I'm kind of a classy guy in my opinion. I have sex when in a commited relationship only. I've been with one girl only, my current girlfriend. I don't have a double standard with girls, I believe that women can have sex just like men. However, I don't like to share myself with anyone that wants it, so I want a woman who is the same.
My girlfriend has been with 14 boys before me. A lot were one night stands with stupid boys that just wanted some booty (ie. having car sex with a 17 year old boy in a parking lot when she was 19.) She has never had a relationship like this one, with a caring guy who isn't just after wild sex.
I'm very confused about my feelings and what to do. I'm heartbroken because to me sex is very special, and it seems like every girl out there gives it away like yesturdays bagels.
I'm scared to leave her, then find out I can't find what I'm looking for and have lost her for nothing. What should I do? Are there any girls left with the same ideals?
2007-08-28 19:12:55 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Here's the thing-if you really like this girl for who she is today, then it shouldn't matter what she did yesterday.
2007-08-28 19:18:59 · answer #1 · answered by inevershoulda 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Hey Bro.
I'm in this same position. Except the girl I'm with, her number is lower than your girl's. And its the same story. She slept with all 1 night stands, and I was the first guy she actually had a relationship with, and slept with too. We recently broke up for 4 or 5 months, and I found out that she had had a few 1 night stands during that time too.
The only girls I've EVER met that are not like this are virgins, who save themselves, which are usually Christian or church going girls. Other girls now adays have no morals, and will give it up to any guy that'll flash a 100 dollar bill and some coach at them.
My recommendation to you is that if you're really not comfortable, leave her. and tell her its not going to work out. Don't make the same mistake I did. The situations never hardly work out.
2007-08-29 02:21:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should move on. You have different set of values and it will not work, because her past sexual history will always be on your mind, and what will end up happening is that you will cheat out of resentment or you simply will not respect her at all, and she will look cheap to you. the whole theory that if you love somebody, you'll take her regardless of her past is really bogus in the real life, since you will most likely always look at her like she is "damaged goods".
Look for a different group of girls, Christians, Mormons, some real Catholics, the ones that go to church, are in church groups, etc. Now there is no guaranty that they all will be more innocent or chaste but your odds will be better. Also look at girls raise in other countries (third world countries, no Europe). They tend to be more conservative in general.
People do change but girls with a history of many partners often do not, and their long term relationships tend to fail. For them also sex has a complete different value and meaning than for you. Try to stay away from needy girls(going from bf to bf) & party girls(lots of miles). Also you might want to look for red flags if you are looking for a girlfriend with values such as yours; such as drinking too much alcohol or wild friends. Heck if the girl has her tongue pierced, you know what your are getting. Also you will probably not find a gf like the one you want in a club, bar or sonority.
2007-08-29 03:04:55 · answer #3 · answered by malk e 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally I would say this..have some compassion for her situation in regarding the thoughts you would have for a sister or your mom. I mean no girl generally wants to start out with a bunch of torrid affairs..there are factors that influence those decisions. Just think basically if she had found a "nice guy" like yourself in the beginning she would not have had to experience all that. So be the nice guy and stick it out by introducing "a new way with you"If you are up to that challenge? If not head for the hills...basically you have to invest yourself with the person you are with in the here and the now...
2007-08-29 02:48:16 · answer #4 · answered by KrisDee 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
In a worst case scenario,even if you don't get another girl,that would still be a better bargain then to stick with the present girl.Having tasted the freedom and variety,she wouldn't be with you for a very long time.Enjoy while at it and modify your thinking.Of course,you shall get the girl of your liking,sooner than later.
2007-08-29 02:26:37 · answer #5 · answered by brkshandilya 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, they are in church, and waiting for marriage before having sex. If these are truly your values, then that's where you should look for your next girlfriend. There you will have the support of a social group that will pressure her to not have sex with any random guy.
2007-08-29 02:18:57 · answer #6 · answered by Marc M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cant change her past... it will never change.. but can u vouch for her the way she is now... and do u believe she can be committed in the future... if u can answer these questions u will find a way {}
2007-08-29 02:21:40 · answer #7 · answered by who ?? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i don't "give it away like yesterday's bagels"! i don't even believe in premarital sex... yes, eventually you will find someone...just keep looking.
2007-08-29 02:18:22 · answer #8 · answered by twinkletoes 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋