I got into deep conversations with this guy and he said the following things (he told me if I ever told anyone he'd be so mad at me but I have to know):
1. I'm afraid I'm going to get attached to you as more than a friend.
2. I'm afraid I'm falling in love with you. I can't do that.
3. I don't want to open up to you. If I don't close myself off completely to you you're that girl I'll tell everything to and regret it later.
4. I can't have feelings for you. I just can't.
5. I don't like how I feel about you right now. It must be wishful thinking because there is no way logically speaking that I can feel this way in this little time.
6. I'm afraid if I take a chance with you one of us will get hurt, but I'm also afraid if I pass it up I'll be making the biggest mistake of my life.
7. This can't go anywhere. I won't let it.
I really care about this guy, pleaz give me advice on how to handle him.
2007-08-28 04:40:26 · 9 answers · asked by Mikki Lynn Breisch 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Somebody's been watching too many soaps or reading too many romance novels. Little corny & scripted...to appear "sensitive."
RUN!!! Far far away.
2007-08-28 04:51:41 · answer #1 · answered by jillette 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok, I'm not going to decode them all for you because they all say the same thing. They all say, "I'm insecure." This guy is just insecure and unsure about a relationship, and I'll bet there's a reason why. Maybe he got hurt in the past. And, if that is the case, you have to let him know that going for something and it not working out will never hurt as much as spending the rest of his life wondering what could have been.
Ask "Why?" Why is he afraid of being in love with you? Why won't he allow himself to be with you. Why won't he give himself permission to be happy?
All you can do is try, and ask questions to find out what's going on. But it takes 2 to try. Don't waste your time on the guy if it doesn't look like things are going anywhere. If he continues denying himself permission to be happy, that's when you say "Fine, I'll go find someone who isn't afraid of love." That'll kick his insecurity in the butt REAL quick if he's really interested in you.
I wish you the best with this, and I hope I helped.
2007-08-28 11:51:56 · answer #2 · answered by puckfreak02 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, immediately, it sounds like he is playing with you. In one instance he is reeling you in and telling you what you want to hear, at the same time giving himself some insurance in case he decides it is not what he wants. Or does it come down to making a choice. Will he choose to take a chance on you or avoid it for fear of getting hurt? Either way, wouldn't allow this to go on too long. Really, allow him to sit the fence for a bit, but do not let him string you along for too long. Your feelings are at stake here too, not just his.
2007-08-28 11:54:07 · answer #3 · answered by Derek F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like this guy is married or committed to somebody else. Sounds like you want him but it seems like there is gonna be trouble here.
These sound like something I would say to a girl I've already had sex with but don't wanna do anything more with her without hurting her feelings. Hopefully that is not the case for you so good luck.
2007-08-28 12:51:39 · answer #4 · answered by darmonx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not a guy, But it sounds as if he has someone else he is really into.
You need to let him go and agree with him and be strong.
Even if you love him and don;t want to walk away.. you have to stop contact with him and let him realize.
2007-08-28 11:51:46 · answer #5 · answered by Teresa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you said boys but..
It sounds like he has had trouble in past relationships. He likes you, but is maybe afarid that he won't be able to remain faithful to you. I would just wait him out and see what happens.
Good Luck!!
2007-08-28 11:48:09 · answer #6 · answered by Kimberlee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In girl speak it's " I can't commit"
In boyspeak it's "I'd like to commit but I'm afraid you'll hurt me, and then spread it around to everyone I know..."
2007-08-28 11:48:15 · answer #7 · answered by Sophie B 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is just not ready to be with you right now but if he knows that he can take time to recover or so he could change his mind he is very confuced right now give him time
2007-08-28 11:46:01 · answer #8 · answered by avril_is_the_hotest 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he has emo issues, move on
2007-08-28 11:45:25 · answer #9 · answered by Daddys Princess 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋