My mother in-law is mean and selfish to both me and my wife. I have never said anything to my parents. They live so far away and we see each other only once a year. So when they ask I always say she is ok and leave it at that. My mom is here for a visit and my mother in law is mad at us for stupid things again and is giving us the silent treatment. She does not call or come over and she does not live far. My mom asked what is our relationship with her because she finds it odd that she is retired and not more involved in out daughter’s life. I side stepped the question and did not answer ( I did no lie just avoided) Now the Labor Day holiday is coming and she will really see the difference. We always have something really small like four or five friends over this is for every holiday. Her mother never comes for one reason or another she did not come for Christmas one year. My mom will ask again should i reveal all the awful things she does or keep it to myself
2007-08-29 00:25:24 · 13 answers · asked by Big Daddy R 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Your mom is no fool and can see an sense something is wrong. Its no big deal just tell her. Your monster-in-law is the one missing out so I hope you and your wife aren't concerned with it.
2007-08-29 00:50:33 · answer #1 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is best not to say anything. It is difficult to take back what has been said, and if there is ever a time when you want to get everyone together for any reason (wedding, funeral, whatever) there will be hard feelings. It won't do your mother any good to hear the negative, it will only make her worry. If you need to talk about your feelings, you might find a counselor. Most universities have free or low costcounseling programs with students in training doing the couneling.
2007-08-29 07:31:04 · answer #2 · answered by Shiro Jada 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It isn't always best to tell all. It may make it hard for your mom to be comfortable around your mil. In my own situation I tell my parents very little about my inlaws. My inlaws create alot of drama and silliness and my parents would just think they are completely ridiculous if they knew everything. They know a little, but the less I tell them, the better it is for when we all have to get together. I do tell them things I feel they should know. I would recommend telling your mom you have some frustrations, just don't go into all the detail and make it a big deal.
2007-08-29 09:17:46 · answer #3 · answered by I39 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people can talk to their mother on all levels and she will keep things to herself. Some mothers can't keep things to themselves. If you feel good about how your mother is with information then go ahead. If you feel your mom will become critical towards your mother-in-law and you don't want bad feelings flying around, you shouldn't tell her. You could just let your mom know that some parents aren't as involved as others with their children's lives and she can conclude whatever she wants from that. If your mom is the type to keep questioning, just let her know that's why you feel fortunate to have a close relationship with her.
2007-08-29 07:35:16 · answer #4 · answered by just2letuknow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't tell her how bad things are. You can say that you aren't that close to her and that she has her own life she chooses to lead. If you mom continues to ask just tell her that it is an area you don't feel right talking about. she should respect that and she will probably pick up on how things are. If you tell her how bad things are and then some day the MIL changes your mom will have a bad impression of her and that can make things difficult in the future.
2007-08-29 09:13:04 · answer #5 · answered by chris d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't dwell on it. Tell her that you don't always see things the same way and drop it. Nothing good can come from beating her up too bad.
2007-08-29 07:31:05 · answer #6 · answered by 55 and trying 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that you and your wife are not very close to her, as she is so busy with other things. Why start a war.
2007-08-29 07:29:48 · answer #7 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think you should tell your mom... it's better to let her know, first of all, it'll make her feel bad that you're not telling her your problems while it's bothering you so much.. and i think your mom can help.. try telling her.. nothing will be lost... she would still know that thing even if you don't tell her...
2007-08-29 07:39:57 · answer #8 · answered by vampire13 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"The truth shall set you free."
you shouldn't have anything to be shamed of. You didnt do anything wrong. Your motherinlaw sounds to me liek an immature, selfish person.
2007-08-29 07:32:30 · answer #9 · answered by ★Banäna . Nightmärẹ★™ 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes i would tell her.Then you dont have to cover up or lie for her.Be honest
2007-08-29 07:30:08 · answer #10 · answered by Gemini 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋