how do i politely decline an offer of fast food from a stubborn woman? Please advise..my tummy cant handle it!

Question

i work for a 95 yr old woman, and every week or so her daughter will stop by and 'take us to lunch'.

It is ALWAYS to pizza hut, and as i dont like pizza to begin with, she always throws crude comments to me if i start to decline "Oh I see, trying to watch your figure" "Youre on a diet then?" etc etc (By the way, shes about 5'5 and 180lbs, I'm 5'7 and 110 but i dont 'diet')

Anyways.. if i have to sit down to one more ham & cheese pizza i'm going to scream. My stomach does not do well with fast food, and i hardly ever eat it. At first i was being nice, but i really just cant handle it.

What is a polite way to say that I would rather stay at home to clean or read while she takes her mother to lunch?

I cant use the 'oh i think you should spend more time together' cause she doesnt even talk to her mom when we go out. She refuses to go anywhere else either because 'its moms favorite restaurant'.

She is very stubborn, so i'll probably need a rebuttal or two if you have em.

Also, she pays..so i cant exactly order something else because im not paying. And i dont want to spend money going out to eat when i can just stay home & eat instead of spending money

Answer 1

Tell her the truth - it's always the best policy.

You could say something like:
"Thank you so much for the invite. I should have mentioned it sooner, but pizza hut doesn't agree with my digestive system. I know that is your mom's favorite restaurant and I wouldn't dream of depriving her of that visit. If it's all the same with you, I'd prefer to stay here while you two go and have a chance to visit. This way, I can be sure I'm available to be of btter assistance to your mother instead of worrying about having to stay in the restroom."

Hope this helps. It can be broken up to use pieces as rebuttal.

Answer 2

I KNOW! I don't eat that food either, it makes me puke- it's bad for you, it stinks, and you shouldn't eat that stuff EVER! Did you see supersize me? I felt it was my vindication- my whole life I have been telling people that food is dangerous, and this movie proves it.

I have a lot of experience with this, I will not eat that stuff under any circumstances.

How about: I am allergic to milk, and throw up when I eat it. I didn't want to tell you because it's SOOOO humiliating, but eating the pizza isn't worth vomitting at night, no matter how good it is. It makes me feel bad to go to lunch and watch you eat stuff I wish I could have, but know makes me sick.

Rebuttal:

I am not lactose intolerant, I am allergic, so the pills don't work. I've been like this my whole life, and I have talked to doctors. You just learn to live with it. The doctor also said the vomitting causes a lot of damage, so I really have to be careful (look sad when you say this)

Don't get into the dieting thing- I am actually trying to knock off a few pounds, but people just don't accept this response. Don't get into a confrontation with her, it isn't worth it. Some people think it's OK to eat garbage and just don't understand. If I am going to splurge on calories it will be on actual food!

Answer 3

Hmmm....What about saying that you have personal matters that need to be taken care of during your lunch hour? If they ask what those may be, just say that you want to keep that private. They don't have to know what you do on your own free time.

Another suggestion would be to be honest with them and let them know that the restaurant upsets your stomach. Tell them that you have been diagnosed as lactose intolerant or IBS or something....ANYTHING.

A final suggestion would be to continue going, out of politeness, and just order whatever you want off of the menu.

Larger people tend to want others to eat the same way they do. I heard that on the radio recently. It's like large people stick together b/c they have the same eating habits and they are comfortable sharing those habits with people like them. That theory goes for slimmer people.

Think about it...Do you ever see a large person eating with a health conscience person?

Answer 4

Just say, "No, I really need to clean the house." Ignore her comments. You could say that you all ready ate. You could say that you got sick the last time and dont want to risk it again. Of course that would be lying. You could say that you have plans, which technically is true... you have plans NOT to eat with them!

Be firm and as nice as patience allows. Dont let her in your house. It is easier to get rid of someone if they are on your front porch instead of in your living room. If it is a phone call, then hang up while YOU are talking in mid-sentence. This will make it seem like an accident or phone problem. Just dont answer for a while after you do this though (or if you do, say "Hello" a couple of times like you cant hear anyone and hang up again.)

Answer 5

if your stomach is bothered by it just tell her that. Mention how you enjoy the time and it is nice of her to offer, but your tummy is tender and the sauce and cheese no longer sit well with you.
Also you could bring up the topic BEFORE she invites you out. You could make a comment about another food bothering your stomach and tell her then that you are noticing certain foods don't go down well and sort of as a side note say something about not going out to pizza again because of how sensitive you are becoming.
Good luck!

Answer 6

Polite no thank-you's - beginning with my favorite:

Thank you but I honestly have made other plans today. I'm meeting a friend for lunch. It doesn't matter if your friend happens to be "you"

Thank you, but my tummy is giving me trouble lately and a rich pizza is simply not going to sit well today.

Yes. I'm trying to watch what I eat. DR's orders. I'm really not able to explain but my DR says to watch what I eat. I think it has something to do with cholesterol - isn't that funny since I know I'm trim? But that's what the DR says.

Answer 7

Tell her just what you said here. Greasy food doesn't agree with you. You might also add that you take pride in your appearance and don't want to end up looking like her.

Answer 8

If it were me, and she asked if I was dieting, I'd say something like "yes, you know how THAT goes!" (regardless of whether I was or not!) smile knowingly, and leave it at that.

If she persisted, I'd say something like "I'd love to, but you know, my ulcers are really giving me a lot of grief, and my doctor advised me to stay away from greasy foods altogether. Thank you for thinking of me, though!"

Answer 9

Say, "I'm sorry, my stomach just can't handle fast food. I'm sure you don't want the details."

If she persists, say "It's really not a pretty sight. I just can't eat fast food."