3 years ago i totally went against my values and had sex with a guy the first night I met him. I knew of him but never talked to him until that night! let me tell you this guys was very very handsome! before we did the big uh oh he told me that he wasnt one of those guys who doesnt talk to a girl anymore after sex....i assumed he was lying but went on and sinned any way! Its been three years and we still talk and mess around....he's been in my life for the past 2 boyfriends! I think i really like him but did having sex with him first ruin my chances????
2007-08-28 07:08:39 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
no i dotn hink it does
but depends on the couple
2007-08-28 07:13:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I wouldn't say that having sex first "ruins" a relationship, but rather that it sets the tone for the relationship.
If a guy is just interested in sex, then he won't invest the time afterwards to get to know you. When you develop a friendship before having sex, the relationship has a much better chance of lasting, because it is founded on more than chemistry.
The fact that this guy has stayed in touch for the past 3 years would indicate that you went on to develop a friendship after the sex. So, it seems to me that a relationship could develop as well.
2007-08-28 14:17:39 · answer #2 · answered by Theresa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no cause a relationship is not built on sex its built on how you and the other person click. how well you get along and how much you have in common and your interests...and sex is just a part of it but relationships that are built around good sex don't last cause the sex will fade and you better have a lot in common to do and have same interests in... that what a lot of ppl think that sex is love and love is sex and its not its all the other things you do that is love and relationship....but don't get me wrong sex is part but should never be the main part cause the sex will drop off..and that's when the just being together and going and doing things and walking and talking comes in...and go home and hold each other and go to bed with no sex.... so if you can have a relationship with him it wont be from the sex it will be cause of the other things you do or don't have in common...good luck
2007-08-28 14:21:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It didn't ruin your chances but it did ruin two other relationships you had. If your going to be in a relationship you have to give that person all of you. You're giving something to someone that can give nothing back to you. The problem is not that you ruin a relationship with this person by having sex with them it is that you give this person your love, time and energy. Sex with someone who has a committment to you is okay. Sex with someone who your knowingly continues to use you is destroying you and any other possible fruitful relationship you might have
2007-08-28 14:18:39 · answer #4 · answered by elfabuluso 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably. You said you still talk and mess around. Basically he looks at you as a friend with benefits. He already gets to be friends with you and have sex with you. Why would he want to have all the crap that comes along with a relationship when he already has the good parts.
2007-08-28 14:14:45 · answer #5 · answered by JohnB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Based purely on the information you provided, you didn't ruin any future opportunity with this guy. If he continues to talk to you and continues to see you then you still have a number of opportunities. Tell the guy how you feel then you will get a better idea of what your "chances" are with him.
2007-08-28 14:14:48 · answer #6 · answered by labken1817 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not going to say it ruined it but don't do it all the time, people think that you keep a man like that ain't it, I will say this it does get old when you do it everyday all day, not the right thing to do, but if he has stuck with you thus far keep doing what you are doing.
2007-08-28 14:14:58 · answer #7 · answered by Smiley4ever 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think having sex with a guy on the "first date" is a bad thing. Most men are fine with it as long as they delude themselves into thinking this is the only time a gal has done this.
A lot of people have too many sexual hang-ups ...and one of them is this thought that women shouldn't have sex - or they're labeled promiscuous (or s-l-u-t-s).
I don't care if a woman is a s-l-u-t ...as long as she's MY s-l-u-t.
2007-08-28 14:20:40 · answer #8 · answered by Eric C 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most man think a girl is easy when she give up sex on the first date.he will be talking to u but will not take u serious
2007-08-28 14:15:22 · answer #9 · answered by Ben S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Chances for what? It sounds like you have a pretty good thing going. Asking him for a commitment may ruin your friendship. My wife even has one such friend, and none of us would have it any other way!
2007-08-28 14:15:55 · answer #10 · answered by Danny B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm... you should've thought this through more!
But no, I don't think having sex ruined your chances. It seems like you two still have eyes for one another... it's all good.
2007-08-28 14:13:57 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋