Wedding, gifts, and Kids?

Question

OK I am going to a wedding in El Paso TX, We are Bahai and we do things in the Non traditional way, but I am bringing 2 of my Kids ages 1 year and nearly 3year old, My kids are usually well behaved and My 3 year old is much better than most.
My 1 year old is , typical 1 year old but will eat himself into oblivion .

So what do you think , Ask them to help us get a babysitter or bring them to the party, Get a hotel or stay with the family, and what do i get them for a gift or give money and how much,( they are my husbands friends I have met them 2 or 3 times) they are having the reception at The El Paso Club there is one review online but it is very non desciptive as to dress, and atmosphere. I am from NY originally and now CT Travel is going to be about 800 dollars.

Any help, and any opinions will be helpful.

Thanks

Meg

the invitation Didn't say and Family but they do know we have babies and want us to bring them to TX, I just don't know if they would prefer we left them with a sitter, I don't know them enough to feel comfortable asking them ANYTHING let alone can my kids come ,ect.,
I want my husband to ask them but he just Assumes things will be fine, and that we'll stay at another relatives home
(relative of the bride) I want him to ask them specifically but before i pester him to call and ask i want to know what everyone thinks about it all.
I need to know where she is registered aswell,

We are Bahai's and We don't generally have the traditional types of weddings
With the photographers and flowers and White dress ECT. but you never know right , so i want to be certain. Either way I have to bring my boys, even if it means I don't attend the ceremony and stay with them, while my husband goes, I wouldn't be offended to have to stay at home that day. I couldn't leave them alone for a week .

Answer 1

Take them with you! Weddings are for families and friends of all ages! Stay on your own, in some sort of hotel or motel - there are nice, clean chains everywhere.

Answer 2

It ought to be understood that if the name is not on the invitation, the person is not invited. However, it's also specifically understood between you and the couple, you say, that you are bringing your children with you, and at those ages they can hardly be left alone in a hotel room for several hours.

Also, you cannot simply invite yourself to stay with people who aren't expecting it and are in the middle of a major life event. You don't know the dress code. You don't know where - if anywhere - the couple is registered and wish to know.

In short, there is a great deal of confusion going on here that can all be solved by one phone call.

Call someone in the family and find out whether you're expected to bring your children to the reception or find alternate care for them (and unless it's offered freely, it's not really okay to ask someone else to pay all or part of your babysitter's cost...but it's perfectly okay to ask for recommendations in town since you can't be expected to know any child care workers in the area or their usual price), where - if anywhere - the happy couple is registered or what they might prefer if they aren't, whether there's room at the inn for you or if you need to make other arrangements...five minutes on the phone will answer all your questions without putting anyone out too badly.

In the bride's shoes, I'd want someone who had that many questions to call and get the answers in advance. It really wouldn't have been any trouble to answer them a week or two before the wedding. The day before, though, or the day of, would have been more problematical because my concentration was elsewhere.

Answer 3

well were they invited on the invitation? if they were, then you can definatley bring them. brides and grooms put a lot of thought into whether they invite children or not, so odds are if your children are invited so are others. you can definatley bring them.

however, since they are so young, do you feel like they will take away from your enjoying the wedding and spending time with your long distance friends? if so, then by all means, ask them to help you find a sitter, i would! They are from the area and should be prepared for stuff like this! It's just a matter of how comfortable you would feel leavign your kids with somebody you dont know. Do you trust your friends' judgement in people

I went to a college friend's wedding in CT and gave $150, but it would be up to you as to how close you are to the people.

Answer 4

Were the kids specifically invited? If not, it would be very, VERY rude of you to bring them to a party. Either leave them at home with a sitter, or call the couple and ask them to help you find a reliable sitter in their area.

If the kids' names are on the invitation envelope, though, that's really up to you. Will they behave at the wedding? If not, consider a sitter.

Give them whatever gift you can afford.

As for where to stay ... I personally vote for a hotel, if you can swing it, so that you're not in anyone's hair.

Answer 5

What does the invitation say?

If it says "Mr and Mrs Smith" then only you and your husband are invited.

If it says "Mr and Mrs Smith and Family" then your children are invited.

Under NO circumstances should you bring your kids to the wedding if the invitation was worded without "and Family".

Since you have to travel quite a distance, you can either give them a simple little gift or just give them a nice card, as gifts are never required whether you can attend the ceremony/reception or not, and they should take into consideration the expenses needed to get there.

As for the attire, if there is no hint at what it should be, talk to the bride or groom or their parents what the dress code is.

Answer 6

Congratulations, you so much be getting excited! Heres just a little inspiration of what I'm doing. I'm going to make a children desk and feature the reward baggage at the desk. I'm additionally going to shop for this paper you'll uncover at Wal-Mart. It's particularly lengthy which you place over the desk. The children can draw everywhere it. Just an inspiration. =) In your difficulty, I might positioned the baggage subsequent to the situation playing cards. I'd have their names written on it, child like. Really daring and vivid.

Answer 7

You should not bring them to a party uninvited. Period. You shouldn't even ask for clarification...just leave them at home. If you ask, you put your host in the predicament of having to say yes.