Mental health question...?

Question

I'm pretty sure I have bipolar. At the moment it's not possible for me to visit a doctor (my mother believes that this is just a phase, that has been going on for the last 4 years...).

I'm doing my best to cope with everything and I have come a long way with the help of my best friend/boyfriend.

Please don't say go and get help behind your Mum's back, because I have tried and it made everything so much worse.

But basically this is my question. My moods go up and then I have a major down. There is always a severe low that follows an extreme high.

I'm really worried because I've had a major high for the last week and I've been sooooo happy. I'm scared that I am going to have a really really big low soon.

How can I handle this? I'm really scared.

If you mean drinking alcohol then you're screwed in the head.

Phil- When I was 14 I was diagnosed with major depression, that's when my Mum freaked out and said I would just get over it.

Answer 1

Bipolar disorder is a very serious one, and one that can only be properly diagnosed by a professional. However, since you know that your mother won't allow you to seek out medical help (I have a similar problem. I feel I am often depressed (but with the same highs and lows that you mentioned), and it makes me uncharacteristically unmotivated. My sister (who is the major factor in whether I do something or not) blames it on laziness, even though I know that's not the case. Not after three years, for me, of ups and downs.), I suggest continuing to seek the support of your (boy)friend. At the same time, carefully gauge how much he can take so as to not inadvertently push him away and give yourself needless guilt (though the fact that he has stood with you all this time shows that he is strong and can take a lot for you), and don't be afraid to just take time to yourself to cry, or to scream, if you need to.

Think of things that you do right before a high. Is there something that triggered it? Some happy event? The thought of some memory? Use that to your advantage, if you can. I always find, too, that distracting myself helps, even if it's not a permanent fix. Find a hobby to keep yourself out of your head. Something that makes you laugh, even if, when the lows come, only makes you smile a little. A small smile is better than nothing.

If you can, try to meditate. Like the distractions, it can help to clear your head for a bit and make things more bearable.

Write a journal or a diary, even if you expect nobody else to ever read it. Treat it like a shoulder to lean on; a place to vent your thoughts.

Take naps. They make the time go faster.

Give hugs. Other people's smiles can sometimes bring on your own.

None of these things may work (and if that's the case, I apologize), or they may have given you ideas for other things to do.

Above all, remember that, as the good days are followed by bad, so are the bad followed by the good.

I hope I helped, even if just a little.

The only other thing I can do, even though I'm a complete stranger, if offer myself up as someone to whom you can talk to. E-mail me, if you wish, if you have any questions or you just want to vent.

I give you my best wishes, a hug from afar, and good luck. I hope that your mom comes through for you, eventually, and that you can get the help you need. Maybe, this time, something good will come of it, if you have that down at all (and hopefully you don't, though I know from experience that's a slim chance), and it will finally be enough to open her eyes.

Answer 2

Hi fellow Kiwi ;-)

I know from earlier questions that you are 17. This is an age where you will have major ups and downs. There is a reason why they say adolescence is one of the most difficult periods in most people's lives. Hang in there, I'm sorry you're not feeling your best. I'm happy to hear your boyfriend is supportive. If you really are concerned about your mental health, try to talk to your mum and explain to her you are worried. I understand you've already tried this, but maybe sit her down and talk about it one-on-one when you both are in a calm mood and nothing else stressful is happening.

Good luck and I hope you'll feel better soon.

Answer 3

I think that if you have a regular doctor that you go to, you need to mention this to him. If not, perhap to your pastor or a teacher--someone you trust. Take your boyfriend with you if you find it hard to talk about. This is a serios condition and if it has gone on for 4 years it is not "just a phase".Medication can help you with this and so would a support group or individual counseling. You can look online to find a support group near you ar ask at a local hospital even. At the least, look for a support group online...
Please do this for your self, no matter what your mother says about it. It can make all the diffrence in your life.

AND DO NOT follow that other fellows advice to drink when you are down, this is only going to make it worse.

Answer 4

i used to be like that, eventually it went away and i could reach a neutral level again lol , when u have a major down, mayb ure stressed, there so much depressing stuff happening around u mayb s1 upset u , so all that piles up , all u have to do is tune it out , by finding time for urself to really reflect on whats making u have extreme highs and lows , jst do what makes YOU happy and jst hold on to the little things that get u thru the day , btw everyone has extreme highs and lows at some point, so dont be scared

hope this helped

Answer 5

Hi Wabby, My oldest daughter is Bipolar. She would have her good days like you and bad days too. She would hear voices and draw pictures of things she saw in her mind. It really scare me and I took her to Mental Health and that's when we
found out she was Bipolar. They gave her some medicine that seems to help her a lot. It might be a good ideal for you
to go to Mental Health and talk to someone there. I don't think
they will call your mom. Until you find out if you have Bipolar you will not get better and you could get worse. I think it's great that you have a close friend and a Loving boy friend to help you threw the spells you have. I think if you didn't have them you would really be in a lot of trouble. Please think about going to Mental Health. You will feel a ot better about your self and be able deal with your disability better.
A Friend.
poppy1

Answer 6

Wabby, if you are truly bi-polar it cannot be controled by just talking to a friend and with their support.If I understand being bi-polar it is a chemical imbalance and requires medication.I had an acquaintance who suffered from this mental health issue and you could tell that he benefited from taking his meds,He thought he could go off them and the quality of his life suffered not only for him but his family.An phase should not last for 4 years and requires you to get a doctor's assessment.We can not help you ,only advise you.A diabetic or an epileptic can not cannot help themself without medical intervention and it is the same for mental illness.I'm not not trying to be unkind but perhaps your attraction to your friend is that he has been there for you.You are still experiencing mood swings in spite of his efforts to help and support you.As a friend he should be encouraging you to seek professional help.Maybe it is just mood swings and neither bi-polarity or depression.Love yourself enough to find out.Take care.

Answer 7

"On one hand they usually claim that the voice of God speaks to them. Does any sane person hear voices?" - Mailman Fred The definition of schizophrenia (a mental health condition in which one of the main symptoms is auditory hallucinations, or hearing voices) specifically discludes "hallucinations or delusions that are socially accepted within one's culture". That means that people who hear the voice of God, see ghosts, etc. are not deemed to be mentally ill if that is acceptable within their culture. Within American and other Judeo-Christian societies, it is. That doesn't mean that a schizophrenic or other patient having a psychotic episode cannot have hallucinations about Jesus, Mary, or God - in fact, many do, particularly those raised in very religious families - but if the patient hears the voice of God or sees the Virgin Mary with NO OTHER schizoid symptoms, then that alone is not enough to justify a diagnosis of mental illness.

Answer 8

First, I am no doctor. But I'd suggest that you research some herbal mood stabilizers. You can at least get them over the counter. They are natural and maybe your mom won't deny you this help. Try talking with your mom about why she won't let you see a doctor to help you through your "phase". Good luck dear.

Answer 9

You really need to talk to your mom because she sounds like she's in denial. If you need help then she has to understand that. Is their other family members you can talk to who could speak to your mom? Medication is the only thing that can help with your bipolar. Not all medication works on everyone who has bipolar. You need professional help for sure and your mom has to understand that!!! I used to have a friend who had 3 disorders and one of them was bipolar. He would have his ups and downs too. So just try to talk to your mom or have some else talk to her!! Good luck!!!

Answer 10

if you think you need help you can go through a county mhmr center . your mom might be in denial. the thing is it takes awhile for meds to work . alcohol and drugs are a no-no . they will make you feel worse . GET YOURSELF SOME HELP .