How do you plan a wedding/handfasting ceremony for a Pagan (Witch) marrying a Non-denominatial Christian?

Question

I'm asking because I am a Neo-Wiccan and my Christian boyfriend and I have been talking about marriage, and I know that both of us are going to want to incorporate our faiths into the ceremony if it happens. So just out of curiousity, since I'm a neurotic planner, does anyone have any tips on how to go about doing that?

As a Neo-Wiccan, I follow a lot of the concepts of Wicca, but I do not belong to a coven and I incorporate my own personal beliefs into my religion.

Answer 1

I would firstly start with having your ceremony outdoors, like in a nice garden because I guess it's 'neutral'.That works because a lot of Christians have garden weddings and Witches are all about the outdoors and nature aren't they? It would provide you with a beautiful setting for your ceremony and be special too.
As for the actual ceremony, I would suggest you have a civil ceremony and include a few Christian and Wiccan readings and rituals. This means you can have a celebrant marry you, and they wouldn't be for one faith or the other, they are also 'neutral'. You could have your ceremony exactly how you want because civil ceremonies are very flexible and you can do just about anything you want these days in a civil ceremoney. I'm have a celebrant marry me next year as we are both not religious and we are just having a nice simple ceremony. But to incorporate your two faiths, you could have a bible reading or prayer to incorporate the Christian faith and you could also have a Wiccan reading and maybe candle lighting ceremony to incorporate your faith. Find out what elements there are in traditional Christian and Wiccan ceremonies and pick the things you like the most to put in your. Remember, your ceremony is supposed to reflect you, the couple, so make it all about you and your beliefs and it will be lovely. Congratulations and good luck!

Answer 2

LOL I actually used the ceremony that wenwas76 directed you to (with a few personal alterations). It's a beautiful oath that has so many Pagan elements that I didn't understand why the preacher didn't see it! He probably didn't want to.

Anyway, being Pagan, and his family being Christian, we decided to use both elements, he, however, was all for a total Pagan ceremony. Because I didn't want to have to explain to his parents my beliefs (I wasn't quite sure of them at the time anyway. I knew I was Pagan, but what branch? I hasn't yet found one for me). So using a Christian (Baptist? I think it was) preacher and the Pagan oaths, we were wed outside under the trees by a pond - it was beautiful. For the reception, a candle lighting ceremony joining the two families was done (at the request of his mother, lol). Later, privately, we took the oath again adding a knot-tying ceremony.

Good luck!!

Answer 3

I would try to keep it as simple as possible, but allow room for both religions. As I'm not sure exactly where both beliefs are for the two of you, it would be hard to give any ideas as to how to incorporate them.

Personally, I was married in a Christian church by a retired preacher (as there weren't any legal Pagan Priests in our area at the time) and my husband wasn't/isn't interested in any kind of religion (but he loves the Pagan holidays)... we chose the church basically because it was traditional in both of our families.... though we did do a personal "handfasting" ritual between the two of us later.

Answer 4

My sister is a Unitarian and there are many pagans that attend her church. The Unitarian church incorporates beliefs from all religions, it is a really neat philosophy.

So my suggest would be to find a Unitarian church. The actual ceremony is really not different. You still have the procession, the welcome/greeting by your officiant, any special readings you would like, exchange of vows and handfasting ceremony, then the conclusion and introduction then the recessional.

Answer 5

I am also pagan and my boyfriend and family is christian i found this sight that has a hand-fasting ceremony that doesn't look like one here is the link
http://www.magicalomaha.com/universalhandfasting.htm

Answer 6

Honey, I don't know anything about your religion other than you are not worshiping the One True God but I doubt your boyfriend is an actual christian if he is willing to marry someone who does not share his belief in Christ. He may have grown up in a christian church but I'm wondering is he has actually made a commitment to Christ. If he has truly accepted the free offer of Salvation and yet plans to marry a Pagan he is going against everything Christ stands for and died for.and if indeed he is a believer in Christ then he will suffer the rest of his life knowing that your eternal life will not be with him in the Kingdom of God. If he loves you the way a husband should he will have those feelings.

I know you can not hear my tone but I am not being mean or hateful. Simply stating what believers in Christ know. That our eternity is secured through the blood sacrifice of Christ and that your 'mixed' marriage will be filled with his heartache longing for you to accept his Savior. You two may be sweet, wonderful, tender people who make a great couple in this world but your eternity will not be spent together. And he will always long for your conversion. If he really is a christian. Convert before you marry or do him a favor and call it off. Of course if he is a christian in name only it won't matter. Until the end.

I hope for the best for you both.

Answer 7

What the heck heck is a Neo-Wiccan ?

Answer 8

i agree with higherground. a christian shouldnt be marrying a wiccan to begin with, big mistake for someone who is truly a christian (it's completely against the christian faith)

Answer 9

You don't. A Christian should not be "unequally yoked" with an unbeliever, and that includes you, sweetie.