okay so, I'm getting marriend in october and no one in my family has offered to throw a bachlorett party for me. I have three really close girl cousins that I love and we all say we are sisters but none of them have stepped up to the plate. So today I called one of them and said hey I want to have a bachlorette party do you think you could organize it and I'll pay for everything? she was like for sure. Don't worry about it. I'll do it. when I was asking her this I wanted to cry because I was so hurt that I even had to ask. anyways what would you think if I asked you that? Would you be mad? hurt? what?
2007-08-28 15:54:12 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
my maid of honor is 14! and i only have one other brides maid and she is not in any position to through a party!
2007-08-28 16:02:33 · update #1
If I were your bridesmaid, I couldn't blame you for wanting a bachelorette party. I would probably feel a little guilty for not collaborating with the other legally aged girls in the first place. I wonder why they didn't step up to this, given the age of your MOH. Did they assume there would be no party since the MOH isn't in the position to do it (like you said)? Still, they should've come together for this. I feel bad that you had to call one of them up and make that offer, but hey, you're getting married, so celebrate all the same.
edit - I just re-read your extra comment about having one other bridesmaid. I don't understand why you were hurt for having to ask her about the party. Like you said, she, for whatever reason, couldn't do it, and your MOH is 14. Anyway, I wouldn't be mad if you asked me to host the party.
2007-08-28 17:10:02 · answer #1 · answered by Opal 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
October is still more than a month away. Your wedding may be uppermost in your mind, but for other people not so much. I think someone else would have come up with the idea closer to the date. A lot of people don't even do a bachlorette party, or at least not a formal one, just have a 'spur of the moment' get together the night before the wedding. Don't let it bother you that you felt you had to ask. You want a bachlorette party, now you're getting one. It doesn't matter how you got there.
Sounds like you're stressing over having a 'perfect' wedding and surrounding activities. Don't become a 'Bridezilla'. You'll enjoy everything more if you take a moment to relax and accept that everything won't play out the way you picture it will.
And to finally answer your question, it wouldn't really bother me to ask or be asked. Take a day to be mad/hurt about it then let it go. It's not worth letting it spoil your wedding.
PS I don't know how old your cousins are, but if your bridesmaid is only 14, they may not have considered having a bachlorette party because they think bachlorette parties have to be raunchy. (not true of course)
2007-08-28 23:43:03 · answer #2 · answered by conicat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should NOT be asking people to organize a bachelorette party.
1. They may have already been organizing one and was keeping it a SECRET!
2. Bachelorette parties and showers are not mandatory.
3. The bridesmaids and MOH are the ones to plan it no matter what age they are.
4. Even with the MOH being under 18, she could still plan and get help planning it with the other bridesmaids and her mother. It may not have been a strip club or bar, but it would have been a bachelorette party.
If I was in the bridal party, I would be a bit irritated if you asked that of me, for the reasons stated above.
If I wasn't in the bridal party, I'd be ticked that you asked that of me considering I'm not IN the wedding party at all.
How do you KNOW that they weren't planning a bachelorette party? Even if they said "no" you still don't know if they were or not, they may have wanted it to be a surprise.
2007-08-29 11:20:46 · answer #3 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, for some people, they might not think about throwing a party for someone. Congrats on getting married, though! No, I would not be offended, but maybe guilty and embarrassed that I hadn't thought of it first.
2007-08-28 23:00:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she does not know that she should throw you a party. I wouldn't get upset about. There are more important things in life.
2007-08-28 22:58:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
If your maid of honor and bridesmaids didn't offer to host one -or any other parties I'd be concerned. (Since that is part of their duties...) I'm not sure about your family situation but I wouldn't be too upset... I'd talk to her about it.
2007-08-28 23:04:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Throwing your bachelorette party is the responsibility of your maid of honour and the bridesmaids. Where are they?!?
2007-08-28 23:01:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
It could be a case of "I thought ____ was going to do it". I'm sure someone would have thought of it closer to the day!
2007-08-28 23:03:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋