One of my friends just passed away from cystic fibrosis and I have no idea how to act, what to wear, or what to say to his family. I know he isn't jewish so its not going to be a jewish wake, and I dont pray so I cant keep his family "in my prayers."
2007-08-31 06:34:38 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
The point of attending the wake, in my opinion, is to show your last respects, and let the family know you cared for your friend and that you will miss your friend.
Once I got to the wake I would take a glance at the crowd and see how everyone else is acting. Probably, everyone will be in small groups talking. Greet his family, introduce yourself to his family members who don't know you, and just say what is in your heart.
For example " I knew John from school. He always made me laugh." You can just keep it short and simple. You can stay as long or as short as you like. When I attend a wake I make a point to say hi to the family and then kind of sneak out the back, I don't usually stay more than an hour.
I usually wear a dress, navy blue or black. Or a pants suit - depending on wear the wake is held.
I am sorry for your loss. I know you don't pray, but I will keep you and your friend's family in MY prayers. It is always hard to lose a friend.
2007-08-31 06:54:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First, you should wear a dark blue or black outfit or suit w/skirt or pants are ok if they're nice looking. To express your sympathies to his family, whatever comes from your heart will be the most appreciated. It doesn't have to be religious, just be sincere. Something like "I'm so sorry for your loss. John was a great guy and nice friend." or whatever memories come to you about him.
Of course this isn't necessary, but if you like you can also send something like a plant/dish garden (something the family can keep as a remembrance of him), or a fruit/cheese basket (something they can snack on at the funeral home if they can't get away for a meal). Or you can make a donation to a charity in his memory. If he died of cancer, donate to the American Cancer Society. If he was an animal lover, donate to a local animal shelter, or the ASPCA.
Sorry you lost your friend!
2007-08-31 14:45:16 · answer #2 · answered by kaz716 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've never been to a wake, but I would think it would be a joyous affair. The point is to celebrate the persons life, right? So I would try to be in that type of mood and help people remember the good things about your friend, and how they aren't in pain anymore.
My sympathies.
2007-08-31 13:48:59 · answer #3 · answered by Tonya in TX - Duck 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just act normal. I typically wear black, but you could wear something semi-casual. Introduce yourself to his parents and tell them if there is ever anything you can do for them, to get a hold of you. It seems weird, but just go with the flow. Sorry for your loss...
2007-08-31 13:44:31 · answer #4 · answered by Jen 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be yourself and be sincere. Wear some slacks and a nice top. Sorry you lost a friend.
2007-08-31 13:46:26 · answer #5 · answered by Soul Shaper 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋