My fiancee' and I were going through some difficult times with lack of communication and general discontent. She went out one night with one of her friends. I found out from that friend that she met this guy and ended up going to the bar with him. On the way to the bar they made out. On there way back they managed to find themselves in an alley where he was able to get her pants off. She said there was never penetration - just that he tried to put it in for a few minutes but didnt and then she said stop and pulled up her pants and "just licked it". Is this a believable story? I'm inclined to believe she is lying and that they did have intercourse. If it were the truth is it cheating...should I end our engagement...I mean is this going to happen again. It is a tough decision and I will make it with my heart but respectful outside opinions are very appreciated.
2007-08-31 05:20:17 · 28 answers · asked by diggittey 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dude, I would drop the s.lut now, if "some guy" can get into her pants within a couple of hours, while she in engaged, then she will cheat on you after you get married. Even if there was no penetration, she had some guys penis in her mouth, and then she kissed you. YES IT IS CHEATING. She will ruin your life if you marry her. If you are having problems now they will only get worse when you get married.
2007-08-31 05:28:14 · answer #1 · answered by buddyj68 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be completely honest this is a 50/50 situation. This is how look at it, if your fiancee' had the courage to go ahead and tell you those details (which when coming from some you love hurts to hear) then she may be telling the truth. It's hard for anyone to believe well ok she did all that but no intercourse! Your first thought get the F%@# out of here!! But if you really look at it why would she go into such detail and not just come out fully with the truth? And yes there is a possibility that she might have left something out so that YOU can't really say well she cheated but if you know her well enough determining that will be easy. It's just the heart that doesn't want to let go of that innocent, only yours person that you knew. Look I'm not saying you should stay with her because really getting into a marriage means being there and being faithful through thick and thin. And if she couldn't get past a rock in the road such as a communication problem then you deserve better. Also I'm not trying to say that it will happen again beacause people can change (especially with the scare of loosing someone they love) but that's a chance that you truely need to think about. Oh yeah and I saw you said this is decision that you will make with your heart, that's not always a good idea. Like I said earlier the heart can be very weak and only see the person for what you want them to be so as much thinking as you're going to do with your heart do with your head too. I'm very sorry to hear that you're going through that I have been through it many times with father of my kids so I know what you mean. Just don't let it take years before you realize it's never going to stop. I wish you the best of luck.
2007-08-31 05:44:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you may be upset if you end the relationship, but think about it she will probally do it again mabey not right away(which is worse since you think she changed) but it probally will happen, I know a dude that cheats all the time and he does this cause his chick is dumb as a box of rocks and forgives him and believes that he wont do it again. I mean why not cheat if you can get away with it. If my fiance (especally since shes my fiance and allready said more or less that I am the one for her and not anybody else which means no more random dick for her.) cheated on me I know no matter how hard it is to do would tell her to kick rocks and to leave me alone. then I would just go and enjoy life as a single dude that can talk to any woman you want without hearing $hit for it. it is kind of a beautiful thing and you never know it may just land you a good girl that wont do $hit like let some random dude that she jsut met take her pants off in an alley behind a bar. I mean thats the kind of thing I would do to some loose chick that I just met and then go tell all my friends about, so we can laugh about her and her buster @ss boyfrien that is at home gettin ready to eat it as soon as she walks through the door. and even if she did just let him lick it, I would flip out cause if you think about it he just licked your Puss dude. how would she react if you just let some chick "lick at it" dude she would never let you live it down. dude your chicks a ho, allways will be so forget about her and move on you'll be happy you did before she lets one of your friends do it too.
2007-08-31 05:41:51 · answer #3 · answered by brent0331 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can't predict whether it will happen again or not, but I can tell you it is possible to forgive & move forward, from experience. But only if she is willing to be completely honest with you & really wants to make your relationship work.
I was engaged & had a child with a wonderful guy, but I was feeling unhappy & I had an affair. We broke up for a while, then I regretted everything horribly, & begged for forgiveness. It took some time to get things back to good, of course, but we now have been married 5 years & have 2 kids & I would never want anything to do with any other man.
If you are really in love with this girl, get together & talk it out!
2007-08-31 05:31:48 · answer #4 · answered by reesecups999 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please beleive that she is cheating and just like a tiger she wont shed here strips she will only hide them, sooner or later they will come back! And whatever made her do this in the first place? wether an arguement or a misunderstanding couples hsould always talk about what is bothering them. If she did it to you once she will do it agian. It doesn't matter if there was penetration or not...SHE WAS IN AN ALLEY WITH ANOTHER MAN WITH HER PANTS DOWN AND HE DID THE LICKY LICKY!!! I beleive you can do much better. God is hsowing you this before you make the mistake into marrying this woman....make the right decision and go find the woman whom you deserve! God Bless!
2007-08-31 05:34:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may have been telling the truth, because why wouldn't she just tell you they humped if she goes so far as to say he "licked it" geez. Um, this all depends on how you are going to feel about this in your future. Will you be able to forgive and forget? Will this always be in the back of your mind? Will you be able to trust her? Some people make mistakes when they are drunk and unhappy, but is this a habit of hers? You should consider everything before you take the plunge. Your not even married yet and she is cheating. What will happen next time you have difficulty in the relationship? because you will! You both need to decide what you really want, and how much you really LOVE eacthother.
2007-08-31 05:27:59 · answer #6 · answered by icedcoffeeaddict 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She cheated on you, regardless of whether there was penetration or was just "some licking".
If she acted like this when you guys were going through a rough spot, then it is bound to happen again.
Also, what kind of person is she that she would put YOU at risk of an STD just because SHE couldn't keep her hands off of some random guy she decided to hook up with in a BACK ALLEY of all things?
Dear god, move on man.
2007-08-31 05:27:27 · answer #7 · answered by BK 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Drop her dude, Believe me, it won't stop there.
End the relationship now, before you get tied up by the law and she ends up with 50% of everything you've worked for your whole life. While you're at work she'll be having sex or getting "licked" by some other guy.
Put your feelings and your heart aside, you don't need all this drama in your life, especially before marriage!
Best of luck and hope you make a good decision.
2007-08-31 05:27:15 · answer #8 · answered by VortexHunter 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK what do YOU want? Really.
Sounds like you want OUT and are searching for excuses.
So screw up the courage and admit to both her - and YOU that you're not ready for the kind of commitment marriage takes.
Of course you'll have to break up with your fiance and all that - but in truth, since you don't trust her or believe her even though she tried to "fess up" as best she could; I'd say do everyone the favor and end the relationship. While painful for everyone - it will be for the best all around.
Oh - and take the blame for it.
2007-08-31 05:32:09 · answer #9 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but since the moment she met up with the guy and went to the bar it is considered cheating. I understand you must love her and of course you are hurt, but in the long run you will decide what is best for you. As for me I would get rid of her and never look back. Good luck on whatever you decide!
2007-08-31 05:26:14 · answer #10 · answered by shygal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋