Lately I've been doing some self reflection on why after two years, I'm still single. I have a good job

Question

a nice house & car, I'm responsible. I met a man and we went on one date and now three months later, we went out again last night. And while I've made it more than clear to him I wasn't just interested in a hookup but a relationship. We went to dinner and came back to my house to hang out. Well, after three hours of constantly fending him off, he left. My question is what is it about men and sex? why do they persist even when you pretty much say that's not what I want. I'm getting a little frustrated with the whole dating scene, I can't tell you how many men I've dated and well..it always ends up with them trying to get a piece. I hold fast to what I want....whats wrong???

Answer 1

You're not by chance meeting all of your disappointing dates
at the same location, are you? It sounds like they're all cut from the same mold. I'd stop letting myself get picked up at
a club or bar or anything like that where liquor is served, and
change where you normally like to hang out for relaxation.
You need to find other popular spots for recreation where
singles might go for fun. Even if you have to take up that
sport or recreation. There's that song lyric, "Looking for love,
in all the wrong places?" that's what this reminds me of.
Don't be looking so actively, and I'm sure they'll come to you.
From my past experience, I'd always meet a guy by surprise
from common, everyday places. Never once did I meet some-
one at a club or bar or a place where people were on the
make. If you go to a place like that, people assume you are
also on the make. You don't go there to find nice guys.Or
girls. You meet the great guys at the grocery store, maybe
even the library, a nursery to buy a plant. Anyplace where
people are doing their thing normally on their time off from
working. Just relax and don't hang out where you've been
going. Stay busy, and go about your normal routine and I'll
bet when you aren't looking or thinking about meeting some-
one, into your life, he'll walk and he'll be well worth waiting
for. I know, mine did, and we've been married for 45 years!

Answer 2

Nothing's wrong. U just haven't found the right guy yet. Not all guys want sex from a girl right away. Some actually do wait to get in a relationship that's meaningful before they ask for it. These guys are generally "nice guys" and go unnoticed by most women. So goes the saying, nice guys finish last. These men don't pressure u either, they respect ur decision to wait. They also have a moral code of their own, and will abide by it, and rarely waiver. They are the marrying kind. But u might not want to take a guy back to ur place. Even if it is to hang out. Temptation is there, so to them, there's a possibility they'll get lucky. Oh sure, u'll say no now, but after they talk to u a bit, or maybe even get u a bit tipsy, u'll cave, and thank 'em the next morning. But if u just stick to resteraunts, coffeeshops, and stuff, and don't even entertain going back to urs or his place, or a hotel room or something like that, he'll either leave u, or respect u and stick around. But the pressure will be off for a while, and then, one day, when the right guy least expects it, u'll want to bang him for a change. But u've gotta prove to him ur worth the wait, and he'll appreciate it, and u for it.

Answer 3

Sex is different on many levels to men as compared to women, and I believe this is because of their biology. In general, most men will go after "a piece" if they think they can get it.

However, there are men out there who will treat a woman with respect and may even be too shy or intimidated to make the first move. If you feel you always attract the same type of man, it might be worth examining why. Is this your "type"? Do you meet them all in the same sorts of places? Do you give them signals that you are not aware of? A friend may be able to give you valuable feedback.

This is in no way to say that it is your fault for how these men behave...but sometimes without being aware we attract a certain sort of person to us...maybe because they fulfill some sort of need or expectation we have.

Then again, it's also possible you are just having bad luck and meeting a string of Mr. Wrongs. It happens.

Answer 4

you are not wrong, it seems that you are just picking men that turn out to be creeps. There are some nice men out there.

You have done well for yourself so be sure not to feel bad about anything. Psychologically some men may see that you have done well, and feel threatened by it, their 'unconscious' response in some cases may be to try and get you into bed.

If a man is interested in you for companionship, he will understand your beliefs and still be interested in you. This will happen one day. Until then keep your chin up and keep fending off the 'losers'

Answer 5

It's NOT you, hon. I have a daughter who has the same problem, and she reports the same issue her girl friends have.
It seems that after the H.S. and college dating scene has past, the still single guys ( and the newly single ones) are horny as ever, and think that the ladies are too. They are still single because they are not interested in a l.t. relationship ( like marriage). That does not diminish their need for sexual release, however.
Moreover, (from what I hear) they don't have a very hard time of finding what they want, either!
Stand your moral high ground; the right guy will come along, provided that you make yourself visible!

Answer 6

well even though it may seem like all men are the same maybe your just running into the wrong ones...some guys will still try to pursue a sexual relationship with you early on just to see if you will go for it because even though it seems like thats all guys want, when a man is looking for someone to be serious with, he's not going to want someone that will give in easily...so dont give up, but i've learned its better to let love come to you becaus if you look for it, you'll probably have a harder time finding it

Answer 7

Unfortunately there are alot of jerks out there but not all guys are like that. Even though I don't do what your date did I still get accused of just wanting sex, even though I never said anything about it or acted in a forward or rude way. It gets frustrating for guys too.

Answer 8

My friend, being single is just good good. I have been single for couple years as well, and I never was this much happy. Why get in all those mingling thing...Just enjoy the life with your FRIENDS(one who stays with you forever).

Life is good.
Being single is better.
Good Friends are THE best.

Answer 9

Like I said, self contradictory. You told him you wanted a relationship, and he obviously had so much to drink that he thought you wanted sex, too and he certainly thought he wanted it. If it happens again, concede to him.

Answer 10

sex is not as meaningfull to most men