Guys!!!! Does just friends always mean just friends???

Question

(misspretty) I couldn't answer your questions because I did not have enough room. So I am answering a question with a questions.
I am going through the same situation. I think that with anything there is a risk, the guy will end up keeping you as a friend or decide to go further and have a relationship. I think that this guy can see that you are a challenge because you haven't slept with him. This is the same thing with me I haven't slept with the guy and he calls me once every couple of weeks or months just to see how I'm doing. Sometimes I feel that he really wants to be my friend until he stops playing the field so he can have a back up. I don't know. I don't think guys and girls can really be friends after you have had feelings from the beginning. Anyway, I think you have to decide if you want to wait for this guy, or move for word and is it worth the heart ache.

Answer 1

The problem happens that friendships GROW, its a natural phonemana that the more time you spend with someone the more you'll feel for them, weather those are good feelings are bad feelings is up to the individual relationship, but lets just say as long as the good feelings are strong you well have a deeper bond. The problem exsist in our cultures, and many more, that we can't allow different sex relationships to grow to much unless were willing to comment, becasue quite frankly are pride and view of love can't handle it. See the truth comes that we have the ability within are hearts to love so many people, now this doesn't mean have a wife and girlfriends, but it does mean that we can make incredibly intense relationships were we can have physical love without it having to be a commentment. The ideal of commentment has caused a problem in male-female relationship because ether there "just friends" are there "intense lovers" this division leaves NO room for the multitude of relationships that can be had from such a situation. Because of this most male-female relationships are ether stagnanted are allowed to move TO FAST. Which ether, or, will cause an eventually deteration, and a breaking down of that bond. So really it isn't that the feelings breck the relationships, its are inablitiy both as males and females, to healthy handle these feelings that cause it to end. Its nothing more then the nature of love, you can't stop it because once you have you've destroied the relationship. Besides in there own way, friends are lovers, they care and feel for each other, just because friends don't have sex and lovers do, doesn't make the relationship stronger, besides if it worked that way we wouldn't have a 75% divorce rate. But the saddest thing is how it limits are relationships and our abilities to survive in this social struture..... but hey we can fight it, I have, and its made quite an intense bitter/sweet experience out of my relationships and I wouldn't do it any other way. Not to say I look to have sex with my females friends, but thru the process of simply relating honestly, if that happens, I want get hung up on it, and the matter still remains, no person can be better then anyone else, its unique, special, and intense (if you let it) with anyone, such is the nature of the heart.... I simple say this becasue if both parties in a relationship can understand that the love should be UNCONDITIONAL, and not romantic, we'd have better interpersonal relationships and less of the problem you two are dealing with...