My boyfriend just left for boot camp for the Marines and im really worried about him.?

Question

He has been active in the past but hes not the most athletic guy plus I know they are really mean in boot camp.
What am I supposed to say in the letters besides i miss yous and i love yous
and also how can i cope with him gone, while im still here with all my friends.
and if anyone was a marine or is can you tell me how boot camp is?
Thanks

Answer 1

First all thank your boyfriend for his service to the country and thank you for supporting him!

There is a great support network for Marine families, girlfriends and wives. The recruit message board is http://www.recruitparents.com/forum/default_group.asp but check out the website because its a great place to ask questions.

Someone recommended sending pictures, but don't do it. The drill instructors open the mail (especially if they feel pictures are in) and either will crumble up the pictures beyond recognition or they will embarass the hell out of him. If you choose to send him pictures try to put them on the computer then print them out on a regular piece of paper. Sending him cookies, care packages, etc is not a good idea either while he is in boot camp. Just do letters, TRUST ME. :)

As long as he has the heart and determination he will do fine in boot camp. In your letters continue to do what you are doing with love yous and miss yous but you can include things about the outside world to him too. You can include articles about things happening around the world, football/baseball game stats (especially if he has a favorite team!). When my husband was in boot camp (I was only a girlfriend at the time) he loved the articles. Especially, since he was a wrestler and the olympics was going on so I sent him news articles about that.

I'm going to recommend two books to you...
1. Married to the Military (tons of great info about everything you need to know...it was a life saver!)
http://www.amazon.com/Married-Military-Survival-Girlfriends-Uniform/dp/0743255542
2. Into the Crucible (about USMC boot camp...leading up to the crucible and after....your boyfriend will love that you know a little about what he has gone through- my husband loved that I knew so much about his experience - acroynyms and everything).
http://www.amazon.com/Into-Crucible-Making-Marines-Century/dp/0891416579/ref=sr_1_3/104-6825556-1635902?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1188424728&sr=1-3

As for how you can cope...you just do! Keep busy with work/school/family/friends etc. I made a scrapbook for him when he was in boot camp and gave it to him on graduation day. That made me feel close to him while he was gone. Also, we planned a little trip for after boot camp for just the two of us. It was fun writing back and forth what we were going to do, stay, eat, etc. It was something we both were looking forward to.

Remember it's only three months and if you truly love him and want to spend the rest of your life with him its 3 months out of a lifetime together. Plus, boot camp gets you ready for when he goes to his MOS school and then on deployment which is 6-8 months.

Boot camp is going to be the best and worst time of his life, but by you being there through letters to support him will make the days so much better. The best feeling after a long day of getting yelled at and training hard is coming back to the barracks to a letter from someone they love. Family day and graduation day will be such an amazing and proudest moments of your lives. Good luck! Semper Fi!

Answer 2

You take one breath and then another and next thing you know it gets a little easier. I know that it doesn't seem like the pain will get any better because that's how I felt when my boyfriend was gone. It helped me to to things to plan for when he would be back - so I made a big count-down calender for when I would see him again, I planned for making the trip out to see him graduate, I wrote poetry about him becoming a Marine, and I wrote letters to him telling him how proud I was of him. We've now been married for 6 years and we've gone through so many separations and for me going to bed and waking up without him is still the hardest thing. It's not pathetic at all. I'm a worrier too and you're not going to be able to just shut that off but hopefully it won't come through in your letters to him. You're his connection to the real world and you could write about how your workouts or classes are going, something funny you saw on tv, reminisce about a great date you had, and he'll love all of it. As long as it's positive - he wants to know that you love and miss him but he also needs to know that you're not falling apart. That's why it's great that you can go on here and vent - that way you can be uplifting to him. Anyway, I hope this helps.

Answer 3

I went through boot camp in "75"it was 1975 and I put in my 20yrs. Sending pictures is not real bad if you want to be put on the hog board, so every one in the plt can dream of you. go ahead(you might cause a few wet dreams)the DI's can have fun , as for food send enough for his whole plt and the DI. DI's would take there share and then made who ever got the care package eat the rest(don't get any crumbs on my deck" then you had to drink a canteen full of warm water and then do jump in jacks or bend and thrust until he got tried(not you but the DI). At mail call we was called into the class room, were by they check each persons mail. If it had any bulges or the return address was not were it should be, it was fun time until he got tried again(hell of way to get you in shape)If it warrant it we went to happy valley and made it rain,or done sunshine excises. Lots of fun.
He's not going to have much time to write, I never did, had to find any moment I could, church on Sundays, I could writer on the handouts, some times you could stay for other services(not a good idea).
Tell him you love him and are looking forward to his coming home a US Marine. Getting male from home is the best part of boot camp or any time no matter were you are at.

Answer 4

When I was in boot camp , we had a few hours on Sunday to write a letter . I would encourage his family and friends to write a letter because the letters were very very important and the only communication with the outside world .

Try to send some baked goods ,chocolates or maybe a magazine if they still allow it .

Answer 5

My son was in boot camp. It's really hard for them. I never thought that my rough tough kid would be sooo homesick. It would break my heart. So, I got together with a school in my town and had all the kids write him a letter, whether they knew him or not. Don't you know, my son wrote all 30 kids a personal letter back. In his letter he told each kid that he was giving their address and letter to another soldier who did not have family or who didn't receive mail. These soldiers could not have been happier. The kids would send care packages. When I finally went to GA for the graduation, every one of those soldiers came up and personally thanked me for introducing them to their new sister or brother. Being proactive in an effort to help these guys will not only make you feel better but before you know it he'll be coming home.

Good Luck.

Answer 6

Lots of great suggestions from everyone.

I was in boot camp during an earlier "police action" in the 70's. Here's what I know from experience to tell you.

A.) Boot camp will tear you down and build you back up. The drilling and physical exercise will be good for him. Sure, he’ll probably be very sore the first couple weeks, but he’ll get accustomed to it real fast.

The mental aspect of boot camp, is what may be a shocker for him. The DI’s come at you from all angles and don’t let up. The purpose of that is to weed out those who have low resistance to stress. Better to find out in boot, than in the field.

B.) Sending mail to boot camp, I’d stick to letters. If you want to send a photo, make it a small wallet size or something printed on say ink jet paper (but still small).

Do not send Hallmark cards or anything like that, if you do, you might as well paint a target on his rear end. The DI’s focus in on that stuff and in boot, it’s to your advantage to fly under the radar.

Don’t send baked good’s, my DI’s would take some first, let the guy who received the package take one and the rest was given away to everyone else. They said the barracks weren’t a f*cking pantry and if anyone dropped a crumb, the decks were getting scrubbed. Somehow, they always saw a crumb on the floor.

Keep your letters light hearted, avoid dreary news. If you decide to break up with him, please do it after he’s out. Your letters don’t have to be 20 page wonders, stay to one or two pages. When I was in boot, one of the guys received a small postcard almost everyday, she girlfriend used them like a journal, then she mailed them to him. He looked forward to them and she felt it kept them close.

If he’s a sports nut, or NASCAR fan, etc, include clippings with your letters. That would really be special and help make his day.

Don’t be disappointed if the letters are far and few between from him. Usually Sunday is the only day, where he’ll have any time to write a letter. During the week, just about all of his time is controlled by the DI’s. His first couple of weeks, he probably won’t have the energy to write. At the end of the day, all you want is rack time to recoup.

C.) It’s hard but don’t become a hermit, because you feel guilty being free and he’s in boot. That’s the last thing you want to do, how can your letters be upbeat, if you’re depressed? I wouldn’t talk a lot in your letters about going out, as it could be construed the wrong way.

The only other thing I’d be aware of, if I were you, is to keep an eye out for the vultures. The vultures are the guy’s who are interested in you, but stayed away because your guy was around. They come out of the woodwork and try to sabotage your relationship with your guy, to get in good with you. I’ve seen that one happen, more time’s than I care to remember.

Well young lady, good luck and my many thanks to you and your boyfriend for your service to our country. Don’t pay attention to the nay-sayers, they want to enjoy freedom without paying for the bill.

Answer 7

Just tell him whats going on at home, with his friends, etc.

As to coping, now would be a good time, to start getting some outside interest of your own.

You need to be able to have a life, when he's not there,

They didn't tell you, but while he's growing as a person in Boot, you also have to grow as a person while he's gone.

Start thinking about what if you get married and are stationed at a marine base, and he goes on a deployment.

You won't have your circle of friends around and he will be gone.

So you have to start developing your own interest now, so you will have them later.

Answer 8

Its a hard life in boot camp, be patient because there will be times he wont be able to communicate with you very much, the best thing for you to do is continue to let him know how you feel about him and cheer for him on the side lines, people in marine core boot camp need all the support they can get, keep writing him, it will keep his moral up.
It help me make it through tremendously.

Answer 9

It is a challenge no matter what shape you are in or how prepared you think you are. But he will make it thru if he really wants to. Just be supportive. Keep him posted on what's going on around you. Of course it is OK to say "I miss you" but make it more about how great it will be when he returns rather than how bad it is at the moment not being together. Keep living your life. Some things may change but the important ones will remain constant.

Answer 10

boot camp is not that hard its mostly mental, as long as your boyfriend does not give up. as for letters just write him as much as you can about anything. it doesn't even matter what you say as long as you send him a lot of mail. in boot camp mail is really the only thing you have to look forward to that and chow. he can get mail everyday except for Sundays what he would probably like is to get a letter every day from you. i went to marine corps book camp back in 2001 and i still have all the mail that was sent to me in book camp. so yeah you write him and try to get your friends to write him