Need one more bridemaid??

Question

Do I ask a friend that was so depressed when she heard the news she couldn't call me and ask me how it happened like everyone else did, do I ask a friend that a traveled with but have not really been close with anymore, or do I ask someone that lives far away but is a really good friend, but I want her and her boyfriend to come to the wedding and enjoy not be in the wedding.?????

I am an only child and I already ask his sister. I could ask my cousin but she lives in Kentucky and the wedding will be in NY. Have not seen her in 10 years.

I am close with the second one I am close with but lately has not been returning my calls but said she will help with whatever I need. And she will be singing in it sooooooo.

I did sent out a mass e-mail but I talked to her earlier in the day before it happened and she sounded depressed so did not want to make her worse, plus she told me she was true drunk to call anyways and was having a rough time with the news. She said she didn't think she was suppose to call.

Answer 1

Don't put someone in your wedding just because you feel you have to meet a quota.

You don't sound like you want any of these girls in your wedding.

Answer 2

Seems like you arn't that fond of any of those people from your descriptions of your relationships with them!

Nobody likes being asked to be a bridesmaid because you "need a balanced wedding party" or "they will fit in the dress"

So why don't you just have an unbalanced wedding party instead of alienating people that you obviously don't care about even more. If you don't have a single female friend, why don't you ask a guy to be your bridesmaid.

edit:

As far as the friend that didn't call you: Didn't you send mass text messages announcing your engagment? Maybe she thought that it was rude that you didn't call her in person? I didn't tell anybody else until I could FINALLY talk to my BFF on the phone (she was working away from where she lives) becasue I wanted her to hear it from ME first.. not thru the grapevine...

Answer 3

I agree...I just got married and I was so upset that I had one person in my wedding just because I wanted to meet a quota! If you are not happy to ask one of the woman then don't! The best man can already be standing up front and walk out alone or a groomsman can! It's no big deal! Besides, the details are not going to go as planned anyhow! Like my flower girl and ring boy ran away and screamed mommy and had a panic attack and then my one bridesmaid walked right on the others' heels, my music skipped, I practically ran down the isle, exc. so don't worry about it...it goes so fast anyhow, the importnat thing is that your husband is there! If you anf him are there, no one else really matters! The people come to see you anyhow! Best of luck! Keep us updated!

Answer 4

If you really want/need to have one more bridesmaid, I would ask the friend that lives furtherest away, because she and you are closer buds. But, the only thing with asking someone who lives far away, is they won't be able to take part in the traditional bridesmaid duties (hosting bridal party/bachelorette party) & it'll be harder to get the correct dress, shoes, and know how the day will be. I really wouldn't try to get one more bridesmaid, only because in the end, you don't REALLY want them to be that much apart of YOU & YOUR husband's special day. I only had 2 BM's: my best friend since kindergarden and my husband's brother's wife - and when I look back on it, sometimes I wish I had only asked my best friend. The other girl didn't do much to make me feel excited about my day.

Answer 5

Don't ask the depressed friend.

Don't ask someone you are no longer close to.

Ask the good friend who lives far away, first talk to her and ask her if she would like to, and state that it is ok if you decline, since you understand she is so far away, if not be in the wedding she will definitely be invited as well as her boyfriend.

Or go without "one more bridesmaid".

Answer 6

You don't actually 'need' another bridesmaid, and it doesn't sound much as though you actually want any of these ladies in your wedding.

Unless there's someone else you want at your side, just leave the wedding party as it is and make your plans based on that.

And don't worry about it if your guy winds up with more attendants than you do. Bridesmaids and groomsmen aren't entering Noah's ark, so they needed match two by two.

Answer 7

Ask the friend that lives far away, she's coming anyway and would probably be honored to be asked. Ask her and tell her that if she just wants to come to enjoy and not be in the wedding that that's fine with you. Congrats, the first years the hardest, remember that!!!

Answer 8

i wouldn't ask someone to be in my wedding just becuase i felt as though i needed an extra person. my cousin did that, and ended up having someone she didn't really care for in her wedding, and made it somewhat miserable.

if you are thinking of when the bridesmaids and grooms men walk down the isle it will be uneven, have them walk down the isle seperatly, they don't need to walk in pairs. that's what we are doing for my best friends wedding.

good luck, just rememeber it's your day, and you want to spend it with the people you care about the most, not people that you dont' really talk to anymore etc. hope this helps! ;]

Answer 9

Why do you need one more bridesmaid? Who says the numbers have to be even? Have one groomsman walk with 2 bridesmaids. If you really have to think hard about who you want standing up there with you, they shouldn't be up there at all.

Answer 10

Do you have to have more than one? If so, pick the one you are close to but lives far away. Be prepared to pay for her expenses.