To thine own self be true" I believe you will make a fine
Devil Dog. Good Luck on both fronts young man!!

Answer 5

at the age of 18 and a High School graduate, you are considered an adult and able to make your own decisions.

You CANNOT live your life any other way than the way that fits YOU best. this may mean going against a parent's wishes or desires. THIS DOES NOT MAKE YOU A BAD SON/DAUGHTER.

You MUST live your OWN life and not be pressured into doing(or not doing) something out of parental guilt. Your Mother has no right to make you give up your dreams.

She is of course allowed to be worried for you, and to have apprehensions. She is NOT allowed to dictate how you live your life(once you are of age)

Answer 6

Hey, Understand where your mom is coming from, I mean think about it, would you necessarily want your child going off to War? Of course if you did go, I'm sure she will be proud of you. Once you put yourself in her shoes you may be able to talk to her a little easier, not only that but you have a whole year ease her into the idea of you joining the military. I'm in the Navy so i won't say Semper Fi...but good luck lol

Answer 7

If you are intelligent, then doing something that you know will make your mom worried sick for your life should not be the only way you can make your life worthwhile.

If your love for your mom is not just expressed on your lips, you would not make her sadder than she already is. Listen to your mom. Don't be so selfish. If you can remember all the personal sacrifices she has made for you while you were growing up so that you can be here today, then you would not even think of torturing her mentally just because YOU want to do something.

Nowadays, saying "I love you" has become a cheap lip service, because those who say it would often turn around and hurt the most important person in their lives with selfish actions. If your mother has been a good mother to you, then I guarantee that NOTHING and NO ONE ELSE in this world will ever offer anything that even comes close to the genuine unconditional love she has for you. Repay her with action, not words. You would find out the hard way that no amount of personal achievement, no amount of prayers, and no amount of regrets can bring her back to you if you lose her.

Everybody has an opinion on this, but whose feelings should matter the most to you? Your mom's or the responders on this forum? If you even have to THINK about choosing between your mom and these strangers, then your mom either did not raise you in a loving way or you are just like the majority of your generation --- the "ME" generation.


PRC47 Grunt:

Pity that creatures like you are all that your parents' generation could raise. Maybe that is what overdoses of love will do to a person's growth. You typify the ME generation, like almost all the other disgusting responders here. You state matter-of-factly that a parent cares "unselfishly" for a child, yet there is no hint of human compassion or decency in your response. The fact that your mom is unselfish towards you is taken for granted, and you do not expect yourself to reciprocate the same kindness. No, others are just SUPPOSED to selflessly serve you and see things your way. Since your mom SHOULD sacrifice herself for you, there is no obligation for you to consider her. No, all you need to do is satisfy your own desires first. It's your mom's own problem to deal with if anything happens to her. "She'll get over it!" If not, too bad! Tell her that "you love her" and just deal with it! The world can only revolve around your needs.

Pitiful that this is what American culture has created.

Answer 8

It is not her choice. You have to live you your own life and make your own choices. You cannot let your mothers depression dictate how you live your life.
I however didn't have that problem with my family but i know some other Marines who did. Their family eventually got over it, some did not. What made them choose was knowing they didn't want to live a life of regret, you know..

Whoulda , shoulda , coulda

Let your mom know that you understand her worry but that you have to live your own life and you feel that this is the right choice for you.


Good Luck, you mom will have to get over it and I hope you make the right choice

Answer 9

u still have a year to figure this out

i believe that the USMC fiscal year 2007 ended next June, so next July there will be slots for military jobs you want.

i have no personal advise for u.

good luck, hope u will be a marine one day

semper fidelis

Answer 10

My son joined the Corps, & I was very proud of him. Ask the recruiter to make an appointment with your Mom to visit about it. He'll be able to alleviate most of her fears, & possibly give her some insite as to what advantages there are with the Corps, as opposed to other branches of the service. Good luck to you, Semper Fi!