Why will anyone below 18 should be allowed to date???

Question

Even at 18 kids are barely out of school without any proper education(they don't have college education)and for that reason uncapable to affront the consequences of a bad decision not to mention that they are naive, ignorant and unexperience of life to try to live an adult life when you are still a child. anything below 20 is a teenager... so why will any mother allow their child to date and in many cases destroy their lives at such a short aged???

I rest my case. most of you shouldn't be dating at all! If you don't even have any respect for other persons points of view or opinions....lack the most insignificant rules of education and communication; then how can anyone like that should be dating??? I just can imagine how some of you treat your parents at home!
I have a daughter who is 16. She was reading at a second grade level when she was 4½ years old. She was jump from 2nd to 4th(she took second and third grade the same year). She has always been an honor student. She is taking 3 college classes while is finishing her senior year of high school. She is extremely popular and well balance and her education is very important for her. She is been planning to go to college(and checking out universities)since she started high school. Boys adore her but she believes that she has the rest of her life and that there are more important things for her to accomplish first. I am very proud of her. I raise her well thank God.

Let me make clear that I am not generalizing. Not all kids are irresponsible. I have been very blessed to see that also my nieces and nephews are very good kids. but all that has to do with their upbringing. I do believe that parents have most of the blame from how their kids turn out to be. If you teach them good values and don't let them do whatever their want we wouldn't have so many kids with problems as we do in our society. Most parents today don't seem to care, but I don't say that it applies to all the parents out there. For the people that are critisizing my grammatical errors I have to tell you not to try to "kill the messenger becuase you don't like the message". Sometimes I forget to check the content because I am more concern with the MESSAGE not the grammar. By the way, check yours first before you try to fix others. But talking about grammar that too is also one of the biggest problems or most teenagers today. They can't hardly spell but they want to "play".

Answer 1

How else will people get life experience without experiencing life....With that said, any 14,15 or 16yr old who thinks they've fallen in love with the person of their dreams are just being silly little children.

Answer 2

There are plenty of college educated people who have no clue about dating. I know many who are well into their 30's and cant get it together. Book smarts does not equal street smarts, you cant compare education to a dating age. I do agree with you though that dating at a young age is bad because of all the emotions that goes into a relationship that young people just arent equipped to handle. That is probably why they are comitting suicide or trying to kill their ex's at such a young age because they are getting too intimate way to soon. They barely know their own bodies, or who they are as of yet but they want to have a deep relationship with someone.

Lets face it though, this is the year 2007, teenagers are going to date whether parents want to face the music or not, the thing is to make dating uncomfortable for the teenager under 18. Maybe you should go on the dates with them, or make them take a younger sibling with them every time they go out on a date. So if they want to go to the movies together, the parent should sit two rows behind them, give em space without giving em space..

Answer 3

I think you're naive,ignorant and inexperienced yourself.

Teenagers should be able to date.

They shouldn't be sheltered from making adult decisions. At a young age, they should be encouraged to start thinking a bit more maturely and making responsible decisions. They should be learning how to effectively communicate with people of the opposite sex so that when it comes time to settle down, they know how to have a healthy, strong marriage. They should see a lot of different people so that they could see which ones hold the same values that they do.

I couldn't even imagine what type of mother you will be (or are) not allowing your children to grow up and do anything because you have an obscure number in your head for when you think they should start living life. All your children will end up doing is resenting you and rebelling against you. You need to let children live and explore life.

The only way for a child to NOT BE naive, ignorant and inexperienced is by allowing them to HAVE EXPERIENCES that don't involve you.

But you're obviously way too ignorant yourself to see that.

Answer 4

Well there not really kids at 18 and certainly not YOUR kids (in the sense you do not OWN them, they are responsible adults who make their own decisions) so they should be allowed to do what they like, thats my first arguement. Also just because people start dating or getting into serious relationships doesn't mean their lives are going to be ruined, in most cases people who are in relationships live standard none ruined lives, if the case is that your 'children' are inexperienced than thats your fault as a mother rather than their fault for being inexperienced. Perhaps you should let them off their leash and let them experience life and allow them to grow up before you can decide whether dating is appropriate, the only way to show responsibility is by having responsibility anyway.

My girlfriends 18 and I'm 22 and we've been together for two years, her mum doesn't mind and I think in some ways I've helped her out and she's helped me out, I think our lives are better as a result of our relationship and if you want some proof since i met her i've got a well paid job and she's now in a fantastic medical school and we live together. Prior to meeting her I was fairly irresponsible and lazy and I think rather than a relationship changing that it's encouraged me to act my age a little.

I think you have two issues here, the first is that you dont trust you children and assume that all dating leads to teenage pregnancy which is completely false, if your children aren't retarded they won't get pregnant (once again i have to emphasize that a pregnancy isn't always a case of a bad decision or a life ruined). The second is more obvious which is that you don't want your children to grow up because you think of them as your children rather than someone elses lover or whatever, which from a parental point of view is extrmely understandable.

If/when I have children one of the things I'm going to encourage is healthy relationships, i think preventing what is completely natural at the age of puberty will just encourage 'children' to do all the things you don't want them, hell hath no fursy like teenage angst.

Answer 5

When you date at a younger age, it's not the same thing as dating when you're an adult. For teenagers, it's more about experiencing and experimenting so you can see what you like and don't like, before you get out into the real adulthood. Maybe they are naive, but it's better to be naive and make mistakes as a kid rather then when you're in your twenties. Most of the time, dating around DOESN'T destroy anyone's lives. Sure, teenagers make bad decisions, but so do adults from time to time. It's just life.. go with the flow!

Answer 6

I think that every teenager has a different mentality and you can tell by how they act. Since I was 13 I always looked about 17 because I worked and I knew alot of what was going on that most teenagers did not know. When your about 16 you should definitely right from wrong and you have to make your own choices and some times you may fall on your face but you have to admit, when you have your first REAL boyfriend at lets say maybe 15 or 16 then you get heart broken you go crazy and you cant forget about him but later on it helps you to get over other boyfriends faster and the breakups arent as bad and well if you never dated and your 20....yeah. BUT that does not mean you should allow your child to do as they want because kids are very curious so you should keep a good eye on them but you do have to trust them a bit. Now Im 19 and Im married (and no I do NOT have kids) and I dont plan to have kids any time soon but my husband who is also 19 is in the military and we have a god life and we live in Germany now. Actually, we are doing alot better than most of the adults here and handle money way better than other couples. I know we got married young but I don't regret it because were both mature enough to know whats best for our future. But like I said, you know your child and you know what he/she can do but remeber that even though my mom didn't like me dating I still did just like everytbody in H.S does and it wasn't until I got into a serious relationship that I finally told her and tried to open up with her. But I do understand why you feel like that but you have to put yourself in their shoes too and they dont want to feel like their mother has no trust in them.

Answer 7

You asked this question and yet you don't want other peoles opinions.
Yes your child is a clever student but not all kids are naturally bright.
If you are critezing other people for education when your grammar isn't to perfect yourself.
People are mature enough to do what they think is right, they are not your children and if they have children early and 'throw their lives away', that is their problem and you should just leave it at that.
Some teenagers are very mature and when they fall in love they know how to handle it. Dont let a few single teenager mothers count for all of the other mature teenagers.

Answer 8

i think u have totally said the question wrong, i believe that teenagers should be allowed to date, get experiences and get knowledge from these relationships for the future. people like you think teenagers shouldnt have a life, well why not? you only live once and you have to make mistakes and learn from them. as for being naive and ignorant... well some teenagers are more grown up than people in there 30's, it really annoys me wen people say things like this and when old people look down there noses at the younger generation! not everyone is bad under 20! and the choices that teenagers make do not destroy there lives, parents should have a say in who they date if they are alot older than there child then if not they should be left to there own devices.

Answer 9

i get what you mean..alot of 18 year olds are very immature and all they care about is drinking drugs and showing off to their mates..but then you have to also rememeber there are some 18 yr olds that are even more grown up than someone in their 30's. it all depends on the individual..so it should be up to the parents to decide whether the kids is mature enough to be getting involved in relationship..but remember most teenagers will go out of their way to hide a relationship they are in if forbidden to date..so surely its better to know what they are up to than be overly strict and have them not confide in you if something goes terribly wrong?

i'd rather let my kids date and be there to support them if it goes wrong..than have them hide things from me and then regret being so strict when they commit suicide through a failed relationship.


also..just because someone has an education doesn't mean they can cope with life...I have a friend who has gone through uni etc..she is the most naiive immature person i have ever met!

Answer 10

Hey genius...you need to remember two things...

First, being over the age of 20 and/or having a college education does not ensure you to make good decisions. I know plenty of people well over 20, educated and not, that have managed to make a career out of bad decisions...

Second, going on a date does not mean you will screw up your life. NEWSFLASH---not all teenagers have sex. Sure, lots of them do. But even at that, most of them nowadays are smart enough to use protection.

So, stop trying to turn society back 200 years. The days of arranged marriages, at least in my country, ARE OVER. People are going to date. It is part of growing up. It allows a person to socialize with a variety of personalities. It is a definite MUST as far as I am concerned. After all, who in the world would want to move out of their parents home at the age of 20, having never had a date, having never "hung out" with others? Talk about socially handicapped!!!

Lighten up. People screw up and make bad decisions at ALL AGES IN LIFE. Not just teenagers.

Answer 11

I really hope you are not a native English speaker, because the grammar and word choice shows that you are in no position to put down uneducated people.

I guess some parents trust their kids to keep their pants on. Dating doesn't lead to pregnancy, irresponsible dating and sex does. I have been dating since 16, and sexually active since 20. I know how to protect myself against pregnancy and disease.