I was supposed to get her Friday night but I completely forgot and hooked with this girl. I went to get her yesterday morning and her mom tried to make me feel bad, it worked. I just forgot, I am not used to having to pick her up for the weekends. This is an arrangement that me and her mom just worked out.
2007-09-02 11:16:47 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Serena- thats a good point. I will bring it up when I take her back home. Its not something we need to worry about now, she's only 4 months but that will definitly be a problem in a few years.
2007-09-02 11:26:39 · update #1
ghetto_princess- Sorry to hear that. But I am more then sure that me and your dad are nothing a like and I know this one time will not affect her, hell she probably doesnt even know that I was supposed to take her yesterday. She's a baby.
2007-09-02 11:39:04 · update #2
mimi- because that was a part of what her mom was bitching about. She asked where I had been and I told her. And well she got mad.
2007-09-02 11:47:14 · update #3
Jess- Congrats. Boy or Girl?
2007-09-02 12:04:35 · update #4
You will be fine in the long run, this is your first time being a parent and sometimes people forget they even have a child if they haven't had responsibility before. My girlfriend had a baby with her husband but he worked out of town most of the time. He came home and they went to dinner, she said it sure is nice to be away from the baby and he asked what baby. He was a great dad and his little girl had him wrapped around her little finger long before she went off to the expensive college he paid for. Just because his daughter slipped his mind once doesn't mean he was bad.
Once you have responsibilities to your child you can not forget her for a moment every thing you do is for her. You will need to consider her first in all decisions from buying live insurance to seeing that she lives in a safe home with good health care. You need to protect her heart and body, doing your very best to show her love and protection. Your ex is probably an excellent parent so you weren't worried about your baby. Even if you aren't a couple you need to work with her to raise your child. When you get your baby for visitation you must consider her too. She may have had a date or other plans and really wanted you to not only bond with your baby but to give her a night off.
Make sure you never forget your daughter and become the very best ex you can be so your ex never has any reason to think your daughter isn't safe in your care.
2007-09-02 12:09:01 · answer #1 · answered by shipwreck 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is a brand-new arrangement... you can't expect to get it perfect all the time, but you better learn from your mistakes. Your daughter doesn't know now, and as long as your ex isn't crazy and determined to talk trash, your daughter will never know that you forgot and went out with some chick instead. It's not a big deal as long as you don't make a habbit out of it. OH, for the record, it isn't your ex's business that you hooked up with some chick or what you were doing other than a general answer... she's going to be bitter an give you an even bigger guilt trip if she finds out you missed picking up your daughter for a chick rather than working late or straight up forgetfulness.
Good luck. I hope you guys can work out a better arrangement or that this one will work out in the long run... I also hope your ex doesn't hang this over your head for too long trying to make you feel like crap.
2007-09-02 11:53:51 · answer #2 · answered by elliecow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a calender, put a reminder on your phone, just something to help you remember which Friday is yours.. My ex and I are always asking if this is "my" Friday and its been a couple of years.. LOL Being this is something new, its understandable. accidents happen. and as far as the mother goes, maybe she had plans. even just plans to hang out with not having to take care of the baby is a big thing. so of course she will be mad. you could have worked on a car and she would have still been mad... Good Luck!!!!
2007-09-02 23:34:23 · answer #3 · answered by CJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you feel it was necessary to tell us that you hooked up with a girl if you honestly just forgot? No matter the reason, there is nothing that you can do about it now. Apologize to her mother, and move on. At least you do feel guilty about it. From now on just make sure that you are on time and that you remember when to pick her up.
2007-09-02 11:44:07 · answer #4 · answered by mimi 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
I could not imagine forgetting my child. My child is number one, before any woman or any event that could be going on. This does not make you a bad person though we all make mistakes just do not make it a habit. Enjoy your child while you can. They are a blessing
2007-09-02 11:49:09 · answer #5 · answered by ron j 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know how it is to try to start a new routine. Your ex is an ex for obvious reasons. You need to suggest that if she wants to talk to you about anything that it needs to be you two only without your child around. When she made you feel bad, your kid was there, right? She needs to learn how to behave around your daughter in a way that won't undermine your authority and in a way that doesn't make you look stupid. She may have done it unconsciously, but she basically emmasculated you right in front of your daughter. She's learning how to act toward men and it's not the kind of lesson she needs to be taught.
2007-09-02 11:23:52 · answer #6 · answered by Serena 7 · 3⤊ 4⤋
Yea my dad did that to me when I was little and now I can barley trust guys. I try to not blame it on that, but I can't help thinking that they are all up to something. My dad used to say he was coming and not show up until the next day. It really hurt me and it still bothers me to this day. I think that is bad parenting, you don't forget your kids. Maybe you should try harder to remember or even write a note if that's what it takes to remember your daughter.
Don't make a habbit of it because that DID effect me. Yea she wont remember this time, but if she was older it could really hurt her. Oh and your nothing like my dad who forgot to pick me up because he was banging bar H***. =) Yup nothing like him.
2007-09-02 11:35:36 · answer #7 · answered by Shelbi =) 5 · 3⤊ 3⤋
Your actions were irresponsible. Your CHILD comes FIRST and some bimbo comes well below that!!! You're a PARENT which means you don't have the right to act irresponsibly! It doesn't matter that you aren't used to picking her up for the weekend. What matters is that she IS YOUR CHILD and you were supposed to pick her up. It doesn't matter if this was a new arrangement.
Your child is supposed to come before your d***!!!
Her mom had every right to be irritated and try to make you feel bad as what you did was VERY wrong. Your child could be kidnapped or killed if you forget your responsibility to pick her up at newly appointed times.
2007-09-02 11:23:36 · answer #8 · answered by Nedra E 7 · 5⤊ 5⤋
it will be fine just don't make it a habit. sometimes it's hard for your ex to understand things. she was with you once so it makes her think she has a right to judge you but she doesn't don't worry about it.
2007-09-02 11:58:32 · answer #9 · answered by Supermommy!!! 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No,Its all new to you, but make her your number 1 priority from here on.
2007-09-02 12:15:27 · answer #10 · answered by Granny 1 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋