Do you think this could be post partum depression?

Question

I have this anger thing, where I get really mad at my kids really fast. I have 3 under 5, and pregnant with #4. I'm under a lot of stress, and their father isn't much help as he works 15 hours a day 7 days a week. I only started getting this angry after my first was born. It went away, but as soon as #2 came 18 mos later, it was back, and worse. I actually could envision myself holding a pillow over my older child's face. I never did though. A lot of times, I actually feel like I hate my first born, even though he's only 4. I don't want to be around him, don't want him to talk to me, and I think I yell at him a lot more than the others. I still feel this way, and when I'm calm, and I sit down and actually think about it, it makes me cry and cry, cause how could a mother love one and not the other. Now, fast forward to now when #3 is 1 year old, I feel as if I hate kids, and i can't wait to get away from them. How could a mother feel this way about her kids? I'm scared.

Answer 1

I think you really need help. Ideally you could go to counseling, but the truth is you are being stetched to thin.

Can you improve your support system? How about a religious organization or a church? Can your husband decrease his work schedule? Do you have friends or family to help you?

Look into MOMS Club or MOPPS. You are just exhausted and have no time to your self. These are common feelings for someone in your situation.

I wish I could give you a hug, or at least a trip to the spa. Best wishes, and hang in there. Your kids need you.

Answer 2

You need a break. It seems as if you are under a great deal of stress with those kids. I have been there. I have 2 boys who are 8 now. They both had colic when they were babies from about 2 months till 9 months they would both scream from 4 in the afternoon till at least 10 at night. Father was of no help at all and I cried anf yelled all the time too.
You need to get help. You need to talk to a professional. There are hotlines everywhere if you look on google. Get help before it's too late. By your post, I can tell that you really do love all your kids and want to get help for them more so than for yourself.

Answer 3

You definately need help. It sounds like you have had PPD with your first one, and left untreated, you are escalating. You can get PPD during your pregnancy, and a lot of people do not know that. You need to get some help now, before you have the baby, out of protection for yourself and for your children. There are some great web sites out there for PPD, type it into your search engine, and find an online support group. I had it terrible during my pregnancy with my second one when I went into preterm labor and it got even worse after I had the baby. I never had bad feelings toward my kids, just toward myself. Either way, it can be very devastating. I also came from a family with 5 children and my Mom had 4 under 6, and I grew up with her having PPD that was untreated her whole life. Luckily, we are times when there is help, even for people who cannot afford it. Best of luck to you.

Answer 4

You've practically been pregnant for 4 years! It sounds like post partum to me. I would definatly see you ObGyn about it before you have a total nervous breakdown. It also sounds like you need to have a talk with the father of your children. If you both live together, then you need cry out for help! Even though he works 15 hours a day, see if he can at least relieve you of the small things so that you can focus on the bigger more important things.

Answer 5

You are under a huge amount of stress, and you seem to be carrying the family load all by yourself. No wonder you suffer from anger and depression. Plus your hormones are going nuts. Don't beat yourself up. It's not your fault, and it's common and natural...but that doesn't mean you should ignore it. You should ask your OB-GYN to recommend a mental health person who specializes in post partum depression. Also, your husband needs to know how you feel , and he needs to step up to the plate and find a way to lessen your load.

Good luck. You're not a bad mom, just a way over-stressed mom who needs some backup!

Answer 6

I guess you cannot afford counseling. See the 2nd link on this links page. It tells about getting ppd from not holding your babies enough. When they are held enough (including sleeping with them) it helps you to fulfill your biological needs and your children are great to be around and they do not have many needs.

If your baby dies, you cannot hold your child a lot so you get depressed. But that is normal. You are telling your body that your babies have died by not holding them enough. See the testimonials about this book including La Leche League and Gloria Steinem.

Answer 7

you really need to talk to your doc. it could be ppd or regular depression or just way to much stress. 3 kids under 5 is alot and being pg on top of it isn't helping. call your gyne and talk to him/her about this. you've every right to be scared. i would be. the good thing is, you realize it and want to feel better. call them.

Answer 8

this isn't post partum depression, this is a serious issue and you need therapy, you also need some help, if the hubby is no help, then get a nanny. Why people have kids when one doesn't intend to help at all is a mystery to me, but you are overwhelmed and need help badly.

Answer 9

this could be ppd but it also has to do with the fact that your pregnant most likely your hormones are gonna rage right now and so this all just adds up

Answer 10

yes...ppd...for sure....i just had my first 3 months ago... and i am angry all the time...i'm miserable....not towards my child but towards my husband. i treat him like crap and he is the best husband and daddy ...i don't know why....i just do...i have my theories, but for the most part, i'm just extremely angry filled with a boat load of bitchiness.