Would it be fair/unfair to keep that piece of info to yourself, If not how far is fair or unfair?
To me I think religious preference is somehow personal and as long as its kept for one's self, there should be no problem? I would like to hear opinions from all.
2007-08-30 03:50:16 · 18 answers · asked by ? 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
My wife and I dated for 5 years before getting married and I was never open about me not believing until very recently. It crushed her...She is fine now and we get along great still. She never wants to discuss it though.
I should have been more honest in the begining but I live in the bible belt and well, Im sure you all are very well aware of the amount of christians there are here...
2007-08-30 03:57:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I guess it depends on the people. To me, your religious ideas are the core of your being, that's what gives you the values you live by every day of your life. Not sharing this with someone who might become more than just a 'date' is wrong. You don't have to start talking religion on the first date, but if you start to hit it off and it looks like it could be a serious relationship, it needs to be discussed. If your religions and values clash then you could be in for big trouble down the line. Just my opinion.
2007-08-30 10:56:40 · answer #2 · answered by Cheryl E 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this (like politics) is definitely not a first or even second date conversation. i don't think religious beliefs should come up unless you're serious enough to start talking about a family, because, let's face it, we're usually most opinionated about things when we start thinking about what we want to provide for our kids.
it's a very sensitive issue, and it could easily ruin a relationship if brought up too soon. unless, of course, you met at church or a secular humanism meeting, and you know you have similar views. like you said, it's a personal choice. if your religion or nonreligion is so important to you that you wouldn't even consider dating someone who didn't have the same beliefs, maybe it would be good to get out of the way earlier. but otherwise, no harm, no foul.
2007-08-30 11:04:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The person should be able to tell by your actions and attitude. You should let them know up front though because if you progress in your relationship it will cause problems for you later as both religious and non-religious usually adhere tightly to their belief system and anyone who does not agree with them is either inane or whacked. For a Christian it is not a secret because they are supposed to share the Good News of Christ and what He has done for them. For an Atheist they also share the good news of how intelligent and wonderful they are. And life goes on...Mmm
2007-08-30 11:00:08 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When it comes up, be open and honest. Dating is a way of getting to know one another better. It would be disrespectful to lie to someone you're dating, and I don't believe in living a lie. Don't dance around the subject. If you're curious, ask. It's not like it should be a deep, dark secret. But once you open that door, be prepared to explain your beliefs, too.
2007-08-30 10:54:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you get married, you should discuss it. You need to decide how you'd raise your children and what role religion will have in your lives. Thinking "I'll change them after we're married" will never work. Take them as they are or don't take them as your significant other at all.
Before that, I think its a personal thing that should only be brought up if it somehow comes up in conversation.
2007-08-30 11:06:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your religion is an important part of your life, then you have a duty to be honest with the person upfront.
Why wait until they are emotionally tied in with you, to let them know you worship Zeus and believe that it is your destiny to rule the Agean sea?
2007-08-30 11:02:01 · answer #7 · answered by ɹɐǝɟsuɐs Blessed Cheese Maker 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally have no problem speaking of by beliefs.Some time in the conversation beliefs should come up.Never marry an unbeliever.I really believe this, for eventually the differences will come between you.
2007-08-30 11:01:48 · answer #8 · answered by punkin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should probably mention it fairly early, before you get too attached to each other -- plenty of religions are mutually exclusive and non-negotiable; and it's likely to be a BIG point of contention if you two ever get to the point of settling down and raising kids ("OK, Mohammed is the prophet of God on even-numbered days, and Jesus gets to be the prophet on the odd ones...")
2007-08-30 10:56:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The last three men that I saw I asked them up front about religion.
I won't waste my time with a fundie. Some things are NOT negotiable.
2007-08-30 10:57:11 · answer #10 · answered by Gorgeoustxwoman2013 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋