Was asking my roommate to move out the right thing to do?

Question

I had a roommate move from out-of-state so he didn't know anyone really, but we both just started law school. The 1st week, he'd always ask me where I was and what I was doing; I just assumed he was like this because he was new and it was the first week (maybe he was lonely?). Soon I tell him I really wasn't expecting to make the roommate situation a friendship thing ('cause at this point, he made lists of what we should be doing together...i.e. he'll teach me to swim, we have to go to the park together to learn stuff, etc.). A couple days ago, I came home early to find him in my room (even though I close the door) watching tv..he acted like it was completely normal. Apparently, he's been doing this for awhile. If he didn't really creep me out, I'd try to work it out, but now my mom thinks maybe he's just lonely and that's alright (obviously my dad doesn't think so lol). Bad thing is he returned the wrong keys and said it was an accident when I asked for them. O_O

Answer 1

Yes, you did the right thing in asking your roommate to move out. You should NOT be in ANY situation that you do not like; or that you don't feel comfortable with.

I would suggest that (in the future) you establish VERY CLEAR boundaries and guidelines for what you WANT and
for what you DON'T WANT from a roommate. This should be
done UPFRONT. And also, you might state that the first
few weeks are on a "trial basis" ONLY. That way, EACH of
you would have an opportunity to see if being roommates
is a "good fit."

Answer 2

Gay, straight, makes no difference. He was in your (bed?) room even though you left the door shut. He has no sense of privacy and his behavior is only going to get worse.

The problem with the keys is since you asked for them back and he gave you the "wrong ones" he has now had time to get duplicates made. You need to tell him you want him out and he can go find his own room. After he is out, after he has returned the "right keys" change the locks on the doors.

If you are the one who has been paying the room rent and his name is not on the lease or rental agreement, you can kick him out just by throwing his stuff outside and changing the lock. That is a last resort but it is there if you need it.

Answer 3

Change the locks and call it a day. If he really is weird, he will keep coming back/seeking you to after the locks are changed. If he is just lonely he will move on, but never forget. One day years from now, you will meet in court, and he will hold this against you. There is nothing you can do right now, but change the locks if you already asked him to move out, and he decided to keep a key.

Answer 4

You absolutely did the right thing. Your ex-roommate sounded a little too clingy and strange for me. His returning the wrong set of keys worries me - I hope that you changed the locks.

Answer 5

Yeah. I do not think you two are good matches for room mates. Get the key situation irened out and find someone that is more compatible. I would not want someone in my room without my permission, and I do not want to answer to them either. He needs to be obsessive with someone else. law school is too hectic to put up with that kind of stress.

Answer 6

You know...we are all brought up differently, so it may be the 'norm' for him to do what he has been doing and saying. Probably because that's all he and his friends know. But that's not to say that you have to put up with it. You did the right thing. You have to feel comfortable in your own space. Hope you get the keys back......

Answer 7

You did the right thing. He sounds kind of creepy; reminds me of the movie 'Single White Female'. If he didn't return the right key, I'd change the locks.

Answer 8

Absolutely you did the right thing.

Now change the locks.

Or move if you have to. He sounds beyond weird.

Answer 9

No he sounds needy and creepy. Change all you locks.

Answer 10

This, in my opinion is a No Brainer.
He is Gay.